My Time Machine
by Jou-ChanHimura
Summary: As a child Kaoru used to dream about him, but couldn't understand his words. One day she wakes up and finds herself on Bakumatsu days in Japan, where she finally meets him.
1. Chapter 1

**Hi Everyone! I am happy to be back after some years of silence. **

**Notes:**

**English is not my first language, you are probably going to find some grammar mistakes... Please Let me know if that happens. **

**If someone is disposed to be my beta reader I would appreciate a lot.**

**Anyway give a chance to this story. **

**I wrote the complete version in Portuguese now I am rewriting it in English.**

**Enjoy the First Chapter.**

**::**

**Chapter 1 – Dreaming about you**

"Mum! Where's dad?" – The girl asked with a smile forming in her child lips. Her mother smiled back.

_I don't know where she learnt to smile this way…she is always smiling like this, and her smile...seems to make everyone around feel happy. _

" Come on tell me where is he?" – The girl was now tapping her feet not understanding why her mother was just standing there looking thoughtful at her and didn't answered her question.

" He is upstairs, in the attic**…**" – she was ready to run upstairs when heard her mother's voice again: " – Kaoru, wait!"

The girl stopped.

" Take this." – she said giving her some juice and cake " – give this to your father… when he starts working he forgets to eat."

…

" May I came in?"

" Yes." – her father's voice was always so sweet, he made her feel so comfortable. It was as if she knew he would always be there to protect her.

Kaoru opened the door and came in… that old place was the one she loved the most in that house. It was filled of old and odd things that to her, valued a lot.

" Mother told me to give you this." – she said putting the cake and juice on the table.

Looking at the food he suddenly realized how hungry he was.

" But you dind't came here only because of the food, didn't you?" – He knew her too well and right now she was hiding something.

Kaoru smiled "– I had a dream father…"

" Did you? And what was your dream about?"- he asked picking a slice of cake.

She blushed " – I don't know… I saw a face… a man's face, and he spoke to me."

" What did he say?"

"He said my name... but then he spoke in a weird language and i didn't understand a single word ..."

_Strange… she never had a dream like this one before…_

" – But what did he said?" – he insisted

" – I've told you! I didn't understand, it was a weird language, with weird words." – she was pissed, her father didn't believe in her.

Kamyia put a hand on her daughter's shoulders… " – Let's make a deal…Next time you dream try to understand what he says to you, ok? "

She obediently nod, even knowing that it would be impossible for her to understand those words unless the guy in the dream decides to learn a different language.

" – Tell me love, do you know him? That man who appears in your dreams?"

She shook her head negatively and blushed.

Her father noticed that: "What? Why are your cheeks turning red?"

She shook her head: _He was a very handsome man. _That's what made her blush, but she wouldn't say that to her father... "His hair was like fire..."

" – Why don't you play with your friends?" – he asked as he searched for one of the tools that he needed.

She didn't answered

" – Kaoru?"

Kaoru was sadly staring at the floor.

" – What's the matter, love?"

"– I don't have any friends." – She sadly said, tears forming in her eyes.

Yes, Kaoru left all her friends in Lisbon…now that they moved she didn't have any friends to play…

Monetary problems were the reason that forced them to move to Oporto. Kaoru's mother worked as designer and her father that used to be an accountant was now they were living in a very old house, which had already belonged to Kaoru's grandmother.

" What are you doing?" – Kaoru asked trying to keep her mind away from her own problems.

" I am creating a new machine…" – he replied " – a time machine…" – whispered as if he was revealing some sort of top secret information.

" Oh! Really? And what does that mean?" – She asked amused by her father's expressions

" You can travel in time, Kaoru, with this machine you can change the past and even the future…" Off course he knew that wasn't a time machine,(yet) it was just and old, broken tv, but he wanted to lift his daughter's mood.

Kaoru was amazed. She had never heard something like that before. Her father noticed her enthusiasm; he knew how she believed in his creations, like anyone else did. But he also knew that if she told her mother about this, she would became angry with him, he almost could hear his wife saying: _"– Feeding her imagination with silly things… That will not help her to grow!"_

So this time he warned her:" This it's going to be our secret, ok?"

The girl was so exited with her father's new creation…_Travel in time… that would be very good! But what would I do if I had that chance?_

That night she felt asleep exhausted of thinking about that… And along with all the thinking she had a dream...

_:::_

_There was a strange mist inside of the attic, she heard her father's voice a few steps from her._

_Dad? Where are you? – her voice was so weak, she walked forward and saw a her father's form. Kaoru ran closer to him._

" _Kaoru, look what I made for you!" – he said pointing to an object that was in the floor_. _Her father seemed older, like he was eighty years old, and was trembling at every move._

" _Father what's happening with you?" – she asked worried. Wrinkled hands, pale face... and he seemed so tired... _

_But he ignored her question:_" – _Look! It's done! I finally finished it! The time machine!" – it was like he was hallucinating_

" _Father! I don't care about that, I am worried about you!" – she put her hands in his arms trying to embrace him._

_" Oh! My Kaoru. Don't you see? It's a gift for you, for your eighteen years! I worked so hard! There were times when i thought i would never make it, but i did!"_

_He stood pointing to the object, the time machine, as he called it, but he looked more as a television. _

_Oh God! He is not in his mind! – she thought – " But daddy! I am only six!" _

_When he heard her saying that his face darkened: "This means i am not going to be here till you achieve that age..."_

"_What...?" _

_From a moment to another a spark of light appeared at the machine 'screen... along with an image... a face... His Face..._

_She completely forgot about her father, and stared at him…_ _Kaoru didn't knew why, but suddenly a felling of sorrow took over her…She shouted:_" – _Tell me, who are you? Why do you still appearing in my dreams?"_

_His facial expression changed. She felt that the red haired boy was about to say something._ _And he did, but this time he talked very slow, as if he wanted her to note his words:_

" _Ga inakute sabishii, Kaoru-dono"_

_::::_

**Like it? Hate it?**_  
><em>

**Please Review... Help me out with the grammar please.  
><strong>


	2. Chapter 2

**Thank you, Kao Misao 1728; Hanna chanS2; Kasuikage, for reading My Time Machine. Also thank you for your suggetions. **

**Hope you like chapter 2.  
><strong>

**Chapter 2 – A Real Nightmare**

After that strange dream, Kaoru decided that it would be better to check on her parents. She got up from bed, passed through the hallway and entered cautiously into their room. She tiptoed next to them and noticed her father was peacefully sleeping.

Relieved, she went back to her room.

:

Kaoru stared at the moon through her window. It was full and bright. It was a beautiful to admire, but instead, she felt sad, she felt loss, like as if something was missing…

"Ga Inakutte sabishii…" – she whispered those words… the same words he said.

What was the meaning of that? What's the point of speaking to her in a different language, one that she doesn't understand?

Kaoru felt her eyes wanting to shut, her body became heavy, her arms and legs lost their strength… yes, she was getting tired. But she didn't came back to bed, instead she remained there contemplating the moon.

_Tell me… I am ever going to understand what he means?_

**Eleven years later**

For ten years things stood the same. Kaoru's mother was always working, and her father spending more and more time alone in that attic… Sometimes she freaked out, realizing that he was looking too much like the man in that nightmare…

Days passed fast… Turning into weeks and weeks turned into months, and months in years…

Kaoru grown up, and the strange dreams stopped, but she had never forget his face or his words…

"Kaoru!Kaoru!" – a familiar voice called her

It was Misao. The girl came into her room and realizing Kaoru was still dressing, she yelled: "We are late! By now we should already be heading school!"

"Yes… I Know…" – Kaoru mumbled – "But I am so tired…"

"Don't even thing about that!" – the girl pointed her finger to her – "You have to go! Have you forgot that today it's math's test?"

"Oh my…" – She had forgotten. Last night she was so enthusiastic about helping her parents packing their things for holidays that she completely forgot about math.

"Humm… Your parents, they leave at 9h00 am, isn't it?" – Misao reluctantly asked

"Yes."

"… and… when are you going to join them?"

Kaoru noticed the sadness in her friend's voice. "In a week. It matches the end of the semester. But I promise I will come back soon… And I will call you every day on the phone." – she knew that besides Sano, she was her only friend. Misao wouldn't have anyone else to talk to if Kaoru wasn't around.

"My parents deserve it Misao. It had been ten years since the last time they spent some time together, without any worries…"

Misao understood. She knew they had some financial issues, and they were very humble people.

"I know… It's just… I am going to miss you Kaoru."

"I am going to miss you too Misao…" – Kaoru hugged her for a while. "Maybe in that holidays you find the one you are searching for…" – she said a glint of hope in her voice. Kaoru chucked in disbelief.

Suddenly Misao grasped: "Oh… I forgot to tell you! I searched for the meaning of those words you told me."

"What?" – Kaoru felt her heart beating faster.

"It's Japanese, and basically means something like: I am so lonely with you, or I miss you…"

Miss me? How can someone I don't know miss me? Probably her research is mistaken. Kaoru shook her head. "Thank you for your help Misao. But I am going to forget him. He is just a dream. You are real, My life is real, but he is not." – she knew she was lying, but for her own sanity it would be the best thing to do. Forget about those dreams, those odd, stupid dreams.

"Misao, help me out with this, it's getting late!" – she said putting her books inside of the bag.

_I don't knowwhy you became so nervous when He is mentioned. But, someday you will meet him… That I am sure! I am not letting you forget your dreams Kaoru! That's a promise! _

_:::::::::::::::::::._

**_IN SCHOOL – MATH'S TEST_**

"Psst… Jou-chan!"

"What Sano?" – she whispered

"Tell me the third answer!" – Sano asked

Yes, Sano was no good in math's. But she couldn't blame him. It was a really difficult subject. That's why she always helped him.

"Sano, the answer it's too long…"

"Come on Jou-chan… I need that answer.."

Someone knocked at the door and as the teacher went to open it, Kaoru turned back, and switched test's with him.

"Gosh! Are you crazy?" – he asked surprised with her acts.

"Quickly, write that on the paper, and give it to me again!"

" Kaoru.." – she heard her teacher's voice referring to her.

_Busted… - _she thought

"Kaoru, please, let's go outside. I have something to tell you. " – her tone was awkward. She didn't seem mad at her; she didn't even notice her switching tests with Sano. No. That old woman, who knew her since she entered in that college, had a sad look in her eyes. She was trying to find a way to tell her something. Something painful.

Kaoru became nervous. What could it be?

"What's happening Miss Laura?"

"Your parents…" – the old woman tried to restrain the tears

Kaoru got up abruptly, her chair falling down. "Why are you crying? What happened to my parents?"

She took Kaoru's hand and said: "They had an accident…"

"What?" – Kaoru couldn't believe. Why was that happening? Right now they were having their so desired vacations.

"I have to see them. I need to talk with my father!"

"Kaoru… they died."

No… It couldn't be.

_Kaoru, your parents died… You cannot that to them anymore… _those words echoed in her head, making her feel dizzy. As if she was being punched in the head over and over again.

No. a punch would hurt less.

"YOU ARE A LIAR!" – She bawled stepping back from her teacher. Sano hold her arms and pushed her close to his chest. "Sano… she is lying… I know they are alive… they cannot die! It's a mistake… isn't it?" – she looked faltered – "I cannot be alone… am I alone Sano?"

"Shhh… Everything is going to be ok, Kaoru, I promise… I will always be here…"

"Nothing, nothing is right anymore Sano! Nothing makes sense anymore!" – she screamed.

:::

**Liked it?**

**Everything is happening so fast in this one. Ten years passed in only a chapter! But i promise in the next one things are going to be different.**

**Kenshin is going to appear in chapter 3.**

**Beijos- Kisses**

**Jou-chan**


	3. Chapter 3

**Hi everyone!**

**I'd like toThank for the reviews and for your help with grammar...**

**Sorry for the late... ... i posted it in a hurry and dind't have time to check on grammar mistakes this time... **

**Sorry.**

**I hope you like this one**

**Chapter 3 – Battousai**

Kaoru felt awful. She knew she had promised Sano she would get better and come back to school as soon as possible, but everything reminded her about them. That house, the pictures on the hall, the scents… There were recordations's everywhere.

How could her life get back to normal without them?

She looked at the clock.

_It´s time to take my pills._

Kaoru took the box on the table and opened it.

_Well, I think he told me to take two of these ones here – _she thought looking at the blue ones - _And half of that one before the lunch._

She wasn't sure, but she took them anyway and went to the attic.

Once in there, she behold at all the toys and inventions her father made during those last years. But one of them caught her eyes.

She kneeled down next to the old object. _You spent so many years building this and died without finishing it, father… _she thought, referring to the machine her father used to claim to be magical.

_Yeah1 Magic! – _she grunted

Tears rolled down her cheeks… Kaoru didn't wanted to cry, but it hurt her so much to be alone…

She got up decided to leave the attic, when she felt like she was being punched at the chest… suddenly her heart started beating faster and faster… She tried to hold herself against the door, but, the pain was so strong… Kaoru opened her mouth in an attempt to breath…

_I can't hold on anymore…_

After few seconds she fainted and fell on the floor.

:::

Screams… She heard screams of pain… Someone was screaming for mercy, screaming desperately trying to survive.

Kaoru felt drops… she thought she was crying, but the drops were so cold that she realized it couldn't be her tears…

Slowly she regained her conscience… She was all wet.

_Where am i?_

She got up from the rigid, cold, uncomfortable and dirty floor.

"Death to Ishishinshi!" – she heard a man's voice screaming.

_What the hell is that?_

Kaoru run following the sound of the screams. She faced a dojo,(like the ones she imagined to exist on Japan) not to far from the place she woke up. She came closer to the door, it was ajar, and to took the chance to peek to the inside.

She couldn't believe what her eyes were seeing: A group of men dressing like ancient samurais, holding swords and red flags, were threatening a woman and two little children, maybe at the age of five or six.

One of the men, the one that probably was the leader, shouted:

"The ones who belong to Ishinshinshi have to die as well."

The woman holding the two children with all her strengths begged:

"Please… please… Spare the children… Please, they are too young to die… Kill me instead of them…"

The man smiled deviously:

"When your husband comes home and see both of his sons death, tell him, it was a message from the Shinsen Gumi."

When the swordsman was about to attack them, Kaoru run and without thinking twice she putted herself in front of them.

Luckily he stopped before his sword could hurt Kaoru. "Stupid girl!" – he shouted

"I don't think I am the stupid one here. Using a sword to kill woman and children it's an act of stupidity itself."

By the look on his face, he didn't like what she said. "Step aside." – he ordered.

"No! I don't understand what's happening here, but shouldn't you Samurai protect the weak ones? Where is your honor? What kind of men are you?" – she snarled. She was so convicted of what she was saying that for a moment the group of assassin became confused. She talked like she had no fear of them. – "There is no way I am not going to step aside and let your murder these people."

"Well, that means you are a very stupid girl. Because tonight, you are going to die as well." – he started to running at her holding his sword.

Kaoru closed her eyes. _It´s now… _But instead of felling the pain of being cut by a sword, she felt nothing. She only heard something hitting the floor. That's when she opened her eyes, and saw the man that a few seconds ago was trying to kill her, laying on the floor, his body covered with blood. He was dead.

In front of her, acting like a shield, there was another man. He himself was holding a sword too, but what called her attention were his eyes… They were amber.

Kaoru shivered.

_It's him… The man I used to dream with when I was a child… Maybe he is the reason I am here… he brought me here…But he seems different now… Younher than in my dremas… and there's something different about his face… Oh, yes… he had a scar… and his eyes, they are also different as well…_

At the mean time her savior shielded his sword and glanced at his enemies. They shouted something like: "Battousai we are going to get our revenge…" – and start running away.

After that, he stared at her.

"Thank you… I don't know what to say." – she heard the woman behind her saying – "You were so brave… I owe you my life, and the life of my sons…"

Kaoru dind't knew what to say:

"Where am i?" – she asked her.

The woman stared at her in disbelief: "You are not from here?"

Kaoru looked at him, hoping he could recognize her: "You! You are the one that called me here. What do you want from me?" – she demanded, getting closer to him.

Battousai shook his head negatively. He dind't understood was she was saying.

"Please… what do you want from me?"

But no words came out from his mouth… He was more confused than her. "I don't know you…I am sorry…" – he whispered

"You don't know… me?" – she repeated his words and walked backwards.

He shook his head… "No…"

Kaoru couldn't hold on anymore. Tears streamed down her face. She started running, running away from them… Trying to find a way to get out from this nightmare.


	4. Chapter 4

**Hi everyone!  
>My spellchecker is telling me i have problems using the passive voice... May you help me out and tell me some expressions in this chapter where i shouldn't use it?<br>Sorry for the delay writting this chapter. My difficultie are in between the talks... to describe their expressions, their thoughts, moves and actions...**

**It took me a long time to write this chapter and i read it 3 times before i post it, and in every reading i found new errors. It's stressing me up...**

**kokoronagomu;obeymyeffingrod;kenshinotaku;The Musings of a Muse; i'd like to thank you for all your support, your opinions always help me to improve and encourage me to continue.  
>I hope you to enjoy this Chapter.<br>**

**Chapter 4 - Kenshin Himura**

Kaoru felt lost. After half an hour running, she found herself in the middle of nowhere… She almost died minutes ago trying to save those people she had never seen before. At the moment that happened she was scared but certain she was doing the right thing… But after she saw him and he didn't recognize her… she felt numb. She thought he would give her answers...

Raindrops… It was starting to rain…

_Why am I not dead? I should have died with them! At least I wouldn't experience this emptiness inside… _she was kneeling down praying… Praying for all of this to be just a nightmare… she rubbed her arms. _It's so cold._ She missed Misao, if she was there she would do everything to cheer her up… And Sano… she missed the protection he used to give her… She was all by herself this time…

"O genki desu ka?" – someone from behind her said. Immediately she got up and looked back. It was him, the red-haired man, Battousai… as they called him.

_He killed that man, so easily, with no fear… he's probably dangerous… _Kaoru stepped back at the remember of the man's body lying lifeless on the floor.

In what concerned to him, he was very confused.  
><em>Why is she afraid? I saved her life… What in the world made her run away from Katsura's place that way?<br>Do I know her? No… I would remember. I could never forget those eyes if I had seen them before. But she said I called her here… Maybe she is just confused…_

He wanted answers… But at the moment Kenshin only wanted to take her somewhere safe… Edo streets were a dangerous place at night, especially for such a beautiful girl dressing those… whatever she was dressing… it was strange.

"O genki desu ka?" – he asked again

_What is he saying? I Don't understand… that's strange… a few moments ago, when he spoke to me I understood his words… but now… he is speaking strange…_

Kaoru opened her mouth to speak and she was surprised when her words sounded different from what she was expecting: "Hai, genki desu." (yes, I am fine.) – _What is this? Some kind of magic?_

He approached. She shivered felling his amber eyes upon her.

"Tell me your name miss, please."  
>"Kaoru." – she nod.<p>

_Kaoru…_ he tasted her name for a while before asking: "Tell me your family's name, so I can take you home, Kaoru-dono, your parents... they must be worried."

"You can't." – once more she was being remembered how alone she really was. "They died some days ago." – she felt her legs shaking, and her head was so heavy… she could barely hear her own words with the sound of the raindrops hitting the floor…

Noticing she was about to faint, he hold her for a while before picking her up in his arms.

"Kaoru-dono you are too weak to be running in the rain… I think it would do no harm If I take you home…" he puts his lips closer to her forehead – "Fever."

He carried her all the way back to his place and left her in his own room. She needed to get some sleep… She probably was still in shock because of what happened to her parents, and that would be the reason she acted so different from others.

Kenshin took his sword off his hip and started preparing a hot tea. _She is going to get sick wearing that wet clothes…She should take them off._ He shook his head at the thought. Obviously she would think he was a pervert if he attempted to change her clothes while she was sleeping. _Shhh… Himura you really are a mess around women…_

"Mr Battousai?"  
>She was looking at him from the kitchen door. Kenshin realized she was wondering where they were.<p>

"We are at my house Kaoru-dono. You fainted outside." – he picked up a cup, filled with boiling tea and gave it to her – "Take this."~

She put both hands around the cup: "It's so warm…" – she shivered.

"You should also take off that wet clothes or you are going to get even more sick." – he said – "I can borrow you some of my own clothes until… yours are dry."

"Thank you." - Her eyes focused on his hands. He was a samurai, of that she was sure. And He must be a good one… Skilled…

"Kaoru-dono, are you afraid of me?" – Kenshin needed to know. Death was a constant in his life… He learn that some years ago… The screams people do when they are slashed, the blood… it didn't scared him anymore…But for someone so innocent as she seemed to be, he was sure it was an awful scenario when he killed those guys in front of her. It didn't matter if he saved her… It was only natural if she was afraid of him… _Who wouldn't? _"I assure you I mean no harm to you."

"I know." She replied immediately, as if she was sure of it... " Why do that men wanted to kill those people?" – Kaoru asked trying to understand the situation she had just jumped into.

Kenshin's eyes widen open in surprise: "Don't you know who she is?" – she couldn't be serious… Everyone in Edo knows who Sakura was...  
>Kaoru shook her head negatively.<br>_Maybe she is not from this city…_ "She is Katsura's wife and Katsura is the head of Ishinshinshi."

"Ishin what?" - _What a strange name… _Judging by the way he stared at her, she must have asked something stupid.  
>He approached her: "You don't know who Ishinshinshi are?" – he asked in disbelief – "Where have you been in this last three years Kaoru-dono? Do you at least know that we are in war?" There was no way she couldn't know that… Even if she wasn't Japanese she would know that they were in a middle of a civil war…<p>

"War?" – the word ranging in her head. What happened to her peaceful life? In what world was she living now?  
>She was disturbed… he could see that… she was trying to process the information but it seemed to be too much for her to handle. "Kaoru dono, you really should rest."<p>

She shook her head. Kaoru was trying to fight the tears from falling, she didn't wanted to burst in front of him. She needed to be alone.  
>"Kaoru-dono." – she heard him saying. His voice was now different, softer than before… It was the same tone he use to talk to her in her dreams. "Why? Why risk your own life to save someone you don't even know?"<p>

Kaoru stared at him. Only now she took the time to notice he was handsome, with that flaming hair, and astonishing golden eyes… perfect… there were no imperfections in his face… at least none that she couldn't notice. _I never saw someone like him… Seems like a hero from a movie or a prince from a fairy tale… Well, except for the eyes… They are too deadly… _

"Kaoru-dono?" – only when he said her name again, she realized she had failed to ask his question.

Kaoru took a deep breath: "I just couldn't sit there and watch them die."  
>"But then you would die too." – Kenshin immediately replied. "Don't you value your own life?"<br>"Yes, I do…But everyone deserves to live." – she said still hazy with the information he gave her before.  
>He insisted. For some reason her reaction intrigued him. "Everyone? But what if they were wicked persons? " – if mentioned her to sit.<br>"It's not up to me or you to decide who lives or dies… That's…God work… I think…" – she looked up at him – "But you are a samurai… Don't you fight to save people?" – Kaoru adjusted herself at the small pillow.  
>A fade a smile appeared in Kenshin's lips. <em>So Naïve…<em>He turned to get his own cup.  
>"You saved me and those people with your sword." – she added.<br>"In order to protect some I have to kill others…" – he said turning to face her again  
>"Oh."Kaoru wanted to protest… He was being so gentle to her... but his logic was right. To save her he killed those men. She was trapped in her own ideology. "I am sorry."<p>

"It's ok. Kaoru-dono. What you did was very brave…" – he sat in front of her - "And stupid too." – _A few years ago… I would make your words mine… I used to think I could change the world with my sword, but now I see how wrong I was._

"I have nothing left to lose." – she said, her words almost forming a whisper  
>"You are too young to say that." – he assured looking deeply into her eyes.<br>Kaoru chosen not to argue that.  
>They stood drinking the tea in silence for some minutes before she broke it, she needed to know more about that place, about him:<p>

"Mr Battousai, I.."

"Don't call me that!" – he said a glint of irritation in his tone – "I hate that title."  
>"Oh. I am sorry, I heard those man calling you… I assumed it was your name." – By the way he spoke of it, it wouldn't have a pleasant meaning.<br>_Name? You are strange Kaoru-dono…_ "My name is Himura Kenshin."  
>"Himura Kenshin…" – she tasted his name for the first time… <em>all these years I dreamed with him, but he never told me his name… and now I know it…<em> a shiver run down her spine.

"I am going to borrow you some dry clothes." – he got up and went to his room.  
>After a few seconds he came back, a white fabric in his hands.<p>

"You can wear this until yours are dry." - he gave her the clothes.  
><em>Why am I keeping her here? Sakura asked me to take her to their house… But there's something inside me screaming not to… Why? <em>Kenshin stared at her thoughtfully. _She said I called her here… I want to know what she meant by that. _He looked at her again. She was tired.

"You must sleep." – he lead her to a small room – "This is my room. I have a meet to attend, and it will end up late. I am probably back in the morning. Then, we talk again." _  
><em>Kenshin entered in the room to get his sword that was resting near his pillow. "Have a good night." – he said passing by her.

"Thank you." – she looked back to see him leaving, but he was already gone.  
>Kaoru came into his room wondering what to do. Should she stay there? Or should she leave? Was this a livid dream? Kaoru has always thought about the day she would meet him… But this was different from everything she had imagined. <em><br>_Sitting on the futon unable to decide she wondered: _What am I going to do? _

_::::_

**So, they finnaly met! (well they met at the previous chapter, but she ran away) But he came after her...  
>Kenshin is intrigued with this strange girl, she is different from the ones he knows and she is completly oblivious to the reality of his world...<br>I will put my efforts in writing long chapters. In my portuguese stories chapters are longer than in english... i am working on that.**

**Do you like it?**

**Hope to ear something from you.**

Jou-chan

**Thanks**


	5. Chapter 5

**Hi everyone!**

**First of all: Thank you for all your reviews and opinions. My school is over for a month so i think i am going to post with more frequency than now.**  
><strong>Second, thank you all for helping me to improve my grammar.I haven't correct the previous chapters, but now i will.<strong>

**Ned Flanders thank you for your reminder in what concerns to Kaoru's nationality. I will explain that not in this chapter but probably in the next one.**

**What can i say? I am soooo happy you are all liking this fic!**

**I hope you enjoy chapter 5.**

**Chapter 5 – Your Truth is a fantasy**

Kenshin was in his way to the place he agreed to meet the others.

_… I Just can't sit there and watch them die!... _Her words remembered him of a young version of himself arguing with his stubborn master Hiko. Kaoru was strange… But he sympathized her. As if she possessed the innocence that they took away from him since the moment he agreed to be a member of Ishishinshi.

He felt unkward next to her. It didn't mean that he disliked being near her… But he felt strange... Her eyes seemed to engulf him… he felt trapped sometimes… like when she said that his role as a samurai was to protect people… He had to admit that even if they called themselves "Protectors of the people", things were not so beautiful when it came to the truth.  
>Death is not beautiful. Never. Especially when caused by his own hands.<p>

"Hitokiri Battousai!" – he heard someone calling him. It was a challenge, he could tell that by the tone the other man used. Kenshin didn't turn back. He was tired of this useless fights…  
>He felt the enemy running in his direction. Kenshin unsheathed his sword and turned to face him.<p>

"Kyiosato, please stop! Don't do this!" – an old man yelled, but it was already too late…  
>It happened so fast… Kyiosato didn't get the chance to see Kenshin's movement or defend against his strike... The only thing he felt was the pain of the blade slashing him…<br>When his body hit the floor, he realized Battousai also killed his old friend…

He dragged himself to reach a flower maybe a meter away from him.  
>A Familiar face appeared in his mind… <em>How stupid was I?... Forgive-me anata… I hope you to forgive-me Tomoe…<br>_  
>Kenshin tried to understand what he was mumbling about, but he only heard the name Tomoe…<br>He took a deep breath and closed his eyes. _This man had a family…_

While cleaning his sword he glanced at his own reflection and only then he realized the bleeding on his left cheek. His eyes widened when he touched his face. It was a cut. It didn't hurt but it was bleeding a lot. _I dindn't notice… _Kenshin glanced back at the man behind him. He was already dead. _Your wish to kill me was strong… _he walked next to him pick up the flower he once tried to grab and put it in Kyiosato's hand. _I wish you were successful…_

The red-haired man got up and made his way to Katsura's place.  
><em>One more night… one longer and dirty night.<em>

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Kaoru couldn't sleep. How was she supposed to sleep in a house that wasn't hers?  
>Not to mention that never in her life she saw someone being killed in front of her… That image was still in her mind… Kenshin and his amber eyes along with his sword dripping with blood.<br>She sighed.  
>His eyes were so different in her dreams. And he seemed kinder. Well, it was nice he let her stay in his house, but, she thought he would stand by her side and explain her why she was here.<br>_He does not know either._ She realized that during their conversation_. He does not know you, your foolish girl! The dreams… they were your dreams not his… So why am I here? _She looked at the ceiling…_ And how is this possible? _Kaoru got up and started walking around his place… There was no such thing as televisions, radios, micro-waves, electric-light… They seemed to be living in other century.  
><em>It's a Time Machine, Kaoru!...<em> her eyes widened remembering her father words in that dream.  
>"A Time Machine… It can't be…" - her hand flew to her chest. <em>Did my father finished that machine? <em>She shook her head. _ .. That's impossible.  
><em>  
>The nightmare… She remembered that in her nightmare her father seemed older and ill… "Is my father's death connected with everything that's happening to me?" – she asked out loud<p>

_This is nonsense._

"What in the world is happening to me?" – she cried – "I wish I could change everything… Change my past… change that you're gone…" – Kaoru went outside and watch the rain falling – "I am all alone, not even Sanoor Misao are here anymore… " – She crossed her arms around herself – "I don't feel… me…"

She step out of the porch and felt the raindrops in her face, her hair… She was going to get wet again, but it didn't matter. At the moment she wanted to forget where she was and try to find herself again in the middle of all that mess… With eyes closed she turned her face up. "What is my purpose here?"

_If I was home, In this weather I would be at bed along with my headphones listening moonlight sonata. Within an hour I would feel the pleasant smell of coffee and fresh bread, and my mother would be calling me to take the breakfast..._

"I star to believe that you want to get sick."

Kaoru grasped realizing she was not alone. "Kenshin!"_  
><em>He was staring at her, probably wondering what in the world was she doing outside getting wet, when he had lent her his house, so that she could rest.

"I am sorry… I wasn't…" – Kaoru noticed is face bleeding – "What happened to your face?"

Kenshin's hand covered the wound : "It's just a small cut."  
>Kaoru came closer: "It bleeds a lot, we must take care of that. Where's the first aid kid?"<p>

"What?" – he asked  
><em>Seems like they don't use that here…<em> Facing her silence Kenshin decided to start moving to the inside andKaoru followed him.

"I am going to fetch some water to clean the wound. " – she informed passing behind him.  
>"That's not really necessary." – he said<br>"Off course it is."

"Kaoru-dono, I just need to rest, I take care of that after." – he took of the sword from his hip and placed it on the porch.

"It's just a second, and I will stop bugging you." – she replied. Kaoru wanted to do something to help That was her way of being thankful to him.

After five minutes she appeared on the porch along with a bucket of water and a strand of cloth. Kaoruknelled beside him and started cleaning his wound.  
>"How did this happen?"<br>He didn't replied and she realized that it was for the best. Kaoru didn't needed to know if he did something that would scarred her.  
>"This cut… It will leave a scar…" – suddenly an image came to her mind… His image on her dreams… He used to have a scar… An X… "The first part…" – she murmured<br>But he captured her words: "The first part? The first part of what?"

She shook her head: "Nothing…" – she said nervously.

But she was being too mysterious and he was already in an alert state."Kaoru-dono, why don't you tell me the truth?" – it was easy for him to realize she was hiding something. "I told you I will not hurt you… " In his mind the only reason for her to be afraid of telling something was lack of trust.

"I know you don't wanna hurt me." – she answered - "You saved me." – she put the cloth inside of the bucket and took a deep breath. "It's just that it doesn't make any sense."

Kenshin leaned forward to look her in the eye: "Tell me." – his tone was calm. He could feel that she was experiencing a dilemma and he wanted to help her.

"You're going to assume that I am crazy." – she turned her head to the side avoiding his gaze, but he didn't let his chance escape, Kenshin gently touched her chin forcing her to face him. "I thought you were crazy when you gave away your life to save someone you didn't know… So… Try."  
>His eyes were scrutinizing every muscle of her face, anticipating her words or encouraging her to talk...<br>Kaoru felt that she would sound foolish if she told him the truth, but, the way he looked at her… It was as if he would know if she lied… "I… think I've seen you before." – her words sounded like a whisper but once again he captured it.  
>"When?" – he asked is face not showing any difference from before.<br>She took another deep breath and said: "In a dream."

This time he reacted… He lifted his eyebrow "In a dream?"  
>"Ye…Yess… But in the dream you're a bit different." – Kaoru's hands were shivering – "I know you would think I am crazy, so let's just stop right here." – she has about to get up but Kenshin's arm made her stop. "I want to know the rest. Please how different was I?…"<br>Kaoru swallow hard - "You looked older… And… You had a scar… An X… in your left cheek."

_Why does she look like she is saying the truth, when everything she tells me seems to be invented? It's her eyes… her eyes show me that she is not lying… But her truth seems a fantasy...  
><em>  
>Kaoru stood there waiting for his reaction… At the beginning she thought he was going to say she was out of her mind… Then he opened his mouth to say something… to question her further… but for some reason he gave up and ended up staring at her.<br>"We should rest." – it was his last sentence.

Kaoru closed her eyes and sighed: "You don't believe me… I can't blame you… I am still trying to understand how I ended up here… "

"Kaoru-dono, you seem tired and confused. You probably haven't slept since yesterday, so you need to rest." – he got up and helped her to do the same – "Tomorrow I will help you to realize what happened ok?" – Kaoru sighed once again.  
>He was trying to be nice, but she knew he was not going to be capable of helping her… It was beyond his reach. But she didn't wanted to be stubborn and made him think that she wasn't grateful to him: "Ok." – she decided to let it go.<p>

"I will sleep on the dojo. You stay in the bedroom." - he gave a smile before leaving.  
>"Thank you Kenshin."<p>

Once he was gone, Kaoru went to her room… Which was in fact His room?  
>She covered herself with the blanket and her fatigued eyes started to shut… after a while she was in a deep slumber.<p>

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::…  
>Kaoru came into the dojo and saw Kenshin cleaning his sword. Once he sensed her presence Kenshin sheathed his sword and gave a small smile to her. She stepped closer and sat beside him offering him a cup of tea he gladly accepted. "Kenshin, why do you work for them?"<br>The red-haired man looked at the cup in his hand… he seemed lost in thoughts… "I thought it was for the best…"  
>"You're saying you're regretted of being a member of the Ishishinshi?" – Kaoru asked.<br>"Half."  
>"Why? It's because you have to kill people?" – she asked<br>Kenshin's eyes got deeper: "I wanted to help people not to kill them…"  
>She felt the sadness in his voice and the pain in his look, and it hurt her to see him this way: "But you help people Kenshin, you helped me!"<br>He gave her a smile as his hand closed on hers: "I am glad you're here Kaoru-dono… With you I feel… different…"  
>Kaoru cheeks redden at the proximity between them: "Do you?"<br>He caressed her face and their heads became closer… But then he stopped.  
>"What's happening?" – she asked<br>"Someone is out there, wait here." – he said before leaving the dojo.

When she was alone she started thinking about Kenshin and the moment before he left… Seemed like he was going to kiss her… she blushed and smiled… _I am kissing the man of man dreams!_  
>She was anxious for his return… she wanted more…<br>As a response to her wish he came into the room again.  
>Kenshin was facing the wall and giving his back to her. "Who was it Kenshin?"- she asked<br>When he turned to her his eyes were different… gold yellow: "You lied to me."  
>She immediately got up: "What are you talking about?"<br>"You're a traitor!" – he shouted – "Why Kaoru-dono? Why? I thought you cared for me…"  
>"Kenshin, I am not understanding… Please." – she tried to reach his arms but he refused being touched by her. She was shocked. In a moment he was being kind and now he was acting like this. Tears formed in her eyes: "I am not understanding Kenshin…"<br>He shook his head trying to avoid her eyes for a while… Something made him change his attitude around her… radically… What could have been?  
>"I have to kill you…" – his voice cracked – "I have to kill you Kaoru-dono." – there was a mix of hate, pity and pain in his eyes… he advanced to her with the sword on his hand.<br>Her legs started shaking and she let herself fell on her knees as he approached. "Don't do this…Please… Nooooooooooooooooo….."

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

"Kaoru-dono! Kaoru dono!"  
>She opened her eyes and the first thing she saw was a very concerned Kenshin. His hands were on her shoulders shaking her to wake up. "Are you ok?"<p>

She was still in shock… He realized that and gave her some time to calm down.  
>After a while she realized she had a nightmare…"I wake you up… I am sorry." – she passed her hand on her face.<br>"You were having a nightmare." – he replied – "You were screaming." – Kenshin sat next to her.  
>"I am sorry."<br>"That's ok… Do you want to tell me about what it was?" – he crossed his arms around his knees.  
>She shook her head negatively.<br>"Ok." –he replied - "Whatever it was… it was just a nightmare… Try to get some sleep now…" – he said felling helpless… If she didn't wanted to share there was nothing else he could do.  
>She shook her head affirmatively. Kenshin got up and left the room.<p>

Once she was alone again Kaoru decided she wasn't going to sleep anymore… She decided. _  
>I can't stay here anymore.<em>

_:::::::::::::::::::::_

_**So what? An important event took place in this chapter. Kyiosato's death... **  
><strong>Kenshin's troubles are about to begin... Life is never easy for our red-haired samurai...<strong>  
><strong>Did you liked it?<strong>  
><strong>Hope to ear from you soon.<strong>  
><strong>Thanks for reading My Time Machine.<strong>  
><strong>Jou-Chan Himura<strong>_


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6 - A day at town**

She waited until sunrise to get up. She checked her clothes… _They were still wet. I am going to take his clothes…. And later I will find a way to send them back to Kenshin._

Kaoru spent all night thinking of what to do. Should she run away? He offered her his house… but after that dream she became terrified… His eyes… they were what scared her the most…  
>He didn't recognize her… that she was sure. But there was something between them… She couldn't tell exactly what it was, but Kaoru was aware that he felt the same way about her. Maybe it was a connection… he made her feel safe... not totally comfortable, but safe…. So why was she so worried about a stupid dream?<p>

"Kaoru-dono?" – she heard him calling her from inside.  
><em>Well if I wanted to run away… now it's too late. <em>– she thought  
>"I am here!" – she replied – "I was checking my clothes." – Kaoru walked to the porch as Kenshin stepped out – "But they still drench."<br>The raid haired man smiled: "What did you expected? It rained all night."  
>She sighed. Kenshin could sense a bit of anxiety in her. "Is everything ok, Kaoru-dono?"<br>She turned to him. _Why is he asking if I am ok?_ "Yes… But why are you asking?"  
>"You look tense." – he passed her and went to the kitchen - "You haven't sleep, did you?" – she followed him – "I did… not the entire night… but I did sleep maybe four or five hours…"<br>"Because of that nightmare…" - Kenshin opened the cupboard looking for something to cook for them.  
>She gulped – "Partly."<br>"I am sorry Kaoru-dono… I have nothing for us to eat." – he said.  
>"That's ok Kenshin… I am not hungry." – she lied… she was starving.<br>"You are a terrible liar." – he gave her a smile – "I think we should take the breakfast out. I am just going to chop some wood for you to take a warm bath…"  
>"What do you mean? Don't you have to work today?" – she asked surprised with her own tone of happiness… why am I so happy?<br>"Well… Apparently Today my job is you." – his response made her stare at him.  
>"What?"<br>He shook his head: "Katsura asked me to take you to his place tonight. He wants to reward you for saving Sakura and the children."  
>Kaoru stepped back: "I don't need that."<br>"I know you don't, but give him a chance to thank you…" –_ She doesn't realize that by saving those people she was saving herself too… Katsura is so thankful to her that he asked me to protect her… Even thought I would do it even if he didn't ask me to._

"And I thought that maybe you would like to wear something different from my clothes for the dinner tonight."  
>Kaoru looked to herself: "But my clothes still…"<br>"I know." – he interrupted her – "That's why I am telling you we should take the breakfast out so that we can buy you some new clothes too."  
>Kaoru stared at Kenshin: "Buy me clothes?... Kenshin are you going to shop with me?" – she smirked. She couldn't imagine the red-haired man walking in and out of shops with her… he would get tired fast… It's not as if She was the kind of woman who spent almost an hour to decide what to buy… but she was still a woman… and women spend much more time than men when it comes to shopping… And that usually drives men crazy…<br>"Do you think I am not up to the job?" – Kenshin asked not really offended, he was trying to create a relaxed atmosphere around them.  
>"It's not that… I used to shop with Misao and…" – Kaoru abruptly stopped talking remembering of her friend… Remembrances of the last days together came to her mind….<p>

Misao and Sano were always around her showing their preoccupation… Reversing their schedules Trying not to leave her alone for long periods of time… And now… she was here…but... and what about them?

Kenshin realized her humor changed since the moment she remembered someone from her past, but he really wanted to help her, so instead of asking about what mad her so sad, he tried a different approach: "I will prove you that I am a good companionship… "  
>She shook her head and smiled: "It's not that Kenshin… I will love to hang out with you… But… I don't have money to spend… So I think that maybe I should wait until my clothes get dry."<br>He came close to her: "Kaoru-dono, it's not like I am going to let you pay for the dresses!" – he said.  
><em>Why is she so defensive about accepting something from me? Women always accept gifts from men… Usually they are sustained by men… and she is living under my roof so Kaoru will be sustained by me.<em>

On the other hand Kaoru was wondering Why Kenshin seemed so offended? "Kenshin I am not going to be a burden to you." – she tried to explain.  
>He sighed: "You're not. Take your bath and as soon as you finish we leave." – he asked.<br>Kaoru wanted to fight back but ended up nodding. "Yes."

::::::::::::::::::::::::::

**Somewhere in Tokyo**

The girl closed the doors behind her. She was experiencing pain and grief like she had never felt before…  
>He died last night… <em>Murdered..<em>. murdered by the infamous assassin Battousai.  
>Her father words were echoing inside her head. Kiyosato was gone, forever. She would never see him, or hear the sound of her beloved fiancé's voice again.<br>Akira Kiyosato and Yukishiro Tomoe were engaged since last summer. Kiyosato was deeply in love with her, that was clear since they were children, and Tomoe loved him too but she was not the type of woman who shows emotion easily… Misjudging her feelings Akira decided to postpone the wedding until the end of the year… he said he wanted to become stronger to make her proud of him, so, he moved to Kyoto joined the Mimawarigumi and became the bodyguard of Shigekura._ And he got himself killed. –_ She thought –_ Because of me. I was the only one who wasn't able to tell him what I really felt for him… and now he is dead… It's my faul_t…

"She never deserved him!" – she heard a familiar voice crying.  
>"Yamero!" – Another familiar voice – "Nee-chan is suffering too!" - His little brother was defending her from Akira's mother and sisters.<br>But inside Tomoe felt guilt and ashamed. They were right… Her body was so numb… as if her brain was not allowing her to move… A hand rested on her shoulder: "Onee-chan… Don't be like that, please…"  
>She didn't replied or move. Enishi froze: "I can't see you like this… Onee-chan."<p>

Ignoring his brother words, her mind was focused in one thing only:

_ I need to get out of here… I need to do something to prove Akira that I loved him… He was the love of my life… He never knew that in life… Now that he is dead… I need to at least prove him that I would do anything for him… _

_I need… Revenge_.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Kaoru felt miserable comparing herself to the other women that passed by. They were so elegant on their kimonos, Maybe he was right about the dresses… she really needed one.

One thing she found odd was the fact that most of them walked a few steps behind their husbands… She looked at Kenshin on her side… "Why do they walk like that Kenshin?"  
>"It's a tradition… people say that it's a sign of respect…" –he replied looking at her – "Is it the first time you are noticing that kind of behavior?" – he asked intrigued... She was probably eighteen years old and it was the first time she realized that some women walk behind their husbands? It was odd.<p>

"In my country people don't do that." - Kaoru asked a little disappointed with what she thought to be stupid formalities… Would Kenshin want her to act that way too?  
>He lifted his eyebrow: "I assumed you were Japanese… because of your name."<br>She smiled: "No… I was born in Portugal. My grand mother lived in Japan for a few years… and she was the one who choose my name… That's why I have a Japanese name."  
>The samurai nod. <em>´She speaks perfectly Japanese… Like a first language…<em> he stopped walking,  
>She stared at him: "What happened Kenshin? Why did you stop?"<br>He pointed to the shop: "I think that you should come in Kaoru-dono and choose your dress in here."  
>Kaoru looked at the shop window. Her eyes focused on the dark blue kimono at the center of the window. "Wow… that's soo beautiful!" – she exclaimed completely unaware of the people around her.<br>Kenshin just smiled… It was a really beautiful kimono, she was right. "Why don't you try it on?"  
>Her eyes widened when she looked back at him: "Really? Can I try it on?"<br>"Off course Kaoru-dono. If you like it you can wear it tonight…" – Kenshin wanted to laugh at her reaction… she looked like a child receiving a long-expected gift.  
>Kaoru nodded and they came into the shop. She was hesitant… she had never wear something like that before… but as soon as The assistant came to her, Kaoru's hesitation flew away. The woman dressed her up and helped Kaoru with her hair.<p>

As she stared at the mirror Kaoru heard the assistant say:

"You look amazing my lady."

::::::::::::::::  
>Kenshin was waiting for her near to the shop's door.. Although he was the one who told her to go there he felt like a fish out of the water in that situation. Usually women go shopping with their female friends, but he knew Kaoru didn't have anyone else apart from him… and… he smirked, she couldn't go to Katsura's house wearing his hakama…<em> I should ask Sakura to invite Kaoru-dono to shopping along with her…<em>  
>He never took a woman to his place before… But he didn't felt uncomfortable around her… Actually it was a revitalizing feeling to have someone waiting for you to come home…<br>On the other hand Kenshin was apprehensive about tonight's dinner. Not because of Katsura and the other guys, but because of her and Katsura's previous request. The Ishishinshi's head wanted Kaoru to stay in his house along with Sakura and the children._ It's safe for her_- he remembered the man's words - Kenshin did not agree with that… _Sakura was attacked in that same house_… he thought, also he was intrigued about Kaoru and all the secrets she seemed to carry… He wanted to know more about her.  
>Besides, Kenshin couldn't deny he was getting familiar to her.<p>

"Uh..uh.." – she tossed making him look back. Kenshin's eyes focused on her. Kaoru was amazing in that kimono…  
>She turned around herself and smiled: "How do I look Kenshin?"<br>Absorbed by her beauty and surprised of how much it affected him, Kenshin was unable to say a word.  
>Facing his silence Kaoru's smiled faded: "You don't like it…" – she assumed.<br>The red-haired man blinked twice: "No….Kaoru… you just got me off my guard…" – he sighed and smiled: "You are outstanding… "  
>"Are you sure? Or are you just being nice?" – by the way he act it could be one thing or another and Kaoru didn't knew him well enough to be sure.<br>"I am sure." – he came close to her – "You look amazing in that kimono."  
>His words seemed truthful enought to make her blush…<br>After paying for the dress, The samurai offered her his hand and Kaoru gladly accepted. She really needed some support to help her walking because she wasn't acostumated with that kind of sandals.

"Where do you want to go my lady?" – he asked playfully  
>"I don´t know… You are the one who lives here… I am new at the town, remember?"<p>

He couldn't explain why he felt so light near her. Maybe it was because today's job didn't involve blood… Or fighting… or discussing attacks and strategy… No. Today's job was a pleasant one for him. And that's why Kenshin felt lighter.

"First we should eat something, then I am going to show you the town." – he said.  
>"Ok." – Kaoru nod. She didn't felt strange around him anymore. They walked side by side like old friends. Kaoru wanted to ask him about the scar in his left cheek but thought that her question would change his mood, so she left it to other occasion… He seemed happy and she didn't wanted to ruin this moment.<p>

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

He watched his sister gathering her clothes and shook his head. He argued with his father because he didn't allow him to go with her._ Old fool. Does he think he can trap me here_? Enishi already formed a plan and nothing would stop him. He was leaving too, there was nothing left for him if Tomoe wasn't there and besides, what would he do if he stayed? Probably nothing.  
>Maybe she decided to change because she couldn't support the way people glanced at her. Akira's family really made an effort to make things worse by telling everyone that their son's death was caused by his fiancée wishes of a superior life.<br>Enishi hated those people. It was not her fault that he died._ He died because he was weak…_ It didn't bothered him that he would have to leave his friends… He didn't have many anyway. And his father… they really never get well…  
>They were moving to Kyoto, and Enishi hoped that whatever were the reasons that lead his sister there, she could learn how to smile again.<p>

:::::::::::::::::::::::

It had been a pleasant day for them. But as the hours passed Kenshin felt worried about the dinner. He couldn't stop thinking that Katsura's invitation would change the situation between Kaoru and him. In a normal situation he wouldn't think about that, because he would look at Kaoru as a job… But something about her touched deep in his soul. He didn't knew what it was but….  
>"It's so beautiful."<p>

Kenshin looked back. He was so deep in thought that didn't noticed she had stopped walking. "What is it Kaoru-dono?"  
>Her eyes were locked on something: "The sunset." – she answered without looking at him.<p>

Kenshin looked at the sun that was starting to disappear behind one of the town buildings. It was beautiful, yes, but he didn't understood what made Kaoru stop. There was a sunset every day… Unlike other things in life…that you may loose at any second.  
>"It's so beautiful and at the same time sad…" – she groaned<br>He came close to her: "Why?"  
>Kaoru turned his face to him:"Well, we can be in different places… different citys, different countries or different centuries… But the sun… the sun will always be the same. "<br>"And why does that makes you sad?" - Kenshin asked not understanding why she would be gloomy because of the sunset.  
>She looked down and took a deep breath: "Because there was a time that my father used to take me by the hand and we walked all the way from my house to the beach, only to witness the sunset together." – she stopped talking for a while and Kenshin noticed that those images where still fresh in her, and that was sharing her feelings with him, and for some reason we was eager to hear them.<p>

She bit her lip. "He used to tell me that the moon, the stars all the greatest creations, even the sun… we were bigger than them…" – she scratched her head: "No… that's not the word he used, he said… better… yes, we are better than them."  
>"It's a shame that they live longer than us." – Kenshin replied.<br>Kaoru shook her head: "No. That's what made us so special…"  
>He looked at her intrigued. She continued: "We have a short life, that's truth, but, we can appreciate the sunrise and the sunset, we can make wishes upon stars we can stare at the moon and wonder how it would be to live there…" – she gave a shy laugh… "But they are not able do that to us…. They cannot be us… They just do what they are "programmed" to do… " – she crossed her arms in sight of Kenshin's odd look–<p>

"Don't you see Kenshin? We can be the sun on somebody's life… We decide what our life is, if it is a sunny one or not… we have a choice…. They don't… They are there for us… To remember us that it doesn't matter where we are… there's always a bit of home when we contemplate them…" – she puffed.-

The samurai was out of words again. Definitively she had the talent of leaving him speechless. Kenshin smiled: "I see." _Then why is my life so dark? Am I making wrong choices?_

_Why is he so silent? Why does he seem so distant?_ "Are we far from Katsura's place?" – she asked only to make him talk.  
>Apparently It worked, because Kenshin shook his the thoughts away from his mind and started walking again. "No. It's right there." – he said putting his hands inside of his clothes.<br>Kaoru started following him again. After walking for what she thought to be hundred meters, the red-haired man stopped abruptly. Kenshin turned to her with a serious look on his face.  
>"Kenshin?" – his eyes were deep violet and the way he stared at her… it was also deep… As if he was trying to read her mind. But why was he acting so strange? Seemed like we wanted to warn her of something…<br>He was chewing his lip…  
>"Is there something you want to tell me Kenshin? " – she asked worried about his behavior.<br>He sighed and nod his head: "Kaoru… These people… they are…"  
>"Dangerous?" – she asked concerned<br>"Different…" – he replied – "Well… Katsura… he may ask you to stay at his house."  
>Kaoru lifted her eyebrow: "Stay? What do you mean?"<br>"You saved his wife and he wants to compensate you… Also he says that's safer for you to stay there than in my place."  
>Her heart started beating faster: "You are going to leave me here…" – the look of hurt in her face made Kenshin sad but at the same time he was happy to see she wanted to stay with him.<br>He put his hand on her chin and forced her to look at him: "I don't think you should stay… But it's not polite to decline his request." – he answered – "I do not like the idea neither…. And that's why I am trying to convince him that you are safer with me."  
>His words made her heart almost burst from her chest: "Are you?"<br>"Yes." - Kenshin smiled. He didn't had any idea why he was telling her that, but the words just came out from his mouth .  
>"I hope you succeed." – she looked away. She just met him and they were going to be apart? It was unfair. Kaoru knew that somehow she ending there had to meant something and it was related to Kenshin. She needed to find the reason… and she couldn't do it if they were living in different places.<p>

"Kenshin." – they both looked back to see a man, a samurai, waving and smiling to them.  
>When he smiled his eyes closed, and his skin was darker than usual… also he had a strange, almost non-existable mustache. That was for sure an odd man.<br>"I am glad you finally present your friend to us." – he said as he reached them  
>Kenshin didn't replied.<br>"Come on Kenshin, introduce me to the girl!" – he said in face of Kenshin's silence. Kenshin looked at Kaoru and said: "Iizuka, this is Kamyia Kaoru, Kaoru this is Iizuka, he is one of the members Of the Ishishinshi."  
>The other man bent a little but then turned to Kenshin: "I meet you inside."<p>

Kaoru shivered when Iizuka looked at her. He had a cold but empty look on his eyes. For some reason, she didn't liked him…  
>"Lets go inside Kaoru-dono." – he said starting to walk.<br>Forcefully She obeyed and followed him.

::::::

**Sorry for the delay... **

**This one was a little longer but i hope you like it.**

**Jou-chan**

::::::::::::::::


	7. Chapter 7

**Hi! the check speller wasn't working so... sorry if you find grammar mistakes... also, sorry for the delay in this chapter.**

**Hope you to like it.**

**leave your reviews please.**

**Jou-chan**

**Chapter 7 – Hurtful than the Sword**

As they reach the entrance, Kaoru felt her heart beating so fast that for a while, she thought it would came out of her chest. She didn't have enough time to prepare herself for that evening. As soon as they came in, Katsura appeared and complimented them:

"I am so glad you finally accepted our invitation to a dinner." – he put his arm around his wife's shoulder and smiled: "My name is Katsura Kogoro and this is my wife Sakura Kogoro."

"It's nice to meet you. Kenshin talked a lot about you. My name is Kamyia Kaoru." – Some way she managed to disguise her anxiety.

"Let's go inside, there are other people there waiting for us." – he said

Kaoru give a scared look at Kenshin. They were not alone after all. He signaled her to follow the couple and so she did.

AS they get into the dining room Kenshin noticed that Kaoru's fear wasn't baseless. All the important members of Ishinshishi were there: Okubo, Saigo, and some other people were invited for this dinner as well… Katsura wasn't really making things easy for the girl. Kenshin also noticed the looks his companions were giving them… but he knew the reason that made them act that way.

"Hey Shinji" – on of them nudged another on the arm – "This is the first time I see Himura with a girl."

"Yeah, I know." – the other replied – "he seemed so unplugged of that kind of things, and now appears here escorting a flower like that." – he smirked.

"Sounds like he has a heart, after all." – the first one said.

"Oh come on man, with a girl like that, who would be able to resist? Have you seen her looks? That skin must be soft and those lips must be…"

"If I was you I would stop talking about her like that." – Another one said.

"Saigoro, you are always spoiling everything. We were just having some fun. " – Shinji replied

Saigoro was probably the oldest men among the Ishinshishi, he was respected not only by his age but also because of his experience and skills. He was not one of the three leaders, but he was the one they would come to talk to when in need of advisement: "Funny it would be if Kenshin hears what you're saying."

Their faces immediately paled as they pictured that. An angry Himura would mean a lot of trouble… After all there was a reason people called him Battousai.

The old man laugh: "You are incorrigible."

"The problem is if he gets too soft." – Iizuka took a sip of sake. His sentence caused Saigoro to stare at him: "Every men needs something else than war and blood, you should know that."

"That man needs only war and blood." – he didn't took his eyes away from Kaoru – "If he starts thinking too much maybe he ends up leaving us."

::::

"My friends, I joined you all here today with a purpose." – Katsura caught everyone's attention with his sentence – "Everyone here in this room have helped me through many difficult situations." – he looked to each and every one of them as if he was reminding himself of moments those men helped him individually: "In battles against our enemies, in battles for our country, sharing the gaining and the lost… But there Is someone here that stop me from losing the three most important people of my life. And to achieve that she put her own life in danger..."

Kaoru was blushing at every word. She really didn't know how to deal with public compliments. Kenshin on the other side was happy that her bravery was being recognized; also, he was amused seeing her face so red.

Katsura continued: "So, that's why I want Kaoru-san to be treated like family, protected like one of us."

"We already realized that." – another one said – "Otherwise you wouldn't dismissed your personal guard to protect her." Everybody on the room laughed, Katsura as well."Your right Okubo my friend. I dismissed Himura from his job, but it was only for a few days. He is going to be back to active soon."

"Kaoru-san, please, stare at all these man faces… They are going to be a part of your life from now on. They will protect you and treat you as family." – Katsura said looking at her- "Isn't that right?" – he turned to them.

"Hai." – all of them replied.

Kaoru gulped. It was too much attention… Much more than what she was accostumated. "Thank… you." – she managed to say.

"Don't you see you are embarrassing the girl with your speech Katsura?" - Saigo said, which made Kaoru blush more – "I am sure Kenshin is going to take care of her protection, just as he did until now. So Let's just start the dinner?"

Kenshin didn't like the tone he used referring to Kaoru and him, but that was just the way Saigo was. Among the three leaders he was probably the less capable one to the job, but his loyalty to the ideals of the revolution and his family welfare made him an important support to the group.

**:::**

After that, the subject changed to things like battles and situations among them as a group and Kaoru felt happy that she was not in the center of their conversations anymore. But, she couldn't stop feeling uncomfortable. Mainly because of Iizuka stares.

_Why is he looking at me like that? _Kaoru felt like she was the prey and he was the predator… ready to attack her as soon as he had a chance.

"Kaoru-san." – she felt a soft touch on her hand. She met with Sakura's brown eyes: "Sakura-san."

"Would you join me in a walk?" – she asked gently

"Yes." – she looked at Kenshin and as he nod she got up and followed her hoster.

Happy to be away from the dinner room, Kaoru sighed.

"You didn't felt comfortable among all those man." – she simply said as they reached the garden.

Kaoru shook her head ready to deny but Sakura didn't let her: "I totally understand what you felt. Sometimes I feel the same way."

Kaoru bite her bottom lip nervously, she didn't wanted Sakura to think she was being ungrateful: "It's just that I don't know anyone else apart from Kenshin."

"I See." – the other woman said – "I am sure that we will be able to solve that, at least between us. "

Kaoru gave a small smile and nod: "Off course."

She grab Kaoru's hand and mentioned her to follow her: "I want to show you something." – she gave a smile and pushed her inside again, but this time not to the dining room. It was a different compartment. She slide the door to open it: "You can leave now Misako, thank very much." – the maid nod and left quietly.

Sakura and Kaoru kneeled beside the two sleeping children. "They seem so peaceful." – Kaoru said.

She caressed her son's hair: "Yes they are… But the day after the attack they were so scary that I just couldn't put them to sleep… Katsura and I end up taking them to our room." – she sighed remembering their faces... terrified that they might be attacked again.

"I just don't understand how people can be so mean." – Kaoru said looking at them – "They are just children."

Sakura shook her head: "It's because of the war. People put their beliefs above everything else, even from human life."

"War… How do you feel living in the era of war? Must be terrifying." – Kaoru asked. The only things she knew about wars were the ones she was told in school and from her history books.

"It is scary. Mainly because Katsura has an important role in this war. He says he fights for a new era, for freedom, and at the beginning his ideals used to fascinate me, but now… when he is the target of so many attacks… I think differently." – her eyes showed the loneliness her heart felt. – "Sometimes I felt I could receive bad news at any moment, Kaoru, the news of his death."

Kaoru said almost in a whisper: "Must be awful to feel that way."

"Well, since Kenshin appeared I feel Katsura is safer." – she looked at Kaoru – "I insisted with Okubo and Saigo to find him a bodyguard and they appeared with Kenshin." – she remembered the moment she saw him for the first time: "I Thought it was a joke Kaoru… I thought they were crazy to send a child to do a men's job."

"A Child?" – Kaoru inquired. Kenshin wasn't a child, he was probably older than her.

"Kenshin started to work with us at the age of fifteen." – she answered – "It's been five years since then, and Katsura never again came home hurted. Kenshin is probably the most skilled samurai among the Ishinshishi."

Kaoru raised her eyebrow: "Is he that good?"

Sakura gave a shy smile: "For what I heard… he is so fast that his victims don't have the time to scream. "

Kaoru sighed. For what she had witnessed until now, there were two different versions of Kenshin. The first one: The skilled samurai that could engage in a fight with no fear to die or to kill, and second: The kind and gentle Kenshin that uses to be around her. Although she had seen him killing before, she wasn't able to conciliate both of his behavior...

"How can he deal with that?"

"I don't know." – Sakura answered which made Kaoru notice she had asked out loud – "Katsura is also worried about him in that point, he says that he is the best in what he does, but he needs something to take him out of this ugly reality sometimes. Otherwise, someday he will become insane."

Kaoru sadly nod in agreement. It wasn't beautiful to picture Kenshin that way.

She felt soft touch on her hand: "Don't worry; I am sure everything will be alright." Kaoru looked at Sakura's hand on hers. "I don't like to think of Kenshin that way, it pains me."

"You got close to each other, don't you?" – Sakura asked wondering if those last days were enough for feelings to arouse between those two.

"What do you mean?" – Kaoru asked, blushing a little. Sakura smiled freely. Kaoru just couldn't hide, she nurtured feelings for the samurai: "Please don't embarrass me." – she said in a whisper.

"My dear, there's nothing to be embarrassed for." – Sakura said – "It's just natural."

"No it's not. You don't understand… and I don't know how to explain but…" – Kaoru's voice was cut off when she heard the maid calling Sakura. "Yes, What is it?" – the maid came into the room and bowed: "My lady, your husband is requesting your presence and lady Kaoru too."

"Tell him we will be there in a minute." – as soon as she heard Sakura's response she turned and leave.

_These women move so gracefully. – _Kaoru thought as she saw the maid sliding the door.

"You were saying…" –Sakura encouraged her to talk but Kaoru had lost all of her will when she noticed they needed to come back to the dining room.

"Never mind… your husband is waiting for you." – she excused herself

Sakura got up: "I only let you go without an explanation because I know we are going to have more days like these to talk." – she gave Kaoru a comforting smile, she smiled back: "Thank you for listening."

They were about to leave when Sakura hugged her. Kaoru was caught off guard with her gesture. "Thank you so much for what you did the other night." – she said still hugging her.

"There's nothing to be thankful for Sakura." – Kaoru replied. Sakura stared at her as she continued talking: "I also want to thank you for sending Kenshin after me, you didn't realized, but you were helping me… and your kindness for inviting me for this dinner."

Sakura smiled and grab Kaoru's hand: "You're always welcome here."

Kaoru smiled back: "Thank you."

:::::

"Himura, in my opinion Kaoru should stay here for protection." – Katsura said looking at the samurai – "But by the look on your face I see you don't share my opinion."

Kenshin tossed: "Kaoru-dono is new here in Japan, and she is not accostumated to live in a dangerous country in war like we do. Her naiveté's and innocence would kill her if she is left alone."

"But I am not thinking of leaving her alone, she could stay here with Sakura." – Katsura replied clarifying the plans he made for her.

"I think Sakura-san and Kaoru should be friends, it would be good for both of them." – Kenshin wanted some solid argument to convince Katsura – "But, I think that, at least for now, she should stay at my place."

Katsura wondered why Kenshin was insisting in that idea, he thought that the red-haired man would be glad to let Kaoru there, but the samurai seemed over-protective about that girl. The Ishinshishi leader didn't understood why, but made no comment about it.

"Kaoru may come here during the times I am out, working." – Katsura's silence was a sign that he was thinking about his offer – "But when I am done from my job, I think she is safer by my side."

"I see." – the other said with a small smile appearing on his lips. He finally understood what was stopping Kenshin from leaving the girl there, but once again he said nothing about that.

::

Both women stepped out of the room and when they reached the dinning room only Kenshin and Katsura where there : "What happened to the others?" – Sakura asked.

Kaoru walked till Kenshin's side relieved that everyone else seemed to have disappeared. Kenshin noticed that and smiled back. That didn't go unnoticed to Katsura and Sakura who exchange glances. "They left." – Katsura answered

"I think that is our turn to leave." – Kenshin mentioned to Kaoru. She nodded.

After a while they said goodbye to their hosters and where on their way back home.

:::

As they walked home together Kenshin thinks on how beautiful she is that night. That kimono intensified her natural beauty and matched her eyes. Although her young age, Kaoru was already a very attractive woman. The samurai also reflected about how peaceful that day was, no killing, no blood spilling… just her… her and her smile, he could live like that forever, but...part of him knew that was just an illusion. He was an hitokiri and his life could never be apart from the sword, and that means he would have to carry the weight of the lives he takes each day.

"Kenshin?" – her soft voice chase his demons away. He looked at her, she wanted to ask him something, so he let her proceed: "Sakura told me you are a skilled samurai." – she remembered the woman's words – "Don't you ever feel afraid?" Kenshin lifted his eyebrow, but she continued: "I mean… Every time you engage in a fight your life is at risk, aren't you afraid of… " – Kaoru was trying to find a nicest word than the one on her mind…

"Death?" – Kenshin completed her question. _She wants to know what I feel, could that mean that she is beginning to worry about me? – _it was nice to feel that someone cared - _Don't be stupid, she is probably just curious… _ "Dying doesn't scare me anymore Kaoru-dono."

"What does?" – her immediate question made him stop to think. Think about the reasons that lead him into this kind of live, the deep desire he had but he never fulfilled.

"Not being able to protect the people I love." – she stopped walking but he didn't, her question brought many sad memories to his mind, his sisters, his master, the first life he took and unconsciously the last one too… No…. this was being the most peacefully day of his life in five years, it shouldn't be spoiled by memories like that…

"Let's not talk about that Kaoru, please." – he turned back to her. "Kaoru-dono what happened?" – he gasped when he saw her so pale and her eyes so open in what he sensed to be fear. She only pointed: "Kenshin, behind you." - She mumbled.

He didn't need to turn. There were three men behind him and all of them had a fighting spirit.

He was so distracted with his own thoughts that he missed their presence. "I am sorry." now she would have to see him killing. Kenshin cursed and turned to them trying to find the best position to shield her and also be able to fight them._._

They all ran to him with their swords unsheathed. _I am a monster… That will never change. she will hate me forever after this. _

Kaoru wanted to scream for help but numbness took over her vocal cords and she wasn't able to say a word, her knees weakened and she fell on the floor. Also, everything happened so fast, almost in a blink of an eye, that the only thing she noticed was three bodies lying lifeless on the ground and the poll of blood that she was sitting in.

_What happened? Did he killed them? I haven't seen his moves… how can he move so fast? _ - she looked at Kenshin trying to understand what just happened there, but he avoided eye contact with her...

After a while he found the courage to talk: "I am sorry. I didn't want you to witness this." – he said turning to her. The look on her eyes showed fear and repulsiveness. "You must think I am a monster." – he came close to her expecting her to step back in fear but she remained in the same position, staring at the bodies of the men he killed. Kenshin lend her his hand to help her got up and only then he realized she was trembling. He pulled her up and Kaoru hugged him tightly still shaking with fear.

Caught off guard with her gesture Kenshin let his sword slipped from his hand. She was embracing him? No one did that in more than ten years. He placed a hand on the back of her head and the other around her back: "Kaoru?" he felt she became heavier after a while and realized she had fainted.

Kenshin immediately pick her up and took her home in his arms.

::::::::::::::::::

White. That was all she saw.

_Am I dead? _She thought. _I am not dead because Kenshin protected me, he killed those men to protect me. _

"…Please…"

_Where am I? _

"… We need you…"

Kaoru was trying to focus on what happened but something wasn't allowing her to do it properly. It was those words… it looked like someone was talking to her... whispering…praying…

"Kaoru…"

She was sure she heard her name. Someone was really talking to her, but it wasn't Kenshin's voice, it was a woman's voice. She tried harder to comprehend those words and after a while it became clear to her who was the owner of that voice.

_Misao!_

"I know that things had been difficult to you Kaoru… But you can't give up." – It was Misao she was sure. Sadness and melancholy filled her heart … how she missed her friend. "You're gone for almost a week now."

_Misao! I am not gone!_

"Sano is worried too… he doesn't say anything, he tries to play strong, but it pains him to see you like this, lying in this hospital bed, just as much as it pains me."

_Hospital Bed?_ – Kaoru felt an urgent need to scream. What in the world happened to her.

"The doctor says you're in a coma. Everything in your body seems to be fine, it's your mind which Is stopping you from awaking up." – her voice trembled. She was crying. Her friend was crying and asking her to wake up. Kaoru was listening everything she was saying but it didn't matter how hard she tried, she couldn't talk or move.

"We miss you so much… Please… please Kaoru come back to us."

_But I am right here Misao! _

"I need to get back to school now. I come back tomorrow, I promise." – she heard her say.

_No wait, Misao! Misao!_

"MISAO!"

**:::**

_She is having a nightmare. – _Kenshin assumes that by the way she desperately tries to talk and move in her sleep. _It is all because of me. _

He stares at her clothes… her beautiful kimono was now dirty with blood.

"Kaoru" – he called her name but it didn't make any difference she was too far from his voice's reach. Incapable of seeing her in such pain he holds her hand firmly and says her name again: "Kaoru" Her free hand flew to him as she grabbed his. "Kaoru" – he tried to wake her up again, but once again he failed.

Tears start falling from her eyes and unconsciously Kaoru grab his hand with both hers. Even uncertain of what he was doing Kenshin hold her close to his chest and tries to comfort her."Shhh… everything is ok, Kaoru…" It had an immediate effect, because when she felt a familiar presence, Kaoru calmed down. He felt glad… At least he had managed to send her nightmares away.

He stood that way with her for a while. This house has never been so full and so peaceful at the same time.

_How long has been since the last time I felt peace like this? _– he wondered. _With simple touches this girl brought back pieces of serenity to my life, But everything around her seems a mystery… why do I feel so compelled to her? _Kenshin stared at her sleeping features … Innocence… she was the innocence someone took away from him. _Which you spoiled by killing those men in front of her. _Feeling unworthy of having her so close to him, like he could tainted her with his 'disease', Kenshin gently tried to create a distance between them. He started by untangling his fingers from hers. _I don't have the right to feel this kind of things towards someone like her. It is better if I…_

"Kenshin?" – he stared at her open eyes looking directly at his. "What happened?" – she asked rubbing her eyes, her vision still foggy.

"You fainted outside." – he simply answered avoiding to look her in the eye. She noticed his odd behavior: "Well, you seem to become an expert saving me."

"What do you mean?" – he asked surprised with her light mood.

She shrugged her shoulders: "By my count, this is the second time I faint and you carry me all the way back home."

"I couldn't let you there." – he replied. – "After all, my actions were the reasons that lead you into fainting. If it wasn´t because of me, we were having a totally peaceful night and…"

"Kenshin, stop it. I am not blaming you, am I?"

"No… You're too kind to do that… but also you don't need to… my guilt is spoiled all over your clothes." – the tone of his voice showed how sick he was with that situation, and she was sure that if he could change his actions he would, because regret was written all over his face.

Kaoru stared at herself. Her once blue kimono was now stained with red spots all over it. "Oh."

Kenshin shook his head feeling even more miserable: "You probably hate me now." – he got up and walked to the other side of the room, his face to the wall. He wasn't able to deal with the sad look she would probably had in her eyes.

There was a minute of silence while Kaoru was trying to understand why he seemed to worried about her clothes: "Don't be silly Kenshin. Clothes can be cleaned."

"Don't lie Kaoru. I know you loved that kimono." – he said still not facing her.

"Yes I did." – she got up and came close to him – "But the main reason I liked this kimono it's because of the person who gave it to me."

Kenshin closed his eyes and sighed. Was she being honest? "You can't be serious… after what you saw tonight…" – he turned himself to her.

"I am." – Her answer was truthful as her eyes showed him. "It was a gift from you, we bought it together, and that's what made it so special." – she looked at her clothes again – "It could be torn down, destroyed, tainted, but if you are safe" – she put her hand on his chin forcing him to look at her – "That's what matters to me."

Her words had a deep impact in him. For a while he thought his heart stopped beating and no words came out from his mouth. She let him speechless, once again… He caressed her face and she closed her eyes feeling his touch.

"Arigato Kaoru-dono."

"I don't like to see you sad, Kenshin..." - she opened her eyes – "Please."

"It's not a happy task to be a murderer Kaoru-dono." – he replied his fingers tracing her lips.

Maybe that was the reason he called her here… "Do you ever felt happiness in your life Kenshin?"

He sighed: "I did when I was a child…" – he said remembering his life back in their farm – "But my parents died from a disease when I was eight years old, and I was sold as a slave."

Kaoru gasped. How could someone be so heartless to sell a child instead of taking care of him?

"I wasn't the only one, my all village was destroyed and everyone was sold as a slave, including my three sisters." – Kenshin remembered the girls he called sisters – "They were not my blood family, but we treated each other like we were. When some assassins appeared in our way to the town and killed everyone, because I was the only boy in the group I felt that my job was to protect them, and I tried… I swear Kaoru-dono I tried… but that sword was so heavy and…" – Kenshin filled his chest with air before continuing: "I failed and they end up giving their own lives to protect me."

Kaoru hand flew to her mouth.

He didn't knew why in the world he was telling her that, but his heart seemed lighter as he did it: "Then, when there was no else left to kill except me, a man appeared and saved me from the assassins… this man took over me and raised me as a son, teaching me the art of the sword… teaching me HitenMitsurugi. "

Kaoru took a step forward and hugged him.

_His parents died when he was just a child, then all the people he knew were slaughtered in front of him, three of them died trying to protect him… _"Kenshin, you learnt how to fight because you wanted to be able to protect the people you know..."

"I Wanted to protect the ones who have no strength to protect themselves, the weak ones…like me as a child." – he bit his bottom lip – "But I ruined it all."

"Why?" – she gave a step back in order to look at his face.

"When this war started, I was tired of seeing people being abused by the ones in command, I wanted to do something to help them... I wanted to use my sword to save them." – Kenshin opened his hands and stared at them: "My master warned me that the sword is a tool to kill… And that if I choose a side to fight for, I would become an Hitokiri, just like the ones I hated so much. But I was stubborn, so I run away and joined the Ishinshishi."

"And things didn't happen as you planned." – she sighed. His wish of saving people became his nightmare. "This is not far."

"Life is not far, Kaoru-dono." – he looked at her – "Never was." – he walked away from her.

"Kenshin!" – he heard her calling him, but he continued walking, he felt good to tell her all that, but it didn't changed the fact that every time he looked at her kimono it reminded him of what happened that night. "You made a mistake, but you're in time to emend it!" – he stopped and turned back to her. Kaoru shook her head: "Stop it, stop fighting."

"What?" – he widened his eyes.

She came close to him: "You hate to kill… So, give up on this job."

She made it sound like it was easy. She wanted him to give up on Katsura? Give up from the man he swore to protect? For an instance he got mad. How could she think that things were so easy?

"You know nothing about me!" – he said in a rash tone.

Those words hurt her. She was trying to help him and he was refusing her help: "You're right. I know nothing about you." – she was about to turn around and leave but then something came to her mind… she needed to say this or on contrary she wouldn't be able to sleep. Kaoru took a deep breath and turned to face him:"I know you well enough to realize that every time you kill someone a part of you die… That sword right there on your hips…" – she pointed "Will became your death if you go on like this… and I am not talking about losing your life in battle…" – she continued facing his expression of disbelief – "I am talking about the loss of your soul." – Then she got out from the room and went to the outside leaving a puzzled samurai behind.

_The loss of my soul… Am I losing my soul? _

Kenshin took his sword from the shelter and stared at the image on it. It reflected his face… his amber eyes… dreadful eyes. Since when he stopped being that children that wanted to save the world to became… _Battousai?_

He ran to the outside and searched for her. Kaoru was sitting on the porch looking at the sky. When she saw him approaching she wiped her tears away.

"I am sorry. My rudeness made you cry." – he said feeling even more miserable. She didn't replied and turned his face to the other side. Kenshin kneeled beside her: "Please Kaoru-dono, forgive me."

She turned to him. Her eyes were still red from crying: "What you do with your life Kenshin it's none of my business."

He shook his head: "That's why what you said right now had an effect right here." – he put his hand on the left side of his chest – "My life is not an issue to you… still you are the only one who seems to care about me… without asking anything in return."

She gave him an odd look: "I just… don't like to see you sad… What's so strange about it?"

Kenshin smiled: "Nothing…It's just that I am not… accostumated to have someone caring for me."

Kaoru blushed and turned her face away.

After what she thought to be ten minutes of silence, he decided to talk: "What you saw tonight… I am concerned about the effect that it may have on you."

"That's ok… I am not that fragile, besides I saw nothing it was all too fast for my eyes to capture…." – she answered still upset with him.

"You saw enough to give you nightmares." – he immediately replied.

"What nightmares?" – Kaoru wondered what he was talking about.

He sighed:"Don't pretend you're strong… I was at your side in the room, I know you was having a nightmare."

She laughed: "I was having a nightmare… but what makes you think that I was dreaming about… that?"

He shrugged his shoulders: "I assumed…" – she didn't let him finish - "Seriously wrong Mr. Samurai… I have my own issues."

"Tell me." – he sat next to her – "Help me to feel less miserable."

She shook her head: "I was dreaming about a friend of mine… Misao…"

"Do you miss your friends?" – He wanted to know more about her life besides him and the occasions to talk like this were so rare.

"I Miss them a lot…" – the sadness in her tone show how truthful her words were – "They're family."

Kenshin encouraged her to talk: "How was your life, back in your country?"

She stared at the stars for a while before answering: "Misao and Sano are my friends since we were kids. We grew up together. Our parents used the call us the triplets." – a smile appeared on her lips – "Misao used to come to my house every day to pick me up and we met Sano halfway… we went to school together. We protected each other like family…" – her arms crossed around her knees – "I miss Misao's Energy and Sano's jokes… I miss the sound of their voices calling my name, the warmth of their embraces… I miss everything about them." – she sighed – "When my parents died, they took care of me, went to the hospital, helped me with the funeral, stood at my house after school so I wouldn't feel lonely."

It was obvious that those people were very important to her."What is the last thing you remember about them?"

She thought for a while: "Sano was at my place before leaving to school… I remember he made me promise that I would do everything to get better as soon as possible… Then he went away, I took my pills and went to the attick." – she remembered that moment clearly, she was feeling miserable looking at all the inventions her father kept on that attic, especially that 'time machine' – "Then, I felt a huge pain on my chest, I thought I was about to die." – Automatically her hand flew to her chest – "I think I fainted… and when I woke up I was next to Sakura's house."

Kenshin stared at her in disbelief: "Do you think someone took you here? All the way from your country to here? That would take months, and you would remember!"

She sighed: "It doesn't make sense, I know… But it's all I can remember."

There was silence again. Kenshin was wondering if there was any chance that she could be lying. _No… she is not lying… she's probably just confused… or maybe she hit her head and lost part of her memory. _On the other side, Kaoru was wondering if he would think that she was crazy. _I would if I was in his place. – _she thought.

"I would give everything to have a life like the one you had, Kaoru-dono." – he said out of the blue. She stared at him. Kenshin seemed to be deep in thoughts. She could understand that compared to his life hers would seem a joy. But what he didn't know was that since she was a child she suffered for not being able to help the red-haired man in her dreams… He.

"I always sensed something was missing." – she didn't realized she gave voice to her words

Her expression called his attention. What would someone with that kind of life miss? She had family and friends that cared for her. "Did you found out what was missing Kaoru-dono?"

She blushed with his stare:"Uhh… Partly…" – Kaoru gulped: "Actually…I don't know."

**::::**

**NEXT DAY**

"I am so happy Kenshin brought here. Seems like you're going to spend some time together from now on." – Sakura said as they entered her room.

"Yes… I am glad to." – she sat next to Sakura – "I hate to be alone."

Sakura smiled: "Kenshin told me you need new clothes." – she said realizing Kaoru was wearing Kenshin clothes.

Kaoru looked at herself: "My kimono is dirty... But I don't want to bother you with that."

"Bother me?" – Sakura got up and walked next to the closet and slide the door open. "Since when shopping is something that bothers me, or any women?" They both start laughing.

Sakura shook her head: "When I was your age I loved this kimono, but now I think if fits better in someone younger…" Kaoru was about to refuse but she didn't let her: "No Kaoru... please accept… I want to do this for you."

Kaoru gave up. "Thank you." – and looked at the kimono. It was silk, the pattern was light pink with some shades of black. It was beautiful, not as much as the one Kenshin gave her, but it was beautiful as well.

"Dress it up, I want to see how you look in it." – she asked exited.

Kaoru took off her clothes and Sakura helped her dressing the new ones. Meanwhile:

"Does Kenshin treats you right?"- Sakura's question sounded senseless to Kaoru: "Off course. But why are you asking?"

Katsura's wife picked up the gi to put around Kaoru's waist: "I never saw him with a girl before… so I was wondering if he knows how to deal with women." – she stepped back to have a better look on her: "You know, we are a complicated kind." – she smiled – "I think it fits you perfectly."

Kaoru stared at the reflection in the mirror. It really fitted her, but with those clothes she seemed a different person. "Elegant." – Sakura spun around her searching every detail. Kaoru smiled: "Thank you once again."

_Elegancy… yes off course… that doesn't sound like me._"And… in what concerns to Kenshin…" – she added – "He is a gentleman."

"As far as I know, he did everything he could in order for you to stay in his house." – that made Kaoru blush. She was the only one who knew the real motifs… he didn't wanted her to feel uncomfortable.

"Kenshin is very Kind." – Kaoru turned her back to the mirror. _Too kind to have a life like this…_

"Why do I feel a touch of sadness in your voice?" – He didn't pass unnoticed to her… With time and because of all the people she knew, Sakura learnt how to read between lines… she could realize when someone was trying to hide or disguise something… she was accostumated to deal with people that kept many secrets and Kaoru… was almost an open book.

Kaoru looked at her uncertain if she should tell her or not… But last night's events were still in her mind. The sadness in his voice, the pain in his eyes as he remembered everything that happened in his past… and his present… "Because he is a good person… and I wanted so much to see him happy…" – Kaoru sighed.

"And you think he is not?" – her question made Kaoru even more uncertain if she would tell her or not. _She is Katsura's wife… I can't tell her what I think he feels when he kills someone, after all, is her husband the responsible of Kenshin's job._

"I don't know." – Kaoru answer didn't satisfied her curiosity, but still, she asked nothing else. Last night she and Katsura talked about these two as a couple. And they agreed that Kaoru could be the best thing that happened to Kenshin in all these years. _His shield. _She remembered her husband's words about the role he thought she could have in the red-haired samurai's life.

Sakura applied some powder in her cheeks while thinking. _I am going to help them… Just a little… But for that: _"We need to do some shop, Kaoru."

Kaoru raised her eyebrow: "Now?"

The other took her by the arm and practically dragged her: "Yes, now. Women day!"

**::**

As they walked together to the meeting in Okubo's house Katsura thought about the plans for the day Sakura had share with him.

"Seems like our women are going to have a pleasant day together." – he said to the samurai on his right side.

He caught him off guard. Kenshin eyes widened in surprise and he could swear he almost saw a smile appearing on Kenshin's lips, but, for some reason his man of thrust didn't wanted to admit his feelings: "Kaoru-dono is not my woman."

"But you wished her to be, didn't you?" – The leader went further on the conversation.

Kenshin stared at Katsura, he never had this kind of conversation with him before:"Although her young age Kaoru-dono is a very smart woman… but she is also sweet and innocent." – Kenshin shook his head: "Combining that with my kind of life" – he wasn't blaming Katsura, since the first moment Kenshin choose to be a member of Ishinshishi, he never hide him that he would have to kill in order to achieve their goal – liberty. "I have nothing to offer her."

"That is something she will have to decide by herself." – They could already see Okubo's house by far, surrounded with guards. Katsura stopped walking and stared at Kenshin: "You can offer her anything you want, besides… this life, as you call it, is not going to last forever. As soon as the war is over and people get free from this political chains… you will have your so desired… peaceful life Himura, and that I promise."

Kenshin sighed. He knew the man's intentions were the best… but he had heard this speech too many times before… besides… something else was bothering him.

"What's the matter Himura?" – Katsura asked as they started walking again.

Kenshin shook his head: "What do you mean?"

"I know when something is bothering you…" – he replied

"I am worried about Kaoru." – he end up saying – "And about her reaction when she discovers that they are being followed by two of our men."

Katsura laughed: "But you gave the idea yourself… you said it was for their protection!" – Kenshin's confused look made him laugh even harder: "I don't believe this… you face dangerous enemies without hesitation, but when it comes to a harmless girl…"

Kenshin let a small smile appear on lips… as they kept walking towards Okubo's place Katsura was still trying to control his impulsive laughing.

_Who would say Battousai's worst fear is… a woman?_

**::::**

These meetings were long enough to leave Kenshin bored. They were discussing about Shinsen gumi, and their ideals of protecting the people. Okubo said that they claim to do that, but their real intentions were hidden, because they attacked Saigo's place last evening. Saigo took the word and explained that this group seemed different from the one they faced before, they were stronger and organized.

"There was this guy…" – Saigo remembered – "I think they called him Haijime, his style of fight… I've never seen anything like that."

"Do you think he will be a problem?" – Okubo asked. Last evening attack left them with less people.

"If he is a problem?" – Saigo asked irritated – "He killed ten of my best men, what do you call that?"

"Don't forget the crazy one… Jin-hei." – one of the man that fought the attack said

"I am not worried about Jin-hei. We can handle him… Haijime Saito is worst in many manners." – Katsura said – "I've heard of him. He is their Captain."

Kenshin got a mental note of that name.

"Skin and Tall, amber eyes, long black hair… Mibu Wolf… actually that's his nickname." – he turned to Kenshin – "I want you to focus on him if we end up fighting them."

He nod. So the next target was on the table.

:::::::::::::::::::

After a long day of work Kenshin was longing to see her. But when they arrived the girls weren't home yet. The men they had sent to secretly watch over them looked at them confused: The old one said: "Sorry Sir, but they entered in a shop and never came out, after an hour we decided to check if everything was ok but they weren't there anymore. We search the town but couldn't find them."

Kenshin was stressing out. Where were they? How was it possible for two trained man to lose them of sight like this?

"Sakura does this sometimes." – Katsura put a hand on his forehead – "And she knows I hate it."

"I am going after them." – Kenshin was about to leave when he heard their voices.

The two of them were probably having a funny conversation because they were laughing. Sakura looked in front and saw them waiting at the entrance: "Ok… I'll explain everything." – she raised her hands. Kaoru on the other side was confused, why was she acting like this?

"You know that I hate when you do this." – Katsura told her, with an apprehensive tone on his voice.

Sakura passed Kenshin: "It's not her fault, she didn't knew."

Kenshin looked at Kaoru to verify the authenticity of her answer and the puzzled look at Kaoru's face made him realize she knew noting. The red haired samurai walked towards her: "Let's go home."

Kaoru nod, happy that the moment to be with Kenshin just arrived.

Katsura dismissed the two men he sent to follow them and before Kaoru said goodbye to Sakura, she and Kenshin started walking home together.

"How was your day?" – he asked – "I see you got yourself a new kimono."

Kaoru smiled: "Sakura gave it to me… I tried to refuse but she insisted… at least she didn't have to spend money to buy it. It used to belong to her but she doesn't use it anymore…"

"I see." – _So if they didn't buy anything why did they go out for? _"Did you enjoy your day?" – he asked hoping she would disclose some information.

"Yes…" Kaoru thought about the shops they went to but mainly about the woman she met that day – "We went to a restaurant named Ake and met a woman named Yumi… she and Sakura are friends."

_That's why Sakura didn't want be followed by the guards… _Kenshin thought. "I see." – he simply answered.

Noticing his thoughts were far from there Kaoru said: "If you're not interest in knowing how my day was then you shouldn't have asked!"

Surprised with her abrupt reaction Kenshin tried to explain, he put his hand on her shoulder: "I am sorry if I gave you the wrong impression." – he stop walking and looked at her. Kaoru crossed her arms waiting for an answer: "I want to know how your day was, I just didn't like what Sakura did."

"Actually I don't understand what happened" – she remembered the moment they arrived to Sakura's house: "Why Katsura seemed so mad and why you had that look of worry all over your face."

Kenshin sighed. _Naïve. _"Katsura asked two of his men to follow you…" – she didn't let him finish

"WHAT? WHY?" – Kaoru stared at him in disbelief

Kenshin raised his hands: "Wait… it's not what you're thinking, it's only for your protection… Everybody knows who she is and to avoid that someone may try to hurt her… "

Kaoru nod in agreement: "I see." – _Her husband's fear is not unfounded counting on what happened in the night we met – _"But why were they hiding?"

"Because she doesn't like being followed." – Kenshin finally stood in silence for a while. Thinking about her new friend: "You know… she is always worried about her husband too."

"But that's why I am there, to protect Katsura. She doesn't have to be worried all the time." – he replied. Kaoru growled: "It's not that simple. Knowing that you can defend yourselves it's not enough for us to feel calmer!"

He stopped walking. She just said _us_?

Kenshin wasn't sure, but was she referring to him too?

Unaware of his thoughts she continued: "You men will always think the same way. But your forget the ones who wait in tenterhooks to see you arrive home safe… it doesn't matter if you're strong enough to protect yourselves… " – she turned to him – "when we like people, we worry about them… it's not possible to tell our hearts to stop worrying… at least, I can't."

Kenshin was blazed with her words. Was she talking only about Sakura? For a moment he thought she was talking about her own preoccupations…

"Why are you staring at me like that?" – she asked, hands on her hips… his silence was killing her.

He smiled vaguely: "Nothing…" – he started walking again – "I was just wondering…" – he stopped next to her – "It must feel good to have someone caring for us the like way Sakura cares for him."

Kaoru's eyes looked away from him. All those words… for nothing. _Don't you see your fool? I care!_

"Come" – he offered his hand – "Let's go home."

Deep inside of his heart Kenshin knew she cared. But he was still unable to decide if he should accept her love because he felt he had nothing to give back to her. _Don't lie to yourself! You know you love her! She appeared in your life only two weeks ago… _Kenshin's consciousness seemed to be gaining force on his own._ And… are you prepared to let her go? _

_What can I possibly offer her? _ - he asked himself

_Yourself! What else could you offer to her!_

_A murderer? A man whose nickname his connected to how fast he kills? She deserves someone better than me._

_These are only excuses. You never wanted so much to arrive home before, like you do since the day she appeared in your life. You long to see her…_ the voice in his head replied

Involuntarily, images of her appeared in his mind: _I long to see her smile when I came home, I long to see the happy look on her eyes when she sees me… it makes me feel… less monster than what I actually am. _

_I see you got yourself an answer… - _Kenshin's conscious voice said.

Oblivious to the inner conflict Kenshin was experiencing Kaoru accepted his hand and started walking.

"Kenshin?" her voice woke him of his thoughts.

"Uh? Yes Kaoru-dono"

"I was wondering…" – she was measuring her words – "Do you mind… if I… get a job?"

"A job?" – his voice failed with the unexpected question from her part. He tossed: "I mean… Why?"

"To keep me occupied." – her answer was logical.

Kenshin sighed: "Kaoru, I know that it must be boring to be alone all day, but now, you have Sakura."

She shrugged her shoulders:"I am not going to stay with Sakura everyday Kenshin, also I want to feel useful."

"In my opinion, Sakura doesn't think that way… She was happy to know that you two were spending much time together…" – Kenshin hoped his words could hide the fear growing inside of him_… Fear? Of what? _

"Oh no." – she said with a smile – "You know, when we went to the restaurant today and Yumi told us she needed a person to work there at day-time she suggested me."

Kenshin felt an irritation increasing inside. How dare Sakura suggest HIS Kaoru to work on place like that? "She can't make any decisions for you!"

_Why does he seems so mad? _"But she didn't Kenshin! She only suggested that in our way back home… not in front of Yumi." – she tried to calm him down.

"You're not going to work there!" – he shouted.

"Why?" – she asked frustrated

"Because I don't want to!" – Kenshin was trying to push away all the images of Kaoru in that place.

Kaoru crossed her arms: "You don't command me Kenshin!"

"You're not going to work at that place! There is no turning back on that matter!" – he shouted deeply irritated with himself for not being able to explain his real reasons to her.

Mad with him and sad because of the strange way he was acting Kaoru step up the pace and reached his house before Kenshin. She went straight to 'her' room and close the door before her.

He stood behind thinking of how to deal with this new situation. Kaoru was too naïve and too young to work in such place. She would be easily deceived and forced to do things she didn't want to. And this was what he feared most. But how could he explain that to her? How would he, a man, tell her that Yumi was a famous gueixa and the reason Sakura escaped from the guards was because she knew Katsura disliked their friendship? Although gueixas were respected by most of men, that didn't change the fact that he didn't wanted that kind of live for Kaoru. Would she understand his preoccupations?

The red-haired man walked to the door's room. There was silence on the inside but he could feel her sad energy… she was sad but also mad at him. Probably she was right… he should have acted differently but when it comes to Kaoru, he feels overprotective… "Kaoru we need to talk."

The honorific was left aside, and that was the first time since they met Kenshin called her only by her name.

"Will you listen to me?" – her voice asked from the inside.

Kenshin slid the door open. She was sitting on the floor, back against the wall and arms around her knees.

"I will. But If, it's not too much to ask," – he step inside and closed the door behind him – "I beg you to listen to me first."

Obviously he was calmer than before. She nodded. He sat next to her and took a deep breath: "Ake it's not only a restaurant… and Yumi… she is not only the owner of that place." – he turned to her – "She is a gueixa. She and Sakura met years before she married Katsura."

"A gueixa?" – Kaoru's eyes widened in surprise.

"Yes. During the day that place is nothing more than a restaurant, but at night… it is different." – he shrugged his shoulders "I have nothing against her choice's for life… but I don't want that for you Kaoru." Flattered with the concern he showed for her she felt that staying mad at him wasn't an option:

"Now that you speak… I noticed that Yumi was the only one wearing expansive clothes and make up… all the other girls that work there are just like me." – she said remembering the cleavage on her kimono and the red lipstick the gueixa used. She turned to him: "But all I want is an occupation Kenshin… I can work on the kitchen and wait on the tables…"

"I don't know." – he sighed – "I don't like the idea of you being associated with that place…" – he tilted his head back massaging his temple.

"I don't care what people think, Kenshin." Kenshin stared at her: "But I do. Not about what they say but about your reputation!" – he put his hand on her chin: "I care for you..."

A smile appeared on her lips: "do you?" her smile melted his heart: "Off course I do." – he looked away: "Much more than what I should… for your own good." - Kenshin was ready to get up but she didn't let him: "What do you mean with that?"

Kenshin sighed. He already spoke too much: "I… care for you in a different way…" – _How am I going to say this? _"Every day I feel anxious to arrive home and see you safe." He shook his head – "I know it's not fair for you to stay at Katsura's place everyday… but

"Am I being a burden to you Kenshin?" – that was all she didn't wanted to be.

Kenshin felt frustrated …. She didn't understand… " It's hard for me to entrust your safety to anyone else besides me." – he finally spoke.

Her eyes widened and she opened her mouth to speak: "I… I do care for you in the same way." – she blushed – "The difference is that I can't protect you back….like you do to me."

That image of her was outstanding. She made his heart experience a feeling like he never did before. It was a mix between anxiety and happiness… he was so happy to hear about her feelings for him but also anxious because he didn't knew how to act next. Kenshin caressed her cheek: "You don't realize how much you do." – he kissed her forehead and looked at her in the eye again– "Are you sure you want a tainted man like me to protect you?"

_Why is he always carring this guilt with him? It must be horrible to live with such huge remorse – _she thought_. _"No." – her answer made him step back. What was she doing? She refused his protection, his care? Kenshin looked away: "I see." – his sad tone almost made her heart break.

"Kenshin, look at me!" – she cupped his face on her hands forcing him to look at her – "You asked me if wanted a tainted man like you to protect me, right?" – he nod and she smiled: "And I say to you again: No. I don't want a man like you to protect me" –tears formed in her eyes… these days together showed her that he was the reason she was there, and if she needed to lose her previous life to stay with him… to hell with everything else! He was above all the rest: " I want a man like you to love me."

For a while he felt they stopped in time. Her words echoed in his head:

_A man like you to love me…._

_Love me…_

_ I want you to love me Kenshin._

"Kenshin?" – the urgency in her voice woke him up. He was confronted with her scrutinizing blue eyes.

Silence…

She just opened her heart to him and the samurai didn't say a word! He felt he had lost the ability to talk: "Kaoru." - he tasted her name.

_I said too much… I shouldn't have told him… I acted too forward… what is he going to think of me now?_ "I am sorry Kenshin I shouldn't have said…" – she turned around anxious to break eye contact with him.

"Kaoru." – he grabbed her arm – "Wait." . she was too embarrassed to look at him, and Kenshin didn't forced her: "I am sorry for my silence." – his hand move down till hers – "It's just that, before you… no one had ever said words like that to me."Slowly she turned to face him. "And Kaoru… I don't want to hear them from anyone else neither…" – his fingers tangled on hers – "You are the only one for me…"

Kaoru's heart beat so fast that she thought it would come out from her chest. His hand went up to the back of her neck, he pulled her head close to him gently: "I've lost this fight…"

"What fight Kenshin?" – she murmured her thoughts were inconsistent because of the proximity between them. He didn't replied, instead he decided to kissed her…. He did it before losing courage… And the moment his lips touched hers were magical for both of them. It was the first time she was being kissed and Kaoru felt her body in commotion. Kenshin on the other side was enjoying this moment of tender… like he never did in his entire life… her skin was so soft and her lips so tasty that he wanted to stay like this forever … and her perfume… oh… that sweet scent of jasmine was tempting him to lose his sense.

When their lips were separated Kaoru stood with her eyes closed, trying to figure out if what just happened was a dream or reality. "The fight against myself." - he stroke her hair gently. His voice was proof enough. She opened her eyes:"Were you fighting against yourself? Why?" – she asked still dazed with those last moments. He leaned his forehead against hers: "I was fighting against my feelings for you."

She shook her head: "You know, I should have a word in that matter, don't you?"

He smiled: "I know." – he hugged her close: "But now you do."

**:::::::::::**

"Damned! They failed again!" – a guy punched the table irritated while the others stared at him.

"Cool down… we are going to kill him you'll see." – Another one said – "Our mistake was to underestimate him. He thought he would be weaker alone…"

"Battousai… " – he growled – "If he dies it will be easier to get to Katsura." – the first man said.

"But it seems impossible to kill him!" – the other took a sip of sake.

"Nothing is impossible Kojiro… Nothing… at that applies to him to." – he got up – "Now let's go."Both man left the restaurant unaware that someone else was hearing their conversation.

:::

She walked for a mile, following them by far, they didn't seem to notice what she was doing, so she continued even when they entered the black forest. Tomoe looked at the leaves, they were so dark compared to the ones she was accostumated to see in her village. Nature used to calm her down, but everything in this forest seemed creepy. She shivered and tried to focus on her goal. _Where are they?_ – the two men had disappeared. _I should go back. I will find them other day._

"Are you looking for someone?" – she heard a voice behind her so she turned and departed herself with one of the guys from the restaurant. Fear petrified her and she felt unable to say a word.

Another one appeared behind her: "Oh…She looks terrified…" –he mocked –"But, then, who wouldn't? Seeing your face is terrifying!"

"Shut up Kojiro!" – he said to his commarade – "What do you want woman?" – he yelled back at her

Tomoe's voice seemed to be trapped on her throat: "I…I… heard what you said about Battousai."

The look of surprise on their faces empowered her to say the rest… "I want revenge from him too. He killed someone close to me…" – her voice showed the confidence that was missing before. "Being a woman is an advantage, I can get close to him and no one will ever look at me as a suspicious person."

"Your slut… do you think you can…" – the guy named Kojiro raised his hand and about to slap her on the face, but the other man hold his grip: "Wait Kojiro! She is right!"

"What do you mean?" – the other asked irritated

"Maybe this woman can be hurtful than our swords." – he whispered to his friend – "Don't you see? If he can't be killed by any sword, maybe all we need is to use another tool to kill." – both turned their faces to her and grinned: "Yeah… now I see." – Kojiro murmured

:::

The events of the previous night made Kenshin wake up in a good mood… they just kissed… but that was enough to allow a tiny hope to flourish, hoping that day would be better than the others… what seemed to be succeeding, because as they arrived to Katsura's place, Kenshin was informed that a meeting was taking place there. So all he needed to do was to watch over the house. Nothing would be more satisfying to him, because, as Kaoru was there too, he could observe her closely.

As she came to the outside, unaware of his gaze upon her, she started playing with Sakura's children… laugh immediately filled the backyard as they played hide and seek. Kenshin found himself smiling while enjoying the view.

hours passed by and it was almost evening when he heard Iizuka say:

"Seems like today's happy job his over.". Kenshin glanced at him: "Why?"

"We are going to attack the main building of the town." – before he passed Kenshin he placed a hand on the red-haired man's shoulder and said in a mischievous tone – "So, don't get too soft."

Kenshin sighed. It was too good to be true… He glanced at Kaoru who came from the inside and walked in his direction: "I heard you're going to leave." – she said. The look on her eyes showed she liked that as much as he did.

"Don't be like that." – he caressed her cheek – "I'll be back soon." – touching her only made it harder for him to leave.

She stared down: "I have a bad feeling about tonight." He lifted her chin: "I promise to come home with no bruises." – he said with a smile. "Will you wait for me?" – Kenshin asked. Her positive answer was the only thing that increased his will to return.

She gave a huge smile: "Of course I will… I will always wait for you Kenshin." – she hugged him tightly. It was so difficult to let him go… "Let me go, Kaoru." – he murmured at her ear – "They are already waiting for me."

She immediately step back when she noticed they were being watched. Kaoru blushed so much that her cheeks were as red as a tomato. That stole shy laughs from some of Kenshin's friends and from Kenshin himself. "See you later." – he said before turning his back on her.

Kaoru watched him go with a swelled heart. _I have a bad feeling about this…_

**::::::::::::::::::: **

Kenshin looked to the imposing building. This used to be the center of the Tokugawa government. Okubo wanted to use this attack to show the fragility of the Tokugawa regime. There were few guards on the outside. That was odd… an important place just like this…

As the first ten man knocked down the gates Kenshin realized that the guards on the entrance were just a façade, the real enemies were on the inside.

A tall man with a large hat slashed two of his companions in a blink of an eye. _Jin-Hei._ – Kenshin remembered the name Saigo said during the meeting. In order to help his friends Kenshin decided to face him, even thought Katsura adverted him that his opponent was Hajime Saito.

As soon as Jin-Hei saw Kenshin his attention flew to him: "Battousai… I heard a lot about you… let's see if you're so good as they say."

Kenshin just ignored the comment and attacked him so fast that it was impossible for him to defend. Instead of cursing or screaming in pain he laughed. He enjoyed pain. What a sadistic man! They were about to attack each other again when he heard Katsura calling him. He pointed him to another opponent that just arrived to the scene. Haijime Saito.

"Look at me, we haven't finished yet!" – Jin-hei yelled back to Kenshin.

Kenshin turned around and stroke Jin-hei on the right arm, which made it impossible for him to hold the sword:"You're not good enough for me." – then, he turned and face Saito.

"I suppose you are my opponent Battousai." – the tall man said – "I warn you… No one ever defeated my Gatotsu (I don't know if it's well written)"

Kenshin didn't replied, he wasn't afraid, he was sure of his own abilities. Saito unsheathed his sword and positioned himself, Kenshin waited for him to attack first, and so he did.

_He is fast. _He skipped his attacks but noticed his skills were above average… this man was good.

ON the other side Saito was thinking the same about Kenshin. At the first sight Kenshin seemed harmless… but as a samurai, Saito knew that those eyes were everything but harmless. Their fight was so intense that everyone stopped to watch them.

"Do you still think Kenshin can handle him?" – Okubo asked worried

"I think Kenshin finally found and opponent that matches his skills." – he replied his eyes on those two samurais.

"We lost many men Katsura, we have to retry." – Saigo said carrying one of his friends that was unconscious.

Katsura weight the chances. Both sides had lost many men… and the two strongest men from both sides were still fighting. Maybe the result of their personal battle would solve the entire match.

"Katsura, we can't hold anymore!" – Okubo's voice said: "Retrieve!" Katsura looked at Kenshin but he didn't look back, he was too absorbed in his opponent. "Himura!" – he called.

Both, Saito and Kenshin jumped back. "You're good." – Saito said with a grin on his lips – "But you could be better if you didn't let others command your will."

"Hajime Saito, this is your lucky day." – Kenshin sheathed his sword – "Your dead has been postponed."

Saito grinned: "Don't worry… we will meet again… and then we will see who's death has been postponed."

Kenshin slowly walked away. No fear or anticipation on his moves. He knew no one dared to attack him. He was too feared.

"Why did you stopped me from fighting him?" – Jin-hei asked mad with his captain.

"As he said… You were no match for him." – he looked at Jin-hei – "I am." – and left him behind.

Jin-hei looked at the back of the third Captain of Shinsen. The Mibu Wolf. _Who do you think you are? You can't humiliate me like this!... But I know your weakness Haijime, I know were to strike…_

_Battousai… _- he thought about the short, red-haired men he fought half an hour ago – _I will find your weak spot… I just need to talk with my 'friend'… and sooner than what you think, you're life is going to be a burning hell! – _he remembered his informant news about Battousai and grinned: _You made it impossible for me to use a sword again…But From what I heard… your 'fragility' will hurt you more than my sword could ever do._


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8 – Collateral Damages**

It had been two days since their battle… and still he couldn't take him out of his mind. The way he moved and striked with no anticipation was inhuman. For the first time in his life he had found an opponent who matched his skills. That made him eager to face Battousai again… Since looking for him was not an option, he had no orders to do so, he needed to relieve his tension, he needed something that would make him forget Battousai… actually, he needed someone to help him forget not only Battousai but the world around him. And he knew who managed to do that perfectly.

Tokio.

Since the day he met her he couldn't think of any other woman than her. Her silky skin, her soft lips… but she wasn't easy to catch… although gueixas purpose were be kind and seductive, Tokio was one of a kind. At first she ignored his gifts and denied give him attention… she used to serve him drinks, but immediately disappeared after that… she seemed a little out of the picture since all other gueixas used to accompanied him and even slept with him if he desired… But she was different, she seemed afraid of that world… and that fear drove Saito to spend all his money to buy her first night… and after that night they spend together, he knew as she knew, that what they shared was too special to be spoiled by any other person, so, he became her danna… to love her… to protect her, as she protected him from his dark side…

He fastened his steps towards Aka… those memories urged him to see her… But as soon as he arrived, he noticed something was wrong. The girls were trying to hide it, but fear and shock was written all over their faces. When they saw him standing at the entrance, Yumi signaled him to follow her. He did as she asked. She stopped when reached the hall and turned to him. Her red lips were trembling as she desperately tried to disguised some kind of…. Pain.

"What happened?" – he asked coldly.

She bowed her head and crossed her arms: "She is dead."

At first his ears didn't catch the meaning of her words but as he saw water running down her face, he figured out what happened. "Where is she?" – he asked hiding his hurt as much as his voice could.

She gave a deep breath: "Her room."

He immediately moved towards her room. As he did so, something inside his chest was in commotion… His breath was inconsistent and his mouth was getting dry. Dead? How could she be… dead?

Stopping in front her room door he inhaled the smell of her perfume… but this time it was mixed with …blood. He slide the door open and mentioned the girls inside to leave. Once alone in the room, he kneeled down next to her and stared at her face. The expression on her seemed of fear… whoever killed her was sadistic enough to stop and watch her suffer from the numerous slashes, and not give her a quick death. She was murdered by someone who enjoyed killing….

He placed a kiss on her discolored lips. "Revenge is mine."

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

"What did the doctor said about your arm?" – Kojiro asked as he saw Jin-Hei entering the restaurant.

He sat in front of him: "Battousai made it impossible for me to use the sword at a professional level." – he filled his cup with sake: "But I am still able to kill." – a sadistic smile appeared on his face.

The other shook his head. "I don't understand how they haven't expelled you yet." – he poured more sake on his cup.

"They already did." – it didn't matter for him what Saito told him the day before. He had satisfied his durst for blood when killed his ex-captain precious gueixa… Now to complete his plan, he only had to finish with Battousai. "Your friend from the Ishin… are you going to meet him tonight?"

"Yes, we have a meeting." – the other replied – "But not here. It would be too risky."

"I am going with you." – Jin hei said despite the look on his colleague's face: "I need to get some information about Battousai, that only someone close to him could show."

Kojiro was about to argue, but he knew that his persuasion wouldn't work on Jin hei. That man was just impossible to convince.

::::::::::

Iizuka waited nervously inside of the small room. Secrecy domain the three leaders since they discovered someone from the inside was a traitor, and It was becoming harder to leave Katsura's side without drawing attentions towards himself. These meetings had to end, or his head would be on the table soon.

"Hi there!" – Kojiro came into the room as long as Jin Hei. Iizuka didn't wait to complain: "It's becoming too risky for me to come here to sell you information."

"Are you scared? Well, if that happens just remind yourself that we pay you much more than your friends at Ishinshinshi… "

"The money won't be of any use if I am dead." – he immediately replied.

"Oh… so, now you are afraid to die?" – Kojiro didn't liked Iizuka at all, he put up with him because he was the only member on Katsura's side he could bribe – "Tell me what you got for me."

"If you want Katsura to be vulnerable you have to kill his right hand… and for that I mean… Battousai."

Kojiro raised an eyebrow: "Is that your plan? To kill someone who seems impossible to kill?"

"Where's the girl you found the other day?"- Iizuka asked – "Is she pretty?"

Both man stared at him in disbelief. They were discussing serious matters and he was asking if Tomoe was beautiful? "What in the world?... Damned Iizuka! This is serious…"

"I Know. But since you have no ability to kill the man…" – he was enjoying to humiliate them, since they did the same to him all the time. – "Maybe you should send a girl to do a man's job."

They exchanged glances. He had a point. They had already thought about that before, but since she didn't seem the kind of girl able to betray someone, they gave up from their first idea.

_But when pressured on the right spots people can do whatever they are requested to do_. – Koijiro thought. "Yes, she is pretty. I´ll arrange a meeting."

"What if she can't caught Battousai's attention? I heard he already has someone." – Jin-Hei asked

"Relationships end as soon as trust between the couple is destroyed… And, what is better to destroy their confidence than another woman?" – Iizuka smiled hearing Kojiro speaking.

"Why do you seem so happy?" – Jin-hei stared at Iizuka who's mischevious smile was getting bigger and bigger. He seemed crazy.

"I am thinking than I can kill a couple of swans with only one blow." – They needed to forget the traitor subject, but how would they do that unless a traitor is revealed? Of course he wouldn't reveal himself, but if he could find someone to take his place… and he already knew who that person would be.

**:::::::**

Kaoru was in her way to Aka along with Kenshin. Finnaly he agreed on letting her work there during the day. Not only because he wanted her to be happy but also because he knew that after this last attack he was going to spend much time away from her.

They could see the building by far, and Kenshin stopped walking. Kaoru stopped too and stared at him. Why he seemed so nervous? "Kenshin?"

He wanted to say something to cheer her up in her first day of work, but he hated the idea of Kaoru working there as much as he hated to be away from her, and nothing seemed to come to his mind to say. She came closer and placed her hand on his: "I know this is not easy for you." He tangled his fingers on hers. In these last days this gesture became a habit. He loved the warmth of her hands. "And I understand your fears, as well. But I promise this is just a job and I would never do something that could hurt your feelings, because I love you Kenshin." He looked at her and the honesty in her eyes calmed his heart. "Came here." – he said pulling her into a hug.

No matter how many fears were growing inside of him, he needed to let her go, he needed to trust her. She became the most important person for him in this short time. Since they assumed their feelings for each other things became official. When he arrived home all his demons seemed to run away… Kaoru had that effect on him… a touch of heaven in earth. A place he could rest. And that made him want more… the few time he spent with her, he wanted more… things were becoming clear in his mind: He needed to give up on this job. He wanted a normal life, a life with no blood, and the only reason he would use a sword was to protect the people he loved. She and his kids…

_What in the world? Why am I thinking about kids? _Kenshin opened his eyes and inhaled the sweet scent of jasmine. He was hallucinating. "Well, I don't want you to be late on your first day, you should go." – he pulled away from her.

Kaoru gave a sad smile. Part of her regretted of asking for this, for this job, she knew Kenshin was fighting against himself to let her go. But she didn't want to stay all day long alone waiting for him to come home. And the waiting seemed longer because she never knew when he would come home hurt…

She gave a deep breath: "I need to go."

He shook his head positively: "I wish you a good day."

"For you too." – she smiled and started walking away.

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

When Kaoru arrived to the restaurant they were still closed, but another girl was awaiting at the entrance too. "Hi! You must be the new girl."

Kaoru nod. "Yes I am. My name is Kaoru."

"I am Yumiko." – she had brown hair and vivid green eyes. They were really expressive.

"Nice to meet you." – Kaoru smiled: "Is it usual to be close at this time?"

Yumiko shook his head negatively: "Something must have happened." – she looked at the other side of the building and saw a woman coming from the inside: "Haruka!" – she waved and the woman walked quickly in their direction.

"What happened? Why are the doors closed?" – Yumiko asked but the look on Haruka's face indicated that something bad happened. "Let's go inside."

As they were entering the restaurant Kaoru saw a man walking in the opposite way. He was tall and his hair was black, but what caught her attention were the aggressive look on his yellow eyes… they looked like Kenshin's eyes, when they met for the first time. As he passed by Haruka she bowed and said something that Kaoru's hears didn't reach. He just looked at her but no word came out from his mouth.

Yumiko's eyebrows raised but she said nothing too. They kept following Haruka until she opened one of the doors and mentioned them to entre.

Once inside she started talking: "Tokio was murdered last night."

Yumiko's hand covered her mouth. Haruka continued: "Saito believes it was a revenge. We must be very careful now. I know it happened at night, and that you work here only during the day, but you must keep sharp, and, if someone, or something seems strange you should tell me. If your hear a suspicious conversation, you come and tell me immediately."

They both nod. Kaoru and Yumiko they were still at shock, still Kaoru didn't knew Tokyio, it was awkward to have such news on her first day.

"I know this must be strange to you." – Haruka turned to Kaoru – "But, our clients, even during the days are very powerful and very dangerous too, my advice is never trust anyone of them."

Kaoru nod. She had a feeling that this homicide story wouldn't leave Kenshin pleased…

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

The morning was a calm one. Only a few costumers, and for the first day, Kaoru stood on the Kitchen cleaning the dishes. But something was bugging her. Why should someone take revenge against a woman? "This girl… Tokio…" – Kaoru asked while washing the dishes – "Was she… a gueixa?"

Yumiko nod: "Yes…" – she glanced at Kaoru – "She was very beautiful and kind to everyone. But she didn't like her job. Only when Saito became her danna… she seemed happier than before."

"Danna?" – Kaoru asked. She had never heard that word before.

"Yes… Don't you know what a danna is?" – Yumiko stared at her in disbelief – "Your owner, your man… Since the moment you have a danna you belong to him and no other man is allowed to touch you."

"I see… a commitment… and this Saito, was he the man we saw this morning when Haruka brought us to the inside? " – she asked remembering the look on his eyes.

"Yes." – Yumiko nod her eyes scanning Kaoru's face: "He must feel horrible… they killed her as a warn to him. "

"Why do you assume that?"

"Well, he is the 3rd Captain of Shinsen , so he is a very powerful man, I suppose her death had something to do with that… Probably a rival that wanted revenge and… we can say…Tokyio was… his weak point." – Yumiko had the ability of speaking and working very fast. "I think we have costumers."

Kaoru looked through the opening in the wall and saw four men arriving.

"Ohhh… It's him… Mr Ice Blue Eyes." – Yumiko grinned while saying this.

"Is that his name?" – Kaoru asked surprised

"Of course not. His name is Aoshi… Isn't he a catch? Oh my…" – she stopped washing the dishes and her hand flew to her chest. "I go there."

Kaoru laugh with her companion's attitude and watch her walking to attend them.

The taller one… that Aoshi… he seemed distant and cold, despite his attractiveness, like her friend said. The other guys acted normal. Talked, laugh, drank… but the way they treated and talked to Aoshi was different of the way they talked among them… It was a more respectful way… as if he was their leader or something.

Kaoru could hear part of their conversation from the kitchen:

"Too bad Hannya didn't came." – Said one whose face was all scarred up.

"The castle needs someone to guard it…. And who's better than Hannya to guard?" – a small one said.

"Your right… And he would scared everyone with that ugly face of his." – the bigger one said. Acctualy he was so big that, him alone, occupied three seats.

"He is talking as if he was nicer!" – the other two burst in laugh…

They seemed friendly although their looks. Kaoru sighed.

_I wonder what Kenshin is doing now._

**:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::**

** A WEEK LATER**

Kaoru was enjoying working at Aka. Her colleagues were nice and Yumi liked Kaoru's job. And with the payment she received from her first week of work, Kaoru had something special in mind for the weekend. She would buy scented candles, and food from the restaurant, because she obviously can't cook, and banquet Kenshin with a romantic and calm ambient. She knew they both needed to spend quality time together… and Kenshin told her that because of the festival, Katsura would dismissed him, so… she wasn't going to let this opportunity slip through her fingers .

"Kaoru?" – she turned and saw Yumi entering in the Kitchen.

"Hai. Isn't soon for you to be here?" – Yumi used to appear only after five o'clock.

"I woke up in good mood… and decided to see how you girls were doing." – she approached Kaoru that was cleaning the dishes from the lunch. "A busy day isn't it?"

Kaoru nod: "Many people came here to lunch… I think it's related to the proximity with the festival."

"We always have more costumers at Saturday. People receive their payments and start spending it." – Yumi clarified.

"But now it's calmer." – Kaoru raised her head to look at the main room.

"Only a lonely costumer at the table two." – she said.

Kaoru looked in table's two direction and saw a girl. "I haven't seen her. Sorry." – she cleaned her hands on her uniform, but Yumi stopped her: "No need to stop what you're doing. I am going to attend her."

Kaoru stared at her boss: "Really?"

Yumi stared back: "Why do you seem so surprised?"

Kaoru's voice stuck at her throat: "But you're the boss…"

"And that should mean that I don't have the right to attend my clients?" – Yumi smiled with Kaoru's embarrassment. "I am going to attend her."

Kaoru watched her go in the girl's direction. Yumi was elegant and beautiful, everything in her was to impress, her clothes, her makeup, her arranged hair…. Kaoru's eyes fixed on the girl at the table…she was also beautiful but simpler than Yumi. She was wearing a white kimono with a blue obi, and her hair was long and black, her eyes were green… a sad green.

::::::::

"What's happening with you?" – Kaoru heard Yumi calling. She didn't even notice she had already came back.

Kaoru look down at her hands at started washing dishes again: "She is so beautiful."

Yumi raised an eyebrow: "Who are you talking about? The girl I just attend?"

Kaoru nod without looking at her.

"She might seem beautiful… but there's something about her…. That just doesn't fell right." – Yumi said thoughtfully. "Her eyes… seem empty." – she turned her attention to Kaoru: "Yours not." – she thought for a while and then added: "Your eyes… they show… hope."

Kaoru raised her head and stared at her boss.

"That's the truth." – Yumi smiled at the look on Kaoru's face. "Probably that's why he loves you."

Kaoru blushed at the comment and shook her head negatively. Yumi sympathized that girl immediately, without knowing why. She was humble… and she was committing herself to a man whose life was sostained as a red blanket… Perhaps she thought it was on her hands to change his life… so naïve… she would end up hurt in the end… Not by him… but from collateral damages.

"Do you… love him?" – there was a long time since that word didn't came out from her mouth… It was strange to taste it…

"Yes I do." – Kaoru's lack of hesitation was proof enough of the truth of her feelings for Battousai.

"Then, prepare yourself." – Yumi picked up an apple and took it to her mouth.

"You are going to suffer… Every woman who loves will eventually suffer." – Kaoru stared at her in disbelief. How could she have such a negative vision of love? And why was she talking that way towards her?

"Why?" – the blue-eyed girl asked, a glint of fear in her voice. Fear of knowing the answer.

Yumi chew her apple slowly: "It's life dear Kaoru… Man always end up hurting us…"

"Love doesn't worth what it costs." – her words were cold. Probably the words of someone who's heart was broken a long time ago.

Kaoru looked down not knowing what to say. "Don't be sad." – she heard Yumi's voice – "As long as you keep strong enough to endure the pain… it will be fine."

"I see." – Kaoru was disappointed with this conversation. She thought Yumi was the kind of person that would recommend not demoralized her…

"We have costumers… I'll go there." – she said quickly leaving the kitchen.

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Iizuka insisted so much for him to come to the restaurant… Kenshin only accepted because he thought it would be nice to join Kaoru in her way home. When they arrived, Kenshin saw a girl waiting at the table but his eyes turned in other direction. He was looking for Kaoru.

"Himura, this is my cousin Tomoe." – Kenshin bowed his head and sat down at Iizuka's side. "She is staying with us for a while… I am thinking of asking Katsura to let her stay in his place during the day."

Kenshin nod. "It's safe… Until we know who the traitor is, our families still in danger." – he answered thinking about his own situation.

"Our families?" – Iizuka laughed – "Are you talking about the Kamyia girl?" – he said staring at Tomoe.

Kenshin found his companion's attitude odd: "Kaoru is my only family. So, yes, of course I am referring to her."

"May I ask what you want to drink, gentleman?" – Yumi appeared on the scenario what took Kenshin to wonder if something happened to Kaoru.

"Sake for both of us." – Iizuka asked. Yumi nod and went back to the kitchen.

"Don't get this in the wrong way, but… I think you should choose someone different from her… A grown up woman… Kaoru is just a girl… she barely has sixteen."

Kenshin turned his head towards him: "I Think I still in charge of my own life. And if you want our friendship to endure you will never again refer to Kaoru without the respect you own to any other woman who is not yours or from your family." – his tone made it clear this was a warning. A warning that made Iizuka understand how deep he was in love with that girl… He needed to act fast, he needed to end this happy couple thing.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

As Yumi went to the Kitchen she saw Kaoru spying through the opening in the wall. "They want sake. Do you want to serve them? Your red-haired man is there too."

Kaoru jumped back startled. Then she shook her head negatively: "No. You should go."

_Why am I feeling this? Why is this fear growing inside of my heart?_

As she saw Kenshin entering she felt happiness because that meant they would go home together… but as she saw him sitting near that woman… she felt something… like someone punched her on the chest. Was she Jealous?

"Yumi… I am going home." – she finally decided.

The gueixa narrowed her eyes: "Are you feeling sick? Do you want me to ask Dr Takani to see you?"

Kaoru shook her head: "No… It's just…. I forget I had to do something…and since my shift is over… "

"For me that's fine, but don't you want to wait for him?" – she had the feeling that the red haired man went there to take her home with him, and the way he looked around the place… he was searching for her…. So Kaoru's attitude seemed a little out of scenario.

"I forgot I had something to do before I go home." – she said taking off her uniform.

"See you tomorrow then." – Yumi picked her uniform to put it on the locker.

Kaoru was about to leave, when she turned around to ask a final favor. "If he asks for me… please tell him I just had to leave sooner." – Apprehension was all over her face.

Yumi didn't said a word, she just nod.

_If you just forgot you had something to do, why are you asking me to lie?_

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Kenshin patiently waited for Yumi to come back with the sake in order to ask her about Kaoru. The Gueixa had a feeling that he was going to ask that. As she placed the bottle and served them, the samurai immediately asked: "Yumi-san, is Kaoru at the kitchen?"

She turned her attention to the red haired man. He was young and at the first sight he seemed harmless, but his reputation as a cold-blood murderer preceded him in a way that was impossible to deny who he truly was: "Kaoru-dono had to leave soon… she wasn't feeling well. So as she finished her shift she went home."

He worried about that girl. That was a fact, because the look on his eyes change immediately as he absorbed the information: "I need to go home."- he got up totally forgetting the others.

"Wait! You haven't drunk your sake!" – Iizuka's complaints didn't reached Kenshin's ears… he was already out of Aka.

Yumi walked back slowly to the kitchen smiling on the inside. It was funny to see Battousai worried about Kaoru… Maybe… he loved her after all.

"He loves her… " – Tomoe said out of the blue.

Iizuka turned his head in her direction. "Love can be destroyed."

"I think you should try something else… Separating those two is not going to be easy." – The look on Kenshin's eyes as the restaurant's owner said Kaoru left soon, was one of deep worry and care. Adding that to the fact that he totally ignored her… Of course he knew she was there he greeted and all that stuff, but his lack of interest on her showed Tomoe that the place on his heart was already occupied. Deep inside he was in a commitment to that woman.

_How far am I able to be a part of this?_

"Don't worry, sooner that what you think this happy-couple thing will be over… I don't need your help till then." – he stared at her wondering how failed his plan seemed after seeing Himura 's reaction.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::.

"Kaoru?" – as she heard him saying her name her body shuddered. She didn't hear him entering. "Are you ok? I went to the restaurant and was told that you came home sooner." – he kneeled beside her.

Kaoru shook her head: "It's just a headache."

Still, he wasn't satisfied with her answer. She seemed sick and her usual smile was gone. He placed his hand on her forehead: "You don't seem to have fever, but it's better if you let the doctor see you." – he was about to pick up her but she protested: "There's no need Kenshin." – she assured – "It's a women thing." – she blushed when she said that and Kenshin put her down again: "Are you sure?"

Kaoru take a quick look at him: "Yes."

He knew she was hiding something. He knew her well enough by now. "Don't you trust me? Don't you trust me to tell me what's really happening?"

She raised her eyes to him and sighed: "What were you doing at the restaurant?"

Kenshin raised an eyebrow: "Iizuka asked me to go with him and I agreed because I thought that we could go home together… you and I. I Knew you were finishing your shift by the time we arrived."

"And…. Who was that girl with you?" – she ask fearing that her question would make her look silly.

"She is Iizuka's cousin… she is new on the town. I think I didn't catch her name…" – Kenshin thought for a while trying to remember the girl's name.

Kaoru sighed again: "I was stupid I am sorry."

"Pardon me?" – Kenshin shook his head not understanding why she was insulting herself.

Kaoru got up and gave a small laugh. "Never mind." – she pulled him using both hands – "I brought soup for our dinner." – Kaoru started walking backwards while holding his hands. Kenshin was still dazed with her change of humor: "Are you sure you're ok Kaoru?"

She nod: "I am fine now that I am home with you." – she felt her back approaching the wall as his hands wrapped around her waist and he rested his head on her shoulder. "You don't know how it feels to hear that." – he hugged tightly.

Kaoru blushed with the proximity. "I really don't know… you should tell me."

"I am telling you… it makes me feel… complete." – he look intently to her for a while before kissing her. He stopped and took a step back. Something came to his mind. "Did you know a girl named Tokyio?"

The mention of that name made Kaoru's mind jump back to a week ago : "Only heard about her… as far as I know she used to work at Aka before she was murdered."

Kenshin stared at her in disbelief: "You never mentioned that to me."

Kaoru bit her bottom lip: "I didn't wanted you to worry. "

The samurai shook his head and turned his back on her: "You work at very dangerous place. Do you understand that? "

"She was only murdered because of Saito. Not because her job." – Kaoru disclosed the information without thinking twice about the real meaning of her words.

"Saito?" – Kenshin faced her – "Haijime Saito?" – his eyes scrutinized her. Kaoru stepped back wondering why Kenshin seemed so interested: "I don't know his last name."

"How is he?" – he came close to her

"He is tall, with long black hair…" – Kaoru didn't mentioned that Saito's eyes looked like Kenshin's when he is mad or engaging on a fight.

Kenshin's expression became serious: "Do you have any idea of how dangerous that man is?"

Kaoru widened her eyes: "Why?"

The red-haired man shook his head in a reproval way: "Kaoru, I still don't like the idea of you working there. Don't you want to reconsider?"

"Why Kenshin? " – she replied – "Just because someone was killed doesn't mean the same is going to happen to me!"

He placed his hands on her shoulders: "Kaoru, she was killed as a warning to him…" – he looked deep in her eyes – "Don't you realize how many enemies I have as well? Staying there all day, unprotected, makes you an easy target for them."

She felt speechless, because his worries were genuine… and his arguments were true.

"I ask you to think again about this decision…" – he sighed – "I don't know what I would do if someone hurt you." – he stared at the ceiling for a while as imagining the hurtful things that his enemies could do to her. He shut his eyes tightly and rubbed his forehead.

"Ok Kenshin. I promise I am going to reevaluate this situation." – she didn't want to see him that way. And she knew that he would feel miserable if something happened… Kaoru didn't wanted to increase his burden of guilt.

Her answer brought him some peace of mind. Deep inside he hoped her to take the right decision.

**:::::::::::::::::**

**NEXT DAY**

He stared at the blood dripping from his blade. They kicked him out. It wasn't unexpected. He saw that coming when Saito disrespected him in the day he fought Battousai. That's why he took his revenge on her… On Tokyio.

That made Saito put all his man after him, and even without saying the truth that leads to this banishment, Jin-Hei knew he knew… and he also knew Saito would come for his head.

_That stubborn slut… _she fought till the end, as if she expected her Captain to came and save her. _Pathetic!_ But in one thing Saito choose well… she was fierce: _"You're an animal… a beast!"_ – he remembered her words as she realized no one would come to save her: "_But he will come for me… even if I am gone… he will come for me."_ and the look in her eyes has he gave her the last blow… there was no fear, just… hate.

Jin-Hei walked towards the forest that lead to Battousai's house. He needed to form a plan to kill her without facing him… he wanted the red-haired samurai to feel dishonored and helpless in her death… the most acclaimed and powerful men of this era were unable to save their own mistress. He laugh at his plan…

_Now, there's only one girl left to kill._

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Kaoru made her way home with a huge smile on her face. Tonight was a special night. She made all the arrangements, the scented candles, the special food… she couldn't stop imagining the look on Kenshin's face as he arrive home…

She walked fast as she felt urgency facing the things she had to prepare.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Things were getting really crazy at Ishinshinshi. Trust between the group was on the line. Every word that was spoken was being analyzed, they were demanding to know the meaning of every move they made….Kenshin was getting tired of that lack of trust… he was getting tired of this all Ishishinshi thing… They weren't serving their first purpose… they were dismissing the protection of the people and the fight for the new era Kenshin desired so much… they were postponing his retirement and the peace he wished to find at the end of Tokugawa era…

And all Kenshin could do was to force himself to a path he knew for sure that there was no returning… he knew that he would probably lost his soul among all this violence…

He opened the main door and was invaded by the sweet scent of jasmine… Kenshin rushed himself towards the dining room and find it filled with little lights… Kaoru appeared with a tray on hands, and as she saw him, she seemed surprised, probably wasn't expecting him so soon. "Oh… I wanted it to be a surprise." – She said her voice showing her disappointment with herself.

And there he was… between the fear of losing his soul to the violence of his job or losing it for her…

Kenshin sat and close his eyes: "I am ready to be surprised."

"Do you Promise not to open your eyes until I say so?" – her childish question made him laugh: "I gave you my word."

And so he did. It took a while and during that time all Kenshin could do was to guess by the smell what was on the trays she was placing in front of him. "You can open your eyes now."

He slowly opened them and observed the scenario in front of him. There were at least three different plates, fish, meat and soup and everything seemed delicious. He smiled with contentment.

"You made it yourself?" – he asked still wondering which one he would taste first.

"No." – she replied – "Because I wanted you to have a peaceful night… and If I cooked myself… that wouldn't happen for sure." – Kaoru said making a point about her cooking – "My food is horrible… and this is from Aka." – she end up saying – "I wanted tonight to be special, because, it's been five months since we first met." – Kenshin glanced at her. "It's true." – he said remembering the first time he saw her… five months ago, at Katsura's house…. "When I woke up that day… I was far away from realizing it be no ordinary day."

Kaoru smiled at his words. "I was so confused… I had so many questions in my mind…."

"Did you find the answers?" – he immediately asked.

Kaoru took a while to think about it… she still didn't knew how she end up there, must had something to do with her dreams, as she was a child, maybe she needed to know him, or, maybe he needed to know her… all she knew was she was happy because she was living with the man she always loved…. She was living a dream."Some of them... others I just hope to find with time."

Never in his life he felt he was important to someone, in the way she made him feel. Kaoru had all this work, cleaning and preparing this meal, because she cared, because she loved him: "Arigato, Kaoru for this wonderful meal and night..."

She nod her cheeks were red with embarrassment.

Maybe this meant their relationship would step up to another level… The idea was on Kenshin's mind all the time. "I fear for your life Kaoru…"

That sentence seemed out of scene, but he had a point: "Being with someone like me, it's dangerous for you."

Kaoru was about to protest, but he raised his hand asking her to let him finish his sentence, what she did. "If I leave this city… Would you leave with me?"

"Of course I would. Where else would I go?" – her immediate answer showed her conviction. "Is something bothering you, Kenshin?"

"The usual." – he took a sip of saké and looked at her.

Kaoru sighed: "If your work is not allowing you to have a clean conscience, then you should quit. I don't like to see you so sad. You're a wonderful person, but seems like you're trapped between obeying them or being loyal to yourself, to your feelings, to your conscience… How long will you be able to endure that fight?"

"It's a question of honor, Kaoru." – he simply replied

"Honor and glory aren't the most important things in life… You can call me silly, but… what happens to that so-called honor or glory when because of that you're far away from everything you love? When people around you are dying… and no matter what you do Kenshin, you cannot save them all."

He stared at her for a while. It wasn't the first time he heard those words…but not from her mouth… "Why don't you content yourself saving the people who crosses your path?"

"My path?" – he asked

She nod: "Kenshin… you cannot save or change the world… and if you continue trying so hard… it will turn against you. And I don't wanna see that."

Kenshin looked at her intently: "You spoke very wise words for someone of your age, Kaoru."

"Oh come on Kenshin, don't talk to me like I am a child!"

He chuckled. "Would you really follow me if I decide to leave this place?"

She sighed. Why was so difficult for him to believe in her? "Kenshin…" – she got up just to sit closer to him: "Since the moment you took me to your place and took care of me, I promised myself that I would never leave you. Only If you want me to."

He caressed her face: "I would never ask you to leave me."

She closed her eyes enjoying the warmth of his hands.

"I am thinking about this for some time now… and I can't stay here anymore, I want to turn my back to this… war." – Kenshin felt the urgency to leave… every night it was getting difficult to clean the blood from his hands… no matter how much he washed them… that smell… it stayed. And the nightmares… the faces of the men he killed haunted him every night.

"Do you have a place in mind?" – Kaoru asked

The samurai thought for a while. After all these years How would be the village he was born? "I still don't know." Maybe he could start a new life there.

"Ok. Whenever you want is fine for me." – she replied.

"Maybe we can search for your friends." – Kenshin thought out loud.

Kaoru widened her eyes. A nostalgic feeling took over her and that didn't go unnoticed to the samurai: "You don't want to see them again?"

She shrugged her shoulders: "It's not that." – she bit her lip – "I don't think it's possible to see them again. They are at a different place now."

He held her hands in his and assured her: "I promise that I will find your friends, and then, we will live together. Because I know how much you miss them and that they are a very important part of your life."

"Yes they are." – she placed a kiss on his hands – "But you don't understand… " – she sighed, how was she going to explain him something she didn't fully understand? "Like I told you before, everything seems so unnatural in what concerns to my presence here. And seems like we have decades between us… " – so shook her negatively obviously she had thought about that thousands of times without reaching any conclusion – "I don't know… sometimes I think I am crazy."

"No you're not." – Kenshin immediately replied. Even if her story seemed strange he knew she was telling the truth, at least that was the truth for her… Kenshin suspected that maybe she hit her head or something, and some of her memories were foggy and eventually as time passes by she would remember everything.

She shook her head trying not to think of her past life: "When are you going to tell Katsura your decision?"

Katsura was the man who took him to Ishinshinshi and he never hide that to complete his job Kenshin would have to kill people… "Tomorrow. It will be the first thing in the morning."

"Are you sure?" – she knew that loosing Kenshin would be a harsh cut to the group.

Kenshin nod: "I am." – he embraced her. "It's enough of blood."

Kaoru smiled happily. She knew he took the right decision. "I love you Kenshin."

He kissed her hair: "I love you too, Kaoru."

As an interruption to that sweet moment, Kenshin felt a presence on the outside. A presence of someone he knew. He huffed. There was no resting for him… He got up."What are you doing Kenshin?" – she asked.

"Iizuka is waiting for me on the outside. I must go and talk to him. It will be just a minute…" – he slide the door opened and looked back again. She was worthy of a picture, as the moonlight illuminated her face… her eyes were so sweet and the contrast of her white skin and the black hair… she was completely outstanding - "Wait for me… I still want to try that desert."

She smiled back: "I will be here."

The night was great. Everything was perfect. The food… Kenshin's mood, and his decisions of quitting… the hope of a new life… seemed to good to be true.

_Kenshin needed a chance to have a normal life… a happy one… Maybe this means he will finally have that chance._ – she went to the kitchen to get the plates for the desert – _But then again… what if my purpose here was only to led him to a better life? To teach him he had a choice? If that's the way things are… what will happen to me after the moment this purpose it's fulfilled? Will I disappear? Is it possible for him to come to my world as it was for me to come to his? – _she placed the dirt dishes at the sink and went to the dining room again… her mind full of questions.

As she entered in the room Kaoru saw him standing there facing the wall. "I've been thinking… If we are leaving… I need to tell Yumi."

He didn't answered… he didn't even turned his face to her.

Kaoru placed the dishes on the floor and approached him: "Are you ok Kenshin?"the conversation with Iizuka must have disturbed him… Probably something concerned to their jobs.

"Kenshin…." – she gently placed her hand on his shoulder but as he turned she gasped… she gasped in fear. His eyes… were golden-yellow… his facial expression showed how angry he was. She stepped back: "What happened Kenshin?" – she tried to draw herself together. If something happened she needed to help him not to make him feel even more miserable.

But the words that came out from his mouth only scared more: "You lied to me." - his eyes focused on her.

"What?" – she thought her ears were playing tricks on her. but the tone of his voice and the expression on his face matched his words: "I never lied to you Kenshin! What are you talking about?"

He shook his head and circled her: "How could you play me like this? How could you?"

Tears formed in her eyes… she wanted to contain them but the situation was so stupid and unfair: "Kenshin I never lied to you… I don't know what you're talking about! Please explain to me."

"And I believed… " – he was talking with himself but it was loud enough for her to ear: "As a foul I believed your care and love were genuine."

"And they are!" – she yelled with a mix of angry and hurt. He was doubting her feelings for him. The fear disappeared when she realized she needed to shake him to reality or else… she grab his arms and shook him literally: "How can you doubt of my feelings for you? I am here because of you! My life changed because of you!" But no matter how loud she screamed her words reached his ears but not his mind: "I don't blame you… I really am a monster…" – his looked at her in the eye – "How could you ever love me?" – he got himself free from Kaoru arms and took a few steps of distance from her.

Then again, he gave his back on her.

"Kenshin…" – she sighed tears running down her face – "Was Iizuka who told you all of this?" – she tried to wipe away the tears – "How could you believe someone like him to give you advices about us?"

"You must leave and tell you're imperialist friends that…"- she didn't let him finished the sentence because she immediately understood the point: "Iizuka said to you… that I was the traitor you're looking for?! And you believed?" – she yelled at him – "With what goal would I betray you Kenshin? Tell me!"

He shook his head: "I don't know… that's up to you."

She shook her head disappointed with him and his lack of trust on her.

"I may be a monster… but I am not able to do what I was asked." – an inner battle was happening at that moment. Iizuka was clear, the orders were to kill her and leave to Otsu In the next day.

She didn't care what he was saying… he already hurt her deeply… more that what his sword could ever do."I never betrayed you…" – she whispered – "Never…"

"Leave." – his eyes were covered with his hair. He was asking her to leave his house?

"Kenshin… are you kicking me out of your life?" – her voice failed her breath was inconsistent as if she had been running for over an hour.

He glanced at her for a while: "They want me to do something worse to you."

"Then do it. It's better than to live with the guilt of doing something I haven't done." – her words were harsh and cold. She opened her arms: "Kill me!"

"Please leave." – he said trying not to assimilate her earlier words. She was playing the role of the innocent perfectly.

"No!" – she screamed.

"Don't try to mess up with my head Kaoru!" – he screamed – "You know I could never do that to you!"

His words softened the anger on her heart. He could never hurt her… that meant he still care, even if he thought she had done something like that, he still care…"As you should know I would never lie to you." – she finally spoke.

He opened his mouth to talk but the look of hurt and disappointment on her face shut him up. Could she be telling the truth? But then, why would Iizuka lie?

She turned her back on him and walked to the door slowly. On the inside, Kenshin wanted to ask her to stay although the situation… but he refrained himself from doing that.

"I am going to prove my innocence to you." – she said before leaving to the outside. The weather had changed, it was raining and the wind was blowing wildly. She looked one last time at him: "And in that day Kenshin, you will come to me and ask me for forgiveness…" – her eyes were red from crying and he couldn't stand the look of disappointment on her face. "And I will not forgive you."

:::::

As she closed the door behind her Kaoru felt as her whole world had been destroyed. She walked alone in the rain and it didn't matter to her if she was getting wet and cold. She wanted so much to awake up and realize this was all a nightmare… like before… she already had a nightmare like this once… except now, it was real. She was so out of reality that failed to notice the presence of a man standing in front of her.

"Finally you came to me." – his words were almost inaudible because of the sound of the raindrops hitting the floor.

Kaoru stopped and watched him for a while. He had a sword on his hand and another one on his hip. She couldn't see his face properly, she just noticed the huge hat that he used."I don't know you."

He smiled mischievously: "You're just about to know." – and he sprinted in her direction. Kaoru realized he was going to attack her and tried to run in the opposite way, but he was faster than her and easily catch her. Kaoru could feel the blade on her throat and Jin-hei's breath on the back of her neck. She was trapped. "Eventually all of you try to run… but I always catch my prey." – he absorbed the scent form her hair: "Humm… jasmine…" with his free hand he put her hair behind her ear: "Tell me… it's a shame he kicked you out, isn't it?"

Kaoru grasped. Did He knew what happened? But how? The only person who knew was the same one that told Kenshin… Iizuka. How could this man know? Did he belong to Ishinshinshi as well? Did he came to kill her instead of Kenshin? To do the job he wasn't able to do?

"He didn't trusted you, didn't he?" – he talked close to her ear making her feel dizzy and disgusted with the proximity between them. "Even if you're telling the truth he preferred to believe his friends… " – he licked his lips – "Maybe he dind't loved you…. He was just feeling lonely and used you… until he found someone… better."

Kaoru was frustrated. Never in her life she felt so miserable. First the lack of trust from Kenshin and then this man… "Kenshin is not like that!" – she used her elbow to punch his stomach with her all strength and, as he wasn't expecting someone so little to have so much strength, he released her, still shocked with the pain her blow caused.

Kaoru tried to run back to Kenshin's place but he was faster than her, and once again he catch her, but this time he slashed her back and she fall to the ground. He wanted to make sure she didn't runaway again. "Aggressive aren't you? I love an aggressive girl!" – he surrounded her while she tried to find strengths to get up. He picked her up by her hair and threw her to the ground again, making her hit the floor with her face. Immediately her nose starts bleeding and her lip too. "Too bad he is not here to see what I am going to do to you." Kaoru tried to get up and hardly succeed, her arms were so weak… How could this man do that to her? How could he be so mean? Jin-hei stared at her: "Don't give me that look."

"You're a monster." – she yelled at him "And you will burn in hell for what you're doing."

"Hahaha!" – this girl was amusing him. – "You know… I am no worse than your dear Battousai. You should see how fast and well he kills…"

"Shut up!" – she screamed. It was painful to picture Kenshin like that. Slowly she got up and faced him: "Why did you lie to him?"

"Why?" – he stared at her in disbelief: "You didn't get it, did you?"- he sighed and looked at the blood on the blade: "I am not wasting more time…" – he glanced at her: "Say your prayers, your time has come."

Kaoru was petrified. She was going to die. Her all body was in commotion. The wound on her back was bleeding so much… she felt her knees shaking and her head dizzy… Numbness… Then she saw him coming in her way but although the fear, she didn't closed her eyes. The only thing in her mind was Kenshin…

_He will never know that I am innocent. _

As He was about to strike her something made him stop… Kaoru stared at the eyes of the man in front of her, at the same time she lowered her head and noticed a red spot on his chest… it was getting bigger and bigger. Suddenly Jin-Hei fell on the ground with two swords stroked on his back. Behind him was a tall man wearing a gabardine… his face seemed familiar to her, but Kaoru was in so much pain that felt unable of recognizing him. As he approached her, Kaoru stepped back, but her foot failed and she fell.

He lowered next to her and assured:"I will not harm you."

That was all she needed to Hear at the moment. The last thing she remembered was the moment he took her in his arms.

After that exhaustion took over her and she fainted.


	9. Chapter 9

** Chapter 9 - GoodBye**

_"I don't understand why this injure is taking so long to heal Doctor?" _– a feminine voice spoke.

_"The cut is deeper than we first thought… it's going to take a little longer than usual to get back to normal. Poor girl… "- _this time a male's voice took place.

_"There has been three days since she is here and she never opened her eyes, not even one time. Do you think she is in a comatose?"_

_"Maybe..."_

_"Do you think the cause of her not waking up are her physical wounds? They are really bad!"_

_"Unfortunately Kayla, physical wounds are the only ones we can help her with… In what concerns to the emotional ones, she needs to find inner strengths to heal them on her own."_

_"Yes.. But she is so young…" –_ Kaoru felt someone caressing her face_ – "How is it possible for someone to do this with other human being?"_

_"These days are dangerous Kayla, and the lord of this place is also a dangerous man, don't be fooled by his looks… we must not trust anyone. We must treat this young woman without raising too many questions,_ok?"

There was silence for a while. All she could hear were the sound of their moves around the room. After a while she understood she was alone again_. _They left. At the moment she opened her eyes tear drops fell from them. she was holding them unconsciously... she tried to raise her arm to wipe her eyes but moving pained her so much she end up giving up. Kaoru remembered her attacker, but even worse than her open injury on her body, were the wounds on her soul caused by the slashes from his words:

_"Even if you're telling the truth he preferred to believe his friends… Maybe he dind't loved you…. He was just feeling lonely and used you… until he found someone… better."_

**::::**

There were many questions in his mind. Who was this girl? He knew she worked at Aka and that her name was Kaoru, because he heard Yumiko and Yumi called her sometimes when he was at the restaurant, but what Aoshi needed to know was who was she as a person. He sent Hannya to search for personal information but all he could discover was that Kaoru used to live at Battousai's place, and spent some time with Kogoro Sakura, The leader of Ishishinshi's wife. But before that there is nothing. No parents, no friends or neighbors… nothing. It was like as if she never existed!

Apparently the attack was a revenge not against her, but against the famous Hitokiri. But, if he cared for her, why in the world would he let her go out alone at night knowing that would be dangerous?

Aoshi steeped into the restaurant and as he saw one of the girls he sent her call for Yumi. The girl nod and after a while the owner of the restaurant was in front of him. "It's not from you to came here at night,Aoshi-sama." – when the girl told her who was there she found it odd, because Aoshi always seemed so indifferent to her girls. "I have information for you."

Yumi raised her eyebrow: "Come again?" – Information for her? She didn't remember calling for his services.

"One of your girls was attacked three days ago. Her name is Kaoru." – Aoshi informed her. – "I thought you might want to know that she is still recovering from the attack."

"Kaoru,Kamyia Kaoru was attacked? By whom?" – she immediately asked

"Udo Jin-Hei."

Yumi made a disbelieving look. That pig Jin-Hei… he used to cause her trouble every time he appeared on the restaurant. "But…why?"

"Don't know." – he replied.

"No one else asked for her in this last three days?" – she asked believing that a certain Hitokiri would be searching for her.

"No." – Aoshi wasn't a very talkative man, after all he was the one who was there to find answers not her.

Another animal… When Kaoru dind't came to work on Monday, she found it odd, but after sometime she heard Battousai left the town along with a woman, off course she assumed that woman was Kaoru… "You must bring her here. We will take care of her." – she immediately said.

"No."

"Why?"

She cared about the girl, that was obvious, but he knew she was safer on his castle, also he wanted some questions answered before ever thinking of letting her go. "She can't be moved because she is still in a coma state. And even if she wakes up the doctor says she will need at least a month without moving around in order for her wounds to heal properly."

She stared blankly at him for a while. How bad was she after all? "I may see her tomorrow."

"There is no use for you to see her when she is still unconscious. I will send someone to call you as soon as she is awake." – he turned his back on her and walked away.

She stood there for a while thinking about the things he told her. Women are always a path to get to men…Tokyio was a path to revenge from Saito and Kaoru was probably used to get to Battousai... the difference between him and the Mibu Wolf was that he didn't even care.

_That would break her naïve soul… _she sighed. She had seen the story being repeated over and over. Women must never fall in love, or they became a toy in someone else's hand… she had learnt in the hardest way… Yumi made her way downstairs to the bar but in the middle of the way she felt someone was watching her. "I didn't knew you were here Saito."

"Who was the girl Jin-hei tried to kill?"

Jin Hei killed the woman he liked and that was still driving him crazy because all he wanted to do was to kill him, but as he saw Aoshi there he had a feeling that it was just a little too late to do it. He had lost his chance. But he needed to put this on clean plates. "Who was this girl and what was the purpose of Jin-Hei on her death? "

Yumi knew well that some information must stay secret, after all, she didn't knew Saito True intentions: "I don't know. You must wait until she wakes up, as I will do." – she heard a noise coming from the bar and she immediately forget Saito and ran downstairs to know what was happening.

She stared and the mess her bar was.

"You bastard! How can you talk about our country like that?" Apparently one man was causing all this trouble. Yumi took a good look at him. Even with everyone else in the room arguing with him he seemed relaxed. He took a sip of his red wine and answered: "I am just telling the truth. But you are so blind for the lies they have told you, and the ideals of greatness you want so much to believe, that you refuse to see your real situation."

"You are a samurai! How can you say our country is weak? You should be the first one to be willingly to give your life for this country!" – another one shouted.

Once again his composure seemed unbreakable: "Oh… But I have given my blood for this country many times…" – once again he tasted the wine, but then, as he put the glass on the table he got up and walked in their direction. Then a smiled appeared on his lips: "But if you want to prove me wrong" – he put his hand in one of the swords on his hips: "If you really believe you are strong enough to defend this country, then… fight with me, and if you win, means I am the weak, and as weak people deserve to die, I shall die by your hands, but if not..."

Tension built up in the room because it doesn't matter of how they wanted to fight him they all knew him well enough to know they were no match for him. Sensing that, Yumi stepped into the scene: "Gentleman… my girls upstairs are bored because all of you seemed more interested in debating than in having real fun. " – she walked towards them – "Please, this subjects can wait, but my girls… well you know what they say… you should never leave a woman hanging on, because she will get tired and end up leaving..." – she stared at them… so eager to use her girls also as an escape to the discussion and as an excuse to their weaknesses.

She sighed watching them leave upstairs. She was tired of that life, of being strong all time… Also, even if she didn't show, there were a few things that scarred her. She shook her head. _Don't be silly. You've managed to take care of yourself for all these years… You're not going to get all sentimental and let fear drive you now._

"What kind of woman has the ability to drag a crowd of man like those, that minutes ago were craving to defend their ideals with all of their strengths" – she had fail to notice she wasn't alone in the room. The guy who started the fight a few minutes ago approached and sat next to her - "To totally forget the discussion and lead them to act the way she wanted them to? "

Surely he was one of a kind. His eyes were brown but she could swear she had seen them with tones of red as he challenged the others a few minutes ago, his presence was strong and imposing and his deep voice… it caused a shiver down her spine as he talked directly to her. But she was never an easy woman so she composed herself and answered: "One that knows men's nature very well."

He grinned: "We are not one and the same, Miss…"

"Yumi, Komagata Yumi."- she took a good look at him and decided to ask: "Do you really think that?"

"That what?" – he took a sip of the wine he was enjoying before.

"What you said about our country being weak." – It was strange to see a man like him, a samurai, a symbol of the nation, talking about his country in such a disrespectful way, but, she could easily made his words hers.

"I am a man of my word. If I said that it's because I see things that way." – the way he looked at her was so intense. He wasn't forcing himself to please her by all means, he was just being himself, talking to her like she was equal to him.: "And I can tell you agree with me."

His assumption made her smile: "Do you? And why so you assume that such thing?"

He enjoyed the wine in his mouth for a while and then, he licked his lips and look at her intently: "Because you're no naïve, your cleverness and intelligence made you own them. You made them respect you, but you don't like them, not even a little. You know they are only pieces on a chess game."

She laughed:"A chess game? That's something I never learnt to play!"

He laughed as well: "Oh yes you do… You may not know But you are the owner of the game."

She stared at him in disbelief. Why was her heart beating faster? Was this place getting hot?

"How may you call you?" – she desperately needed to know his name, to know something more about him.

"Makoto, Shishio Makoto."

**::::::::::::::**

For the first time in years he was physically tired. They walked for two days without stopping and she wasn't the best companion in the world. In opposition of Kaoru, this woman was quiet, more like a feminine version of himself. But that annoyed him, because he wanted something to distracted him, something to take his mind away from the woman he left.

_"I need you to stay away from a while, we are all going to different places from now on. You should wait until I call you again. I am sending Tomoe with you because a couple call less attention than a man alone…people will assume you're just married and moved into town to start a new life. It will be safer. "_

He remembered Katsura's words. He never talked to him directly about what happened with Kaoru… he never told her she was the one betraying them, but also because he never believed she was alone on that. And, if someone needed to be punished that person wasn't Kaoru, but the one who forced her or lead her into play such a dangerous game.

Once again she was monopolizing his thoughts.

_"I have the info you asked." – Saigoro took him apart from the others_

Since he searched for her at the restaurant but he found out she wasn't there, Kenshin secretly asked Saigoro to use his sources to at least know where she was staying at. When the old man told him what happened the samurai felt a huge guilt. On top of everything he had orders to leave the town… How was he going to take an eye on her from so far?

_::_

_"You must not pass from here on. My job is to protect this castle, Battousai." –_ Kenshin wasn't in the mood to talk… The masked man was just obeying orders, but Kenshin needed to do that before leaving…

_"Hannya… I must not forget your name." – _Kenshin pointed him his sword_ – "You're a very skilled fighter, but I have something very important to do. And you're in the middle."_

They were fighting for a while, and Kenshin already had various opportunities to kill him, but these people were taking care of her, so he refrained himself.

_"Then you have to take me down." – _the answer was clear. He needed to find a way to knock him down without killing him. "I will."- Kenshin replied.

As he used do ryo sen in order to make him lose his balance Kenshin striked the man's throat and he fainted.

_:::_

He was sure that was her room, because that sweet scent of jasmine was coming from there. Kenshin opened the door and stepped in.

Kaoru was sleeping. There was no smile on her face, like she used to have. Even when she was sleeping sometimes he found her smiling, but now, her expression was changed. She was in deep slumber and probably wasn't going to hear a word of what he was about to say, but he needed that to calm his tortuous soul.

He kneeled beside her, his eyes focused on her face: "I am sad things ended up this way. But it was the you wanted to be… You know, part of your mission has succeeded, because half of me died on that day Kaoru. " – he shook his head to the contradictory feelings inside of his chest. "I still… I still love you." – as his fingers touched her skin he desired her to be awake, so that he could take a look into her eyes again and realize what went through her mind to do something like that: "I am keeping this hope… that maybe someday your actions will not hurt me anymore and I will be able to search for you again." – he took a look at her trying to figure out what kind of wounds she could have, as he heard it was a violent attack, but since all of them were concealed from his eyes he had nothing else to do but wish she could recover soon: "I am sorry for not being there to protect you and kill that animal who did this to you… but I heard someone else did my job…" – he grabbed her hand, and as he pulled her to kiss her palm her sleeve slide back and he was able to see a laceration on her arm, caused by a sword. He gritted his teeth in anger:_ "A_nd it doesn't matter how devastated that mades me feel because I wanted to do it myself, I am glad such person (Jin-hei) is not walking around you anymore."

"I will move on with my life as I know you will do to yours." He approached his face to hers and kissed her cheek. There were so many things he wanted to say, but he was bound both by his job and his honor not to let his feelings control him. Half of him hoped her to wake up but the other half was afraid of that… so he got up and walked to the door decided to leave, but stopped just to look at her one more time. His next words sounded heavy on his heart because usually you only tell them to someone you lose to death.

"Goodbye… anata."**  
><strong>


	10. Chapter 10

**First of all, I want to thank Lydia the tygeropean and mysterious person101 who reviewed last chapter. Althought the few reviews I noticed several followers... I think that's good.**

**I want to take this chance to thank everyone who is reading this story since Chapter one, also the ones that point me my mistakes and help me to improve. I was having some difficulties to modify the chapter after I post it, but I think I finally realize how to do it. **

**Please feel free to comment and give me your opinions. I love to read your reviews, if they are not offensive in any way, of course. :-)**

**Chapter 10 - Ways to Deception **

Kaoru forced her eyes to open. Her vision was still blurry… it has been so long since the last time she opened her eyes. She was sleeping more than usual… it was probably because of the medicine they gave her in order for her not to feel the pain. She looked at the door and saw a man wearing a white mask. She blinked to realize if what she was seeing was true but as vision cleared he wasn't there anymore. _Great! I am imagining things…_

_What happened to me? _– Once again she closed her eyes and forced her mind to remember the last events. There was one she couldn't forget for sure. _He sent me away from his house. _After that things weren't very clear in her head, but Kaoru could remember there was a man wearing a hat and he tried to kill her... she could remember his voice and his words, but his face was still indistinct… he attacked her several times, she remembered she prayed for Kenshin to be there, she prayed for him to come and save her from this mad man… but no matter how hard she prayed he never show up… and when she thought she was about to die…_"I will not harm you…" _– he appeared… her rescuer…

She opened her eyes again and he was standing right next to her.

"You're finally awake." – he spoke. His deep blue eyes locked on hers. "My name is Shinomori Aoshi."

"I am sorry for the trouble I caused you. And thank you for taking care of me." – she replied. Then she noticed she hadn't introduced herself yet. – "My name is Kamyia Kaoru."

He nod.

She sighed. "How long did I sleep?"

"Two weeks." –his answer shocked her. For her it seemed it happened just a few minutes ago. Two weeks was much more than what she expected.

"You woke up in the other day, but the doctor decided to put you back to sleep again." – he explained.

Feeling the urgency of solving her situation with the red-haired samurai, and realizing that the clock was ticking against her, she tried to stand in a sitting position but he stopped her. "You must not move. The doctor says you're not allowed to go anywhere until a month passes."

Every news he gave her were terrifying her even more: "A month? No! I can't wait a month!" – she tried to get up again but he placed his hands on her shoulders. "Wait.I need some answers from you." Kaoru obeyed. He had that right, after all he saved her, and if that was the condition for letting her go, she would give him all the answers he wanted.

"Why did Jin-e tried to kill you?" – he asked as she calmed down.

"Jin-Hei?" – Kaoru's mind tried to associate the name to a face. "You're talking about the man who attacked me?" –she assumed and as Aoshi nod as she continued – "I don't really know." – even if she was telling the truth, for him, it would seem as if she was hiding something. She needed to clarify things: "I think they framed me… I don't know why he wanted me dead, but the way he spoke to me made me realize it had something to do with Kenshin."

"Himura Battousai?" – he already knew she was connected to him in anyway but there were some loose ends in that story that he needed to tie.

She bit her bottom lip. Should she disclose that information to him? He saved her but she knew nothing about him. Was he a dangerous man? Could he be Kenshin's enemy?

He could almost read the thoughts on her mind. "You don't have to be apprehensive about me. I have no interest on Battousai as long as he stays out of my way. I am just trying to understand what happened. " – her eyes focused on her, but he was a hard man to read… she couldn't understand if he was being totally honest,- but… she sighed- he saved her life, and the least she could do was to give him an explanation for the situation he found herself into.

"Someone told him lies about me." – she stared at Aoshi and his silence made her understand that she would have to disclose the entire story for him, otherwise he would think she was lying: "I was having dinner with him when Kenshin went to the outside to talk with one of his friends from Ishishinshi. Everything was doing well, but when he came back inside, he accused me of lying to him... of being an imperialist…" – it was hard to bring back all of his accusations, but the one that hurt her more: "He accused me…of betraying him…" – she sighed and looked at him. Aoshi just nod his head, now he understood. "Then, I left his house… after a while that man you call Jin-Hei appeared and his words made me realized that I was framed. I just don't understand… why me?" – she looked up at him but he gave her no answer.

_I need to leave and ask for Yumi's help, she probably knows someone who can help me . I need to understand why they pushed me away from Kenshin and as soon as I realize the motive… sooner I can show him how wrong he is…_

Aoshi on the other hand was wondering the same thing but in different perspectives. The whole scenario appeared to be a plot… but surely against Battousai not her… _If they framed her, then that means she is an important piece of the game, even if she doesn't realize it. I need to go deeper into this story. _"I don't understand…"

Kaoru looked up at him. If he was asking for more explanations… she … he wouldn't hear anything more from her since she knew nothing besides what she already told him.

His hand rubbed his chin as he seemed to be thinking for a while, then he looked at her: "So he didn't believe in you."

Kaoru looked down. Painful but true. _He should have talked to me first, before jumping into rash conclusions. But no. He decided to believe his "friend" instead of me, and didn't give me the chance to explain and prove him they were lying to him._ His lack of trust and disrespected for her feelings was what hurt her more.

Aoshi could see clearly how that matter affected her. So he decided to give her a break. She was fully awake for the first time since the attack and he was asking her too many questions. He didn't want her to collapse, so he decided to slow down. And probably leave her alone, so that she could settle down her thoughts. "You can stay here as long as you want. But as soon as you get better I advice you to get away from the city."

"I can't leave this city." – that was her immediate her answer. "Not now."

"Off course you can't. You're too injured and must stay here until you get better." – he answered but he felt she had something to say about that too.

"I can't stay here neither." – she made an effort to get up but felt a sharp pain on her back that made her fall back on the futon again. She flinched as it seemed her flesh was being slashed again.

Aoshi approached her and helped her to lay down. Whatever her reasons were, they were strong enough for her to almost ruin the doctor's work. "Why?" – he stared skeptically at her. Kaoru winced again in pain. Her back was seriously injured, she assumed, since her every move caused her different kinds of pain. "I need to prove…" – she stopped talking to breath for a while… "I Need to prove they're lying…"

"You will not prove a thing if you decide to behave like this. You will end up dead instead." – his tone was harsh and cold. The girl shivered as she looked at him. Kaoru felt like crying but fought hard against it. She needed to be strong. "I know you don't understand! But I need to tell Kenshin that he is in danger!" – Kaoru craved her elbows on the futon forcing her upper body to stay up.

The Okashira stared at her in disbelief. She was dumped by him, she was in pain partly because of him and yet she was still worrying about him. What could lead her to act like this around a man? An Obsession maybe?

"He left to Otsu." – it was a test… telling her the truth in exchange of knowing what she really felt around Battousai. Kaoru stares at him blankly: "Who?"

"Battousai. He left to Otsu." – he confirmed. She hid her face away from him, she was pretending to be strong, pretending that information didn't affected her but he noticed she was gloomy_. She cares about him after all_.

"Do you know the reason he left?" – she asked.

He shook his head negatively. Then, he got up and walked to the chest of drawers and took a paper from one of the drawers and started writing something on it : "I am going to tell the doctor that you're awake. Plus, I will make sure you stay here enough time for your wounds to heal properly. It would be a waste of my time to save you only to let you die because of your stubbornness."

Saying that, he went away, leaving a very confused Kaoru behind.

**:::::::::::::::::::::::::**

As the sunlight warmed her skin Yumi slowly woke up. As she regain her conscience she immediately searched for her last night companion… but the right side of her futon was empty. He wasn't there.

She sighed wondering if he was just a dream hence she thought a man like him wouldn't just exist. She got up and stopped in front of her mirror, gazing at herself. The white skin of her shoulders contrast with the black fabric of her robe. Their conversation came to her mind and he became the owner of her thoughts. Last night, he made her feel like no man before. He made her want more, crave for more. He was no ordinary man. No ordinary man at all.

She sat in front of her dresser and stared at the gifts she just received from all of her old costumers… it was odd, she could remember their names and faces and connected them to their gifts, but she couldn't feel anything about them. They were just… men…

But Last night she felt… something different, she felt a flame burning inside her, like… she shook her head:_Don't get your hopes too high… he is a man after all. And he is out of the town since you've never seem him here before, so, now he is probably on his way back home and worrying about his own business, not even giving you a second thought…_

Yumi learnt that if you depend on your hopes and dreams you will get disappointed. So now she is a woman with her both feet on the ground. Dependably independent of others. And she would never put her trust on a man… not again.

Time to wake...

There was other issues that demand her attention and she needed to take care of them as soon as possible. She dressed herself ready for another day… It didn't matter what Aoshi said, she wanted to see Kaoru, or at least send her some clothes, she doubted they would have clothes on that castle... She would have to askYahiko to deliver him a message.

**::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::**

Kenshin stared at the outside. It is snowing again and the ground was dressed in white. He sees the kids playing with the snowflakes and their laughter made him smile. Feeling nostalgic, he steps outside just to touch the snow… so white and clean. Kenshin kneels down but as one of the children bursts in laugh he looks up at them again. Their happiness is so genuine, so pure… As his right hand touches the snow he feels the freezing cold that comes attached to it… _What? _Kenshin was startled as he look at his hand and instead of the white pure snow, he only sees vivid red blood dripping to the ground…

Red as his sins.

_How did I end up here? – _he remembered the day he joined Ishinshishi, Although anyone in the group believed him to be an advantage, Katsura on the other hand was impressed with his skills. And it was probably because he knew Kenshin was so young that he asked: "Are you aware than to protect the people of Japan and bring the new era, you will have to use your sword to kill?" as young Kenshin answered affirmatively he gave him permission to become a member of the group.

_I can't blame anyone… I made my own choices. No one hide the truth from me. I was so blind for my need to protect people that failed to notice that, slowly I end up turning myself a tool for their suffer …I must pay for my sins alone._

Tomoe sits beside him and as no word came from his mouth she decided to talk: "Dinner is ready."

Kenshin nod but remains as frozen as before. She notice the water from the snow on his hands: "You seem thoughtful, is something bothering you?...Do you miss the action?"

She thought he wouldn't answer, since his mind seemed to be so far away from there, but he replied immediately, and his voice had a touch of surprise, as if she was asking something obvious:** "**No. I like peace." - he glanced at her and then sighed understanding that his reactions made her feel confuse.

Tomoe stood quiet for a while, but then something came to her mind: "So… then… you must miss her!" – also she needed to know what happened to the girl. Kaoru seemed to be a good person and Tomoe's conscience was bogging her as she was afraid of what Iizuka could have done to her… "…I don't understand why she didn't came with you instead of me."

"That's a closed matter." – Kenshin got up as if the simple mention of Kaoru woke him from his inactive state.

If he cared for the girl… then what she was doing was even worse than what he did to her… "Her name was Kaoru, wasn't it?... I think she was a go…"

"Please!" – he stopped walking and looked back at her. His eyes hold a sadness she had never seen in a man before. "Don't say her name…"

Tomoe nod. Her chest was in a turmoil. She was part of a plot that caused someone else's death. An innocent's death. She was no better than Battousai anyway.

**:::::::::::**

"You must give up of that idea." – Yumi insisted again, she needed to make Kaoru understand that it was a waste of her time to even think of such thing.

Kaoru shook her head negatively. She was determined: "I must do this."

"Do you even know who you're dealing with?" – she was angry with Kaoru. How could she, that was barely recovering from an attack, thinking about getting into more troubles? "This people are dangerous, and you are at risk only for being alive… I am telling you something Kaoru, if you start digging too deep, is as sure as the sun rises every day as you will end up dead in the end of this story!"

"I need to prove him that I am innocent!" Kaoru yelled tired of explaining the same thing over and over. She covered her mouth regretfully. "I am sorry Yumi. I shouldn't have talked to you that way."

Her employer forced Aoshi to let her see her and was trying to help her in every way she could. She also asked Aoshi to let her stay in Aka so that she could help her from there, but he denied. It wasn't fair to treat someone who was trying to help her, in such an arrogant way.

But Yumi didn't seem to mind, instead she continued talking:"Listen to yourself! That's the point! You want to prove HIM, Kaoru. You're just worried about him, but he already made his choice." – she stopped talking for a while, wondering of how she would disclose that information to her without destroying her from the inside out…

Thinking twice… there was no beautiful way to say those things, and maybe if Kaoru felt the hurt of betrayal, she would give up from her idiotic plan and save herself from more troubles: "Listen, I don't wanna broke your heart in pieces but… I need to do it…"

Kaoru stared at her as if she already knew what Yumi was about to say: "I know he left to Otsu."

"With Iizuka's cousin - Tomoe." – Yumi added.

That last sentence caught Kaoru completely out of hand. At first she was about to ask her to repeat, but then she realized she was unable to speak. Her face paled and her mouth dried. Yumi placed her hand on hers sympathetic with her feelings… after all, she knew too well the hurt that came from betrayal… It could tear your soul apart… "This is a men's world Kaoru… and there's no chances for us… and all men are the same… not even one is different."

_He got over me so fast…. Was It because he thinks I betrayed him? _Whatever his reasons were Kaoru felt tempted to agree with Yumi. She had no value to him. She couldn't think of anything else rather than the hurt his actions were causing her, Physically and mentally.

First the attack, then, when she thought she could turn the situation around by proving him her innocence,Aoshi told her he was out of the town… Anyway she was ready to wait for him to come back and then show him the truth and maybe then, things could be just like before… but knowing he went away with another woman… that changed the entire situation…. Adding that to the fact that Tomoe was no ordinary woman… she was elegant and beautiful… more than what she could ever be. She felt like a knife was slashing her heart. _How could you, Kenshin?_

Yumi was reading the signs. Kaoru was trying to control herself not to fall apart in front of her, but she was failing miserably. Jealousy and hurt were written all over her face. "Sometimes we need to let it go…"

She raised her eyes to look at her. There was a part of her, that was so tired of this mess, that wanted to follow Yumi's advice, but the other half was stubbornly thinking of reasons to understand Kenshin's actions…

"Kaoru, you look exhausted. You need to rest." – Yumi was caring for her as if they were close friends. Maybe it was just feminine solidarity. "Do you feel pain?"

"Just in my back." – _and in my heart. _she added mentally. "Thank you so much for the clothes and for the advises." – Kaoru made her best smile, she didn't wanted Yumi to worry about her, she would be fine.

"I ask Aoshi to take you to Aka, so we could take care of you but he forbid me." – she talked as she was irritated with his actions – "He seems a little overprotective around you."

Kaoru eyebrows knitted together. "I rarely talk to him… and every time I do… our conversations are very short and only about the essentials…" – If Yumi was insinuating he had an interest on her, that would be totally untrue… although he saved her and gave her all the medical cares she needed… Kaoru was sure that he had no second intentions around her.

"I see." – Yumi nod – "Don't let your guard down. We never know what will happen when it comes to men."- she got up.

"Why do always act suspiciously around men?" – Kaoru asked. Yumi seemed to have a grudge against the masculine type, what is strange due to her kind of life.

She got up and get herself ready to leave: "That's a story I will tell you at another day… Do you need anything else?"

Kaoru shook her head: "No, thank you Yumi, you were kind enough by bringing me these clothes and give me your advises. That is all I need, for now."

:::::::::::

**::::::**

**::::::**

When Yumi arrived at Aka, soaked from the rain, she was far from imagining that the first thing Haruka would tell her was that someone sent her a gift. "A gift?" – she raised her eyebrow in awe.

"Are you getting deaf?" – the other woman asked playfully – "Yes, a gift, a souvenir… " – she threw her a towel.

Yumi smiled at her friend's mood: "You seem very happy today, what happened?"

The other asked: "Nothing special. It's just that…" – as her eyes filled with proud and contentment Yumi was sure little Yahiko had something to do with it. "Yahiko got his first official job."

"Really? That's really nice." – Yumi knew Haruka's difficulties since her husband's death. Being a widow in this country wasn't easy… She was still young and beautiful, she could remarry and have a new life. But no proud-Japanese man would take a woman with a child that wasn't his own. "What is he doing?"

"Errands, deliveries, everything they ask him to." – she answered – "It's not the best job in the world but it's already a beginning."

"Of course it is. I am happy for you Haruka, you raised your son alone and he is becoming a responsible adult." – The image of the young Yahiko appeared on her mind and she smiled at the idea of seeing that boy becoming a man. "Yahiko-chan will make you proud someday."

"I hope he doesn't hear you call him that." – Haruka glanced at Yumi – "He says that now that he works he is already a man, and we must call him Yahiko-san!"

Both woman burst into laugh. "He really is full of himself!"

"And he is only twelve, imagine what I will have to put up with when he reaches the twentie's!" – Haruka replied. "He sure gets that from his father."

Yumi stop laughing and nod. Yahiko's father was a well-known samurai, as far as she heard, he was a good husband for Haruka and loving father to the boy. He died doing his job and as honorable as that was, it didn't erase the fact that his wife was left alone with a child to raise. Haruka never worked in her life before, and became desperate when she found herself in that situation…. She came to Aka looking for a job…That's when they met. Ten years passed since that day and Haruka learn how to be independent, self-sustainer. But Yumi could tell, by the sad look she had on her eyes sometimes, that she missed her husband now as much as she did ten years ago.

"Yes, because anything else, he has from you." – Yumi end up the conversation – "I will be leaving to my room." _I need a warm bath. Winter came in full-strength. If is still raining like this he will have to get ready for the floods…_

As she entered her room to get her yukata, she found the gift Haruka had mentioned. A red bottle with the symbol of one of the most expensive sake's _and_ a letter. She opened the envelope and read the short message. Her fingers slip through the letters of his name…

**_Keep it for the next night we will spend together. A luxurious drink for someone who is much more than just a stunning woman. _**

**_Makoto Shishio_**

** ::::**

**Two weeks later**

He stared at his face. Iizuka was hoping to find a very distressed man, but he seemed calm."How are you doing around here?"

"Fine, it's peaceful in here. Everyone thinks we are farmers." – Kenshin wasn't missing the battle field like he was expecting him to do.

"Things are getting better back home. I think that soon you will be back." – Iizuka wanted to know more about his life in Otsu, but Kenshin wasn't a very talkative person, and, since that day on his house, when he told him about the Kamyia girl, he seemed even less talkative than before.

"Good."

But he needed to know if he was still caring for her. He needed to kill whatever feelings he had for the girl, so he decided to spread some of his poison into the Hitokiri's heart. "Do you know? That Kamyia girl? she is living in Shinomori Aoshi's castle… She surely likes influential man…"

"Do you have anything else for me?" – Kenshin's answer was immediate. Iizuka couldn't tell if he was running from the subject because he didn't cared or because it affected him too much..

"No." – he replied.

"Then, I shall go. This is a small village and strangers are noticed immediately. You should leave so that I can keep up with the disguise." – he walked away with no more words.

Kenshin was pretending Iizuka's words about Kaoru doesn't hurt him but they sure had an effect on him._What kind of relationship can she have with Aoshi? _ He saved her. Something inside him remembered. _Could she be developing feelings about the Okashira leader? _ He never thought about Kaoru falling in love with another man after he left, and it had a bitter taste this felling he was experiencing. If that's so, then she was forgetting him too easy_. Maybe everything is true… maybe she didn't love me; maybe, I was just someone she fooled._

He felt he was truly deceived by her.

**:::::::::::::::::::::::**

**:::::::::::::::::::::::**

Kaoru found a diary among the things Yumi brought her, maybe the woman understood how frustrated she was and decided to give her something to help her to relieve the stress, and althoughKaoru had nothing special to write, she decided to give him a proper use.

Since no one understood her, she would put on the paper her feelings. Unlike people around her, the paper wouldn't mind if her feelings were contradictory or irrational… This book would be her witness and secret keeper.  
>But to write her feelings she needed to understand them first. What was she feeling? A bunch of words came to her mind but the one that described better her real situation was….<p>

**Deception…**

_It's gonna rain…  
>"That's good for me…"<br>I force myself to believe.  
>To make me forget,<br>To wash away my full of emptiness memories,  
>Of that moment… the moment you let me go. <em>

_The raindrops,  
>I hear them fall,<br>Hitting hard on these walls  
>In which I find myself willingly trapped.<em>

_But,_  
><em>I feel them so close<em>  
><em>Almost wetting my body<em>  
><em>Almost making me freeze,<em>  
><em>Almost…<em>

_Yes, just and only almost,_

_I should know,  
>It must end,<br>My childish dream is over_

_It's just as if  
>All the doors are shut down,<br>and all the curtains closed not allowing me to see any light.  
>I found myself alone.<em>

_And Is still raining on the outside,  
>Steadily, Persistently,<br>Suddenly… a cold wind freezes my once heated up heart…_

_And I wish to walk outside in the middle of the storm  
>I wish to soak my hair,<br>To feel my body trembling_

_I want to forget all the things that I once promised never left behind.  
>I want to run away and never found myself again<br>I want to know which way I should go to get lost_

_I wanna be exhausted,  
>So I can finally forgive myself for giving up.<em>

_I spent my strengths,  
>All of them, looking for someone<br>Who was impossible to reach._

_I gave myself,  
>For a dream,<br>An illusion,  
>A lost childish fantasy<br>A lie…_

Hate wasn't the word to describe her feelings, since she knew she could never hate him. But all she could remember of him now were the last moments they share and his words of accusation.

Did the news of her almost death reach the samurai's ears? Kaoru preferred to believe that he knew nothing, than to think he knew and never came to see how she was doing. She thought about all the things she wanted to say, no… say no, shout to him, she wouldn't give him a chance to say a word!

She closed the book as tears rolled down her face. Her words were acid like the flavor of the medicine she had on her throat… The medicine that meant to take her pain away, but let this horrible taste that reminded her of current state, that reminded her of him.

Then again...

Deception

**:::**

After his journey from Otsu to Edo, Iizuka was hoping to ear news about Katsura's death, but as he meet them he got disappointed. "I put Battousai away from you and still you weren't able to kill Katsura!" - Iizuka was really on the edge, since Katsura was not a fool and sooner or later he would realize that the excuse he used to put Kenshin away from him was a fake. Kenshin was a trust worthy man and since he went away his brother Saigo was killed, what wouldn't probably happen if the red-haired samurai were there.

"He is well guarded. This new bodyguard… he is as strong as Battousai or even stronger." – the man in front of him replied – "Also it was difficult to find where Katsura and Okubo were." – Kojiro added.

"Don't waste my efforts! You have to kill them as soon as possible. He is thinking about calling Himura back, and if he does that you will never be able to finish the job. Also, if he meets that Kamyia girl he must discover the truth and that will end up bad for me..." – There was still a chance of him to believe her story."Maybe you should kill her once and for all." – that was the only way to totally get rid of the problem. Kojiro rolled his eyes, this fear about the girl was irrational, she was only a woman, what harm could she do?

"I will take care of that. I just need her to leave Aoshi's wing…." – The other man took his sword from the sheath and stared at the blade. " He saved her from Jin-Hei…. But if I caught her alone…. She is as good as dead. She can't be that lucky anyway…"

**:::::**

**Who is Katsura's new bodyguard? Guess? **

**I want to hear it from you.**


	11. Chapter 11

**Hi everyone!**

**Sorry for the delay. Now that i've finished the second part of this story in portuguese, I think i'll have much time to update this one. **

**Also, maybe my chapters are going to be smaller, but updated with more frequency. **

**Thanks to those who reviewed and favorited this fic.**

**Hope you to enjoy this chapter.**

**::**

**Chapter 11 - Running Away from Me**

She sat at his side on the futon.

Sakura knew her husband too well. We was lost in thoughts probably because of the last events. In a short period of time, they were attacked several times, and in one of those attacks his brother Saigo end up being killed. Because of that, they were forced to constantly change their whereabouts and Sakura was afraid of the effect that constant rush would have on the kids.

In her point of view this increasing attacks only happened because they knew Ishin was fragile. Somehow the news about a traitor among them were spreading to the outside quickly and their enemies were striking at full strength hoping to destroy the group. Worst of all, the problems not only came from the outside, there were internal problems as well.

Since Katsura, Okubo and Saigo knew there was a traitor they started questioning some members, and of course no one felt comfortable in that suspicion atmosphere.

"I don't know why Kenshin left." – Sakura made her point. Himura was her husband's personal bodyguard, with him out of the scene Katsura hired another samurai, one that sent shivers down her spine. She heard he was very skilled but his eyes were ferocious showing no sign of compassion or humanity.

On top of everything she didn't understood why Himura left so suddenly, and most of all she couldn't understand what happened to Kaoru.

Katsura sighed, that was probably a subject that crossed his mind more than once: "I trust Kenshin with my life, but Saigo and Okubo were worried about the news of a traitor between us, and after what happened to Kaoru…they decided to change the routines."

"But he is your bodyguard you should know better than them!" – It was innerving that the other two were making decisions like this about her husband's life. For Saigo it didn't end up well and she was afraid that the same thing would happen to Katsura.

"I Know, that's why I am asking him to come back." – He finally said. But there was a suspicion on his eyes when he turned to look at her: "You are missing Kaoru. That's why you're asking me about this, isn't it?"

She got up from her sitting position: "I don't believe Kaoru to be the traitor." – she said, hands on her hips.

"Neither do I darling…" – he finally says

Sakura sits again on his side and sighs: "I wanted to go to the restaurant to see how she is doing, but we are trapped in here like mice!" – she felt the urgent need to talk to Kaoru ever since she heard Kenshin telling her husband about the betrayal and the reason he sent her away from his place. Katsura had avoid telling her about Kaoru being attacked because he knew she would request to see her immediately… so she knew nothing about that.

"On the day he left Kenshin seemed very upset and I didn't want to touch on the wound telling him my thoughts on the matter, also I knew how Saigo and Okubo would react, so I decided to wait."

"I need to talk to Kaoru." – she immediately said

"Wait Sakura, just be patient." – he put his hands on hers. Katsura knew he had to tell her before she would hear it from anyone else. "I didn't let you go and visit Kaoru because she wasn't at Aka."

"Then, where is she?" – she lifted her eyebrow.

"She is at the castle, protected by Shinomori Aoshi." – the last sentence made his wife blink twice. "Come again?"

He started to explain: "Kaoru was attacked in the same night she left Kenshin's house, and…" – he was immediately cut off by Sakura."What?" – Sakura couldn't believe that he had hide that from her. "Shhh.." – he reached for her hands – "Please calm down. She is ok now, as far as I know Aoshi saved her. I didn't tell you because I was sure about your reaction."

"But, don't you see? Kaoru saved my life! She saved our kids! I owe her that much." – she stared at him in disbelief. Why couldn't he see that?

"Sakura, we don't know…" – he rubbed his temple. " What if that heroic gesture was a fake? What if it is a plot from the beginning?" – Katsura replied.

She shook her head negatively: "I saw the fear on her eyes when she put herself in front of that swords." – her voice was solid as she could put her hand on fire for her friend and be sure that she wouldn't get burnt. But she knew that sentimentalism wouldn't work on her husband, so she used logic: "Since Kenshin went away things got worst! Maybe we are looking at things on the wrong perspective." – she fixed her eyes on him and her voice went low: " Maybe, whoever want us you dead is faking all of this just to make you vulnerable, just to see an opening on your defenses, or, do you think that this lack of trust from you three won't put the trust and respect of your followers on the line? "

He kept quiet for a while. Katsura had already thought about that, she just put his thoughts out loud. As head of the Chousu he made a vow of protecting innocent people. In this new era there would be no more powerful people crushing the weak ones. No more.

What if, Kaoru is innocent?

**:::::::::::::::::::::::::::**

She smiled, finally Aoshi agreed to let her take a walk to the outside. But with one condition: Hannya should escort her. Kaoru didn't mind, she had learnt that no matter how scary these guys looked like sometimes, they weren't a threat to her. She could almost laugh at the way they acted towards her, always trying to be so polite, as if she was a princess or something… well they already had a castle… so…

The man walking beside her was remembering the fight he had against Battousai and wondering why was she so important to the red-haired samurai. He saw concern on his eyes on the day they fight. Could a demon like him have feelings? He should know better that men like them can't afford to show emotion… Because it would end up destroying the people that they are connected to. Miss Kaoru was just lucky that his Okashira was nearby as she was attacked.

"Hannya, is that your name, right?" - her soft voice shook away his thoughts.

He bowed his head a little: "Yes my lady…"

"Don't call me that, just Kaoru please." – she walked slowly at his side appreciating the gardens around the castle.

"I am sorry, but I cannot do that, my lady, it's a signal of respect both for you and my master." – he said**.**

She sighed. Kaoru was happy to see the day light again, but she didn't wanted to bother anyone so that could have her moment of freedom. "I am sorry you have to baby sit me… but there was no way Aoshiwould let me go to the outside alone… and I was tired of being inside of the castle."

She seemed sincere, and quickly she gains his respect: "I do whatever my master tells me to."

Kaoru stopped at the stop: "Wait a minute…Did you said…Master?"

"Yes My Lady. Aoshi is the head of the Oniwabanshu. He is our master because he personally trained all four of us." Behind his mask he smiled at the shock on her face: "But he is so young? In order to be a master don't you need to achieve a certain age? He is probably four or five years older than me… How could he be a master?"

"At the age of fifteen master showed great skills and aptitude, so much, that our previous lieder Okina, passed his testimony to him, as a sign of trust, he made him the head of the most powerful secret organization in Japan." - Kaoru opened her mouth so much that for a while she thought her jaw was about to fall to the ground. "That's outstanding." – she managed to reply, still in awe with the things she heard.

He nod. She was easy to read. No signs of hidden intentions or mischievousness. He could clearly see it. She was the vivid colored character on the black and white canvas. Obviously she didn't belong there, she fell into the picture only to contrast with the rest of the people in it.

"Oh… It so beautiful…"

While he was lost in thoughts she took a few steps away to look at something. She slowly kneeled beside a purple/violet flower. _This field is almost naked because the winter is already here… How can this little flower stay alive? _She gazed upon the flower and in her mind his eyes appeared. His soft loving violet eyes. And she shivered a feeling of sadness and nostalgic got control of her.

Hannya could see the cut from Udo's sword, the one that went all the way up to her neck. Not even her kimono could hide that. _A woman should never be treated like this, even more one so fragile as she seemsto be. _"The flower that blooms in adversity is the most rare and beautiful of all." – he says.

But instead of her usual smile she just stared blankly to the horizon, and he could see she was fighting against to control herself: "Well, no matter how beautiful it is Hannya, the rain and snow will eventually destroy all the beauty, and end up killing it." – She had no faith on her future with Kenshin, the news about him and Tomoe had killed most of it.

"A storm is coming you should go back inside." – Aoshi appears from behind them. Hannya had already felt his master's presence. He was observing them since few minutes ago.

Kaoru nods as she turns to look at Aoshi, and then she bows her head: "Thank you Hannya for escorting me."

He bows back: "My lady."

When she leaves with his master, Hannya stares back at the flower with her words echoing in his mind: _No matter how beautiful it is Hannya, the rain and snow will eventually destroy it…_

**:::::::::::::::::**

Aoshi thought that Kaoru would be happy after the walk, but She is strangely silent. As if for some reason something or someone changed her mood. "How are you felling?" – he asks

"Most of the times I have no pain." _Except for my soul which is still bleeding. – _she mentally adds.

He nods, sensing her low energy and he wonders what in the world would change so drastically her mood. "What do you plan on doing after you get better?"

"I will carry on. I will get back to my job at Aka." – once again, no smile.

How could something so beautiful bring her heart so much pain? Since his ghost appeared on her mind she was unable to block the sadness. She missed him after all. She wanted to hate him for treating her so bad and for misjudging her, but instead Kaoru found herself desiring to see him, longing to share her feelings with him.

_I am going help you to find your friends Kaoru... _a sad smile appears on her lips as she remembers the promise he once made. Kaoru lowered her head so that Aoshi couldn't realize how miserable she was feeling.

"What about Battousai?" – his question couldn't match her thoughts more.

"What about him?"

Aoshi 's eyebrow lifted in surprise. Was Kaoru learning how to disguise her feelings? "In the day you woke up you said you wanted to prove him your innocence."

"I have no way to prove that."

_Why are you acting like you're ready to give up, when I know you're not? _"What about the girl who is with him in Otsu?" – he knew he was pushing her, maybe a little too much talking about that, but he wanted her to speak her mind. That was the only way he had to know if she was planning to do something stupid or not.

She rolled her eyes: "What about her?" – _Why is he talking about Tomoe? Every time I think about them together…. Rrrhhhhg. _She mentally growled.

"Don't you find awkward that she appears at the same time you disappear?" – this time he stop to gaze at her. Kaoru's eyes widened: "Do you think she Is a part of their plan?"

Aoshi stuck out his hand and a few drops of water fell in it: "I was asking you."

She looks up to the grey sky: "I don't know."

He placed his hands on her back making her walk faster: "Do you even know who she is?"

As starts raining hard he took of his long gabardine and places it upon her shoulders: "Iizuka's cousin."

"Huhum.. I see."

Once inside, he follows her to her room, and before leaving her alone he asks one last question : "Do you wish to visit Aka tomorrow?"

This time her eyes showed surprise: "Really?"

He mentally congratulated himself for changing her mood: "I will personally take you there… I have some things to do at the city. I am going to send a letter to Yumi telling her to be there tomorrow at noon."

**:::::::::::::::::.**

As someone knocked on the door Yumi literally jumped from her chair. No one could see her visitor. She rushes to the door and opens it only enough for Yahiko to deliver her a letter. "From the castle to you." – the boy said.

She nods and quickly dismisses him, opening the envelope at the same time. Seconds later she stares at the her visitor: "Kaoru will be here tomorrow at noon. Maybe this is your chance."

**:::::::::::::::::**

This quiet life was everything he desired for years. He would be rejoicing except for the fact that something was amiss. Someone was amiss.

Kenshin couldn't help but think about Kaoru and Aoshi. He heard a lot of tales about this man, how smart and respectful he was. How could he gain the respect of people even older than him… Maybe Kaoru fall for his charm and strong character. Maybe she was vulnerable and…

"AHHH. Hey he hit me!" – someone from the outside yelled.

Kenshin runs to the window and sees a bunch of kids, two of them seemed to be fighting. Wanting to stop them he comes to the outside and quickly picks this new boy who is on top of the other punching him on the face. "Stop!" – he pushes him aside and looks at the one on the ground, his face red in the spots the other beat him and his lip his bleeding. "What happened here?" – he asks.

The other two boys pointed to the outsider: "We just asked if he wanted to play along with us."

He sighed. "Go to the woman at my house and ask her to give you the medicine on the green box. It will stop the swelling. " – the three of them nod and run towards his house. Then Kenshin turns back to the other boy and says: "If you didn't want to play you just had to say no." – he dind't said a word in replied, so Kenshin assumed he was afraid. "You don't have to… ahhh…" – as soon as Kenshin placed his hand on the boy's head, he immediately bite the samurai's right hand.

"Enishi!" – As Tomoe walks out, he let's go Kenshin's hand and runs to her throwing his arms around her.

_They know each other? _Kenshin finds it odd but decides not to interrupt. _Then… Now I am the one who has to find a way to stop the swelling. _

**::::::::::::::::::::::**

She looks at the red-haired samurai and sees him leaving. Polite as always he was allowing her to have some privacy. "You must be hungry, follow me I was just making dinner." – she says.

The boy couldn't stop smiling as his sister hugged him once again."What are you doing here Enishi?"

"It's time for your revenge." – he grinned happy to be a part of the plan.

Tomoe stood quiet for a while.

"We are going to crush this moron."

"Go home Enishi." – she was cold and distant. She needed to be if she wanted him to go away, otherwise he would never stop following her around.

He widened his eyes: "What's the matter? Why are you protecting him? He is your enemy!"

**:::::::::::::::::::::.**

Kenshin went to river and stood there for a while. The cold water would help to heal his hand.

_What a strange boy… _he thinks about what happened with the kids. They probably_ are brother and sister… But how could he know that she is here?_

Heavy footsteps woke him from his thoughts and as he sees Enishi approaching he walks to him: "Where are you going? It's almost time for dinner." – he says. He wasn't mad about what happened.

Enishi lifted his head and if his eyes could kill, Kenshin would be dead on the spot: "If only you had never existed."

**:::::::::::::::::::::::::**

As planned Aoshi takes Kaoru to the restaurant and excuses himself with some errands to do, leaving Yumi and Kaoru alone.

"I am so happy to be here again." – Kaoru says but Yumi rushes her to the upper rooms: "I am sorry dear, but someone is waiting for you."

Kaoru stops walking and forces Yumi to stop too. Fear written all over her face. "Don't be afraid, I wouldn't allow this conversation if I didn't trust the person on the other side." – the other woman assures.

_Who might be? Could it be? Could it be him? _As hope grows inside her chest Kaoru walks faster following Yumi.

The geisha stops in front of one of the rooms and stares at Kaoru: "Your visitor is waiting inside." – she places a hand on the girl's face: "I am happy to have you here too, and I wanted to talk to you, But I think this conversation is important than whatever I may tell you. Take note Kaoru: This is the only time I will help you in your crazy plan, ok?"

Kaoru nod, almost didn't listening what she was saying. Her heart was pounding so much on her chest with the anticipation of seeing Kenshin… As Yumi slides the door to open, Kaoru sees the person who is waiting for her. As disappointment fills her heart, shock taints her voice:

"Katsura?"

**:::::::::::::::::::::.**

As Yumi leaves the room Haruka appears on the corridor and informs her that someone is waiting for her in the main room. Something inside her wishes that person to be Shishio… but she learn to control her emotions because most of the times they are mislead.

As the unpleasant scent of tobacco filled the area to the stairs, she didn't have to guess who was waiting for her. "Saito."

He turned, amber eyes staring straight at her: "I know the girl is here."

_This is getting dangerous… Saito and Katsura in the same building… It's madness. _"Yes, she is, but she is talking to someone now. And actually, she came with Aoshi, so, you shouldn't mind their business. " - she disguised the fear behind her words.

"I told you before. I want to talk to her." – he insisted. "I want to know the reason he tried to kill her."

"Listen, She is tired of telling that story over and over." _– And that would only hurt her more._

"Then, you must tell me yourself." – he finished his cigarette and place it on the balcony.

"I think it was because of Battousai." – she couldn't disclose much.

"So, she is Battousai's woman?" –They fought almost a month ago, and he felt that his victory was postponed_… if I manage to get close to her, maybe that will push Battousai to fight me again, once and for all._

"She is not your type Saito."

"I am not thinking about that. I am thinking that the puzzle just starts to fix." - Saito knew Jin-Hei killed Tokio Just because he stopped him from fighting Battousai. Then, maybe he decided to get revenge from Battousai by taking the life of this girl. In the end, just one action of his, end up hurting two innocent women. It was a shame Aoshi killed him. He would enjoy destroy Jin Hei.

"I will wait until the opportune moment to talk to her." – _But that won't take long… Because if you don't get me to her, I will find a way to get her._

"Thank you." – Yumi waits for him to leave to sigh in relief. _This is getting very, very dangerous._

**::::::::::::::**

They stay in silence staring at each other. Katsura was trying to decipher whatever passed on her mind, but he could only see a woman whose eyes showed hurt and pain. There were no signs of regret when she looked at him. That Could only mean one of two things. First: She wasn't regretted because she believed she did the right thing associating to the imperialist, or, Second: There was no reason to show regret because she did nothing to be regretful for.

"I heard you got pretty injured." – He took the first step into their conversation.

"I was taken care. I am fine now." – She was obviously being cautious. Kaoru didn't knew the reason of his visit.

He could sense her doubt. "I Talked to my wife last night … she says she doesn't believe you're the traitor."

Unlike the shy girl he met on the day Kenshin brought her, as she heard him mentioning Sakura, she immediately answered: "I am happy to hear that. Only meanw that she knows me well." – her voice showed Conviction.

"Forgive me for not sharing the same trust, but, we are in war Kaoru." – he glanced at her. Could he read her?

"I am not blaming you, am I?" – she wasn't rude… But a part of her wanted to be. " Anyway, you were not the one I expected to believe me against all odds."

He smiled involuntarily. "I see." – she was quite fierce, Even the great Himura Battousai would have a hard time dealing with this girl.

"Listen, Katsura, Aoshi will be here in minutes, and as far as I know, you fight in opposite sides, I don't want him to see you here and start a fight."

He understood her urgency and knew she was right: "Tell me what happened Kaoru."

Her voice made an arch. Didn't Kenshin told you? "You know what happened. Kenshin put me out because Iizuka told him I was a traitor!" – she was tired of that story.

He nod. _So Iizuka was the one that told Kenshin. _He took a mental note. "Sakura believes that you're not a traitor… can you explain me why?"

She threw her hands up exasperated. Was he making fun of her? He should ask Sakura not her! But she didn't want to be disrespectful so she restrained herself: "I Don't know… Women have a better sense of… like a sixth sense to these kind of things…"

"I see." - he absorbed her words.

Why was he here? What was his point? Was he worried about her? Or did he came to set her up? "Listen Katsura, sooner or later everyone will know I am not what they say I am… when the truth shows up." – she didn't even knew how she was going to do that, but she felt the need to show her determination. Maybe this way he would understand she was innocent.

His eyes sharpened: "You talk like you know who the traitor is. Can you explain me your plan?"

She immediately regretted her words. "I am sorry, the more you know, the dangerous it becomes. Just protect Sakura and the kids." – _I need to get away from here, I am making promises that I don't know if I will able to fulfill. _She turned around ready to leave the room.

"Kaoru you saved my family once, let me repay you." – his words stopped her.

She closed her eyes and sighed: "I don't want to involve you and your family in this. Also I don't need any kind of payment for what I've done." – she turned around and looked straight to him: " I did it because I believe that we must act following our principles. Because I still believe in values and moral as much as I think you do."

Katsura nod with his head. He heard almost everything he needed to hear. He wouldn't force her to say the truth, nor would he act impulsively based on her words, he needed time to think clear… also, he would make sure to send someone to lay an eye on her. If she acted to show the traitor we would want to know first.

He walks to the door but before opening it he steps back and stares at her: "Not only woman have a sixth sense on things… some man also do."

**::::::::::::::::::::::**

Aoshi stares at the man leaving Aka, he may be disguised, but he recognized him immediately.

_She just arrived and they are already after her. _he did nothing against him yet he would warn Yumi that was not pleased.

What would lead Katsura to leave his hiding place and come alone just to find Kaoru**?**

**::::::::::::::::**

**::::::::::::::::::::::::::**

Yahiko stared at the man in front of him. He knew who he was! Was the respectful Kogoro Katsura, Chousuhead asking his services?

"Please I need you to deliver this letter to a man in Otsu. His name is Kenshin Himura. You can't give it to anyone else, and no one else should know I was the one who sent you. And Don't worry you will be rewarded for your services."

Yahiko nod and left immediately. This was important.

**:::::::::::::**

**::::::::::::::::::::::::::::**

As Kaoru arrived to the castle, she couldn't stop thinking about the strange conversation she had with Katsura and his last sentence… Did that meant that he believes her?

"Oh." As she entered her room she immediately noticed the jar with the flower she saw on the outside the day smiled at the gesture.

_This way, neither the snow or the rain will destroy your beauty. Because you're protected. – _she thought.

**::::::::::::::::::::::::::::**

**3 DAYS LATER**

_Kenshin, I heard you are enjoying your peace, and although I don't believe that you're totally in peace, I am happy to know that you can find some in this wild times._

_But I am going to ask you to come back. Saigo was killed when you went away, and our enemies are gaining strength._

_The future of my family is now on your hands. _

_Also I made some investigations on my own and have some things I want to share with you…_

_As a friend I need you by my side. You're one of the few people I can trust._

_Kogoro katsura_

Kenshin dind't have to read the letter again. His loyalty to Katsura was absolute and if he was asking him to come back, then he would do it.

**::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::**

"It seems to be healing well." – the doctor said as he took one of the bandages from her back.

"So, does it mean I can come back to my routine?" – Kaoru asks.

_You are tired of being locked in here: _"Yes. You can. Just try to avoid picking up heavy stuff and at night leave the wound to breath."

"Thank you." – she said as the doctor got up.

"Miss Kaoru, you suffered a violent attack. You're lucky to be alive. To be honest, when I first saw you I didn't believe you would make it." – he didn't wanted to scary her, but he needed her to understand his point: "Your wounds are healing, but the major one, the one on your back will never disappear. And you will probably suffer because of that wound to the rest of your life. The medicine only helps to get relieve from the pain… But… But… you"

"Thank you doctor." – she replied understanding his words. Even if she wanted to, she would never forget that night. The night her life changed. "I will take care from here on. I assure you that no one else will ever hurt me like this once again."

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

She knew he was waiting outside the door. She learnt how to feel his presence. So Kaoru got up and opened it. As expected he walked in.

"He says I am fine."

He nod."The path your traveling is a very dangerous one. Are you sure you still want to do this?"

"Yes I am." – Kaoru thought he was going to try to change her mind, so his next words caught her out of guard: " Yukishiro Tomoe is no relative to Iizuka. She came to Edo after his fiancé's death - Kiyosato Akira, who was killed by Battousai."

Kaoru eyes widened.

"Statically no one would believe her to be a treat – that's your disadvantage; your advantage is that she keeps a daily diary." - To him it was easy to gather this information, to her it would be impossible: "This is my goodbye gift to you, Kaoru. But I warn you, you're dealing with dangerous people, you must be careful."

Finally seeing a light at the end of the tunnel, and Unable to contain herself Kaoru hugs him and thanks him for everything. "Not only you but to the other guys too. They were very kind in all the time I stood here."

As she releases him and he turns to search for her things to carry he notices the violet flower: "A secret admirer?" – he asks

She shrugged her shoulders and gave a small smile: "Just Hannya." – she grabbed the book he gave her in the first days on the castle: "Will you visit me on Aka?"

Still thinking about the flowers he answers: "Perhaps. Just don't do anything stupid to make me go there."

**:::::::::::::::::::::::::.**

Next day Aoshi sent Hyotokko and another boy to help Kaoru with the changing. She didn't really have many things besides the kimonos Yumi offered her, the violet flower and her notebook.

The tip Aoshi gave her last night was ranging on her hears all her way to Aka. If the woman wrote everything on the journal, maybe if she could put her hands on it…. That could be the only way to prove her innocence. – But how would she find that journal? She was sure that if she asked Aoshi he would help her but Kaoru didn't wanted to do that... he already did too much for her.

As she arrived Yumi helped her to unpack her things and warned her that a man named Saito would be searching for her anytime soon.

_Don't do anything stupid… _Aoshi words echoed inside her head…

**:::::::::::::::::::::::::::**

**Two weeks later**

Kenshin came as fast as he could. If he was alone he would had arrive at least three days sooner… But as soon as he reached Edo, he went directly to Katsura's house.

"Come dear, you must be tired of the journey." – Sakura lead Tomoe to one of the rooms, so that both man could have some privacy to talk.

"It's not save for you to stay here." – If Kogoro Katsura died all their efforts as a group would be in vain. All the blood, all the deaths… were for nothing. Kenshin didn't understand how he could put himself in a spot where he knew he could be easily find.

"I knew you were arriving today so I came back. Sakura misses this place." – Yes… Women had the abilityto make simple things went difficult. "And I have another bodyguard, as well." – Yes, Kenshin saw him as he entered the mansion.

"I am sorry for Saigo." – the samurai said.

"He died doing what he loved I think he must be happy now." – a small smile formed in his lips.

Kenshin was happy to be back. Not that he missed his job, but he was connected to this place… because of her. "What do you wanted to tell me?" – If Katsura had a new bodyguard, why was he calling him anyway?

But the Chousu lieder dodge the question: "You seem exhausted. You must rest. We talk tomorrow."

Kenshin eyebrows knitted together."Do you want me to stay here?"

"No, there's no need of that, at least not for tonight."- He knew Kenshin would respect his decision even if he didn't fully understand it: "I needed you not only to protect me Kenshin, but also to help me toconsolidate our compatriot's moral. You're a symbol of our cause, if they see you here, they faith is restored. But for tonight, you must rest."

"Thank you." – Kenshin nod and leaves Katsura with a felling that he is not telling him everything.

As he thinks about getting home, but something keeps bothering him and he doesn't know what it is. Stepping outside, his old friend Saigoro approaches and whispers something on his hear. Kenshin stares back at him for a while but then continues with his lonely journey, even more confused.

_ … She is back at work. You may find her at Aka…_

_ Why would Saigoro think that I want to see her? Why would I want to see her anyway? She fooled me and took advantage of my kindness!_

_I am not a desperate man, and as much as I care, I will not spend a second of my time to see her._

**::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::**

As days passed by Kaoru got comfortable with her routine at work. Her shift used to start early in the morning and end up at the middle of the evening. That way Kaoru had lots of time to herself, she could walk around town and visit the stores, which were things she avoid doing because she was afraid of what could happen. She had that strange felling that her movements are being controlled, and she didn't like that.

Today she was particularly tired. Haruka got sick and she had to cover her hours until late at night, and on top of all, work at night was a more demanding one, not only more costumers appear at that time,

but also Yumi made her wear a new and more expensive kimono. _You can't work at night with a regular one, you girls are part of the decoration of the place, so tonight you're dressing a kimono that matches the name of the restaurant._ She huffed remembering Yumi's words. So, when Yumiko told her she had a visitor, her mood became even worse.

_It must the man Yumi talked me about._

**::::::: **

_She is pretty._ – he thought. The long loose black hair contrasted the vivid red kimono. The sleeves of hercloth was long and had some shades of golden in it, her obi was gold as well. _Now I see what you saw in her, Battousai._

As he sees her approaching he presents himself. Kaoru shows no sign of surprise, and Saito realizes thatYumi should warn her about his upcoming visit.

"I know you're attack by Udo." – he simply said.

"Yes. Everybody knows that." – she answered tired of people acting with this secrecy. She was attacked, period. It was more than a month ago and she was tired of people asking her about that.

"I am here because he was one of my men." – his sentence catch her attention.

"If you're here to get revenge from your friend, I must say that usually I don't wish anyone's death, but he deserved what happened to him. He was a pig and a coward."

"Huhum…" – Saito lighted his cigarette in front of her face: "I agree with you." _– What a wild cat you areKamyia!_

_"_Do you?_" – _the look of shock on her face made him want to laugh, but he restrained himself.

"I should have been the one killing him, before he could hurt the people that we are supposed to protect…" – Although his indifference Kaoru could see through those golden eyes that he was talking for real. Then, an image snaps back into her mind. "You're the man who was here at the day Tokio was killed." – she said.

Forcefully ignoring her sentence he continued with his logic: "I knew Jin-Hei was out of control, but I never thought that he could start killing people randomly like this. So what happened to you is partly my fault." – he blew the smoke to the side and stared at her.

"I thought it had something to do with Kenshin." – _Tell me… It's a shame he kicked you out, isn't it?... Maybe he was just feeling lonely and used you until he founds someone… better…_ Her attacker words ranged inside her head.

"I said it was partly my fault." – he focused on her.

She waited for him to talk but he only stare, and she couldn't stand the weight those golden eyes put on her: "Please explain yourself."

"Me and Himura are enemies. Once I saw in the battlefield I knew we were meant to fight each other to death." – a smile appeared on his lips and Kaoru hated to think of what that meant. "Battousai was fightingUdo and had already strike his right arm in a way that was impossible for him to hold the sword. So, I pushed him aside and took his place in the fight. He was no match for him after all."

"What does that have to do with me anyway?" – she hated to think of Kenshin as a killing machine.

"He sought revenge from Battousai by trying to kill you." – he concluded.

She sighed. What a sadistic little man:"And by killing Tokio… he got his revenge from you." – Saigo eyes hardened. He wouldn't allow her to pity him. He was perfectly capable of dealing with the situation by himself. "You don't have to worry. I am fine now." – Kaoru answered. It was odd how similar their situations were. Tokio died because of Saito's enemies and Kaoru got hurt because of Kenshin's enemies.

"Is there anything you want me to do for you?" – he asked

Kaoru shook her head: "No, thanks."

"No favor in exchange?" – he lifted his eyebrow, in her situation she could have asked him at least for protection.

As he mentioned the word favor, something crossed her mind, something to do with Tomoe and her diary, but she shove the thought aside and shook her head negatively again.

Her indecision didn't go unnoticed to Saito. She had something to ask, probably didn't trusted him enough to do it. " If you remember something, ask Yumi she knows where to find me." – he said.

"Thank you." – she said.

**:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::**

As Kaoru was approaching her room, Yahiko told her someone else was waiting for her on the sighed. _What a long night. Who would be now? _She went all the way down again to find Aoshi waiting for her on the back of the restaurant.

A smiled appeared on her face as she saw him. "It took you two weeks… but you finally appeared."

"As far as I see, I wasn't the only one. I crossed Haijime in my way here." – he look straight at her and warn her: "You must be careful he is a dangerous man."

Kaoru shrugged her shoulders: "He just came because the man who attacked me was one of his group."

He nod. Saito must had something on his sleeve, he wouldn't bother to see her only to tell her of his fault on her attack. "He is one of the captains of the Shinsen. He is a powerful man. But dangerous as a hungry wolf."

She gulped. "I see." – If he was such a dangerous man, then, she shouldn't trust him…

"You look fine." – Aoshi changed his tone of voice. He developed a certain sense of protection around her, but he couldn't order her what to do. Kaoru seemed much more independent than other women he knew.

"Thank you." – She blushed. "How are the things on the castle?"

"The same." – he frowned feeling a strong presence. Someone was hearing their conversation and he was almost sure who that person was, but he kept talking to her: "How are you doing? How are you wounds healing?"

::

He didn't knew why his feet drove him there.

Kenshin wasn't planning on talking to her. He was going to take a look at her without her knowledge just to see if Kaoru was doing fine after the attack, but when he saw the tall man talking to her on the outside, the way she smiled and how Kaoru seemed so at ease with him everything went red.

Not to mention that she was dressed so differently. The kimono he gave her was nothing compared to the one she was using now, with it she looked so appealing so much mature… he felt he didn't recognize the woman he was seeing. Kenshin would have his doubts if she was truly Kaoru, if not for her eyes. That stood the same.

::::::::

Kaoru continued talking unaware of the tension building up in the air. "Better. Sometimes the clothes just makes them inch, other times the cold just makes them hurt more…but it's getting better with time. Thanks for the care."

Aoshi decided to strike: "I do care… and mostly when you're dealing with dangerous man like Saito andBattousai."

The mention of his self-made the samurai even more angrier and Kenshin didn't even wait for Kaoru to answer he show up immediately and gave Aoshi a sharp look: "You shouldn't speak about people on their backs."

Aoshi step up in front of Kaoru and faced the red-haired samurai: "Then you shouldn't give them reasons to talk."

Kenshin's hand flew to the hilt of his sword and Kaoru watch in horror as Aoshi showed his twin swords ready to fight.

How could he act like her savior? Shielding her from him? As if he could ever hurt her?!

"Stop it!" – Kaoru yelled putting herself between the two men extending her arms to separate them.

Kenshin didn't looked at her: "Step aside."

She shook her head and glanced at Kenshin : "No! No one is going to fight because of me." – Then Kaoruturned to Aoshi and murmured: "Please Aoshi leave."

He answered without taking his eyes away from Kenshin: "I am not leaving you alone with him."

That sentence only made Kenshin growl. _Who do you think you are?_

Kaoru felt like an ant between them:"Please…" – She almost begged. She was seeing Kenshin for the first time in more than a month and as she saw him, Kaoru immediately felt she needed a chance to explain him everything, and if he denied to accept, she would just tell him about Tomoe's diary and hope he would follow her advice. "Just leave I don't want you to fight because of me. Please."

Aoshi took a step back. He was waiting for an opportunity to fight Battousai even before he met Kaoru. He heard about how skilled he was and he wanted to prove he was stronger. But the look on her eyes made him retreat. "See you tomorrow." – he says to her and starts walking home.

She sighed in relief. Now, there was only Kenshin. But when she turns to him he turns his back on her and starts walking away.

"Wait!" – she started running after him "Kenshin please we need to talk!"

He stopped. Hope built-in her heart just to be destroyed seconds later: "You and I…"- she almost didn't recognize his voice as it was drenched with so much hate: "We have nothing to talk about… not now not ever." – and then he starts walking again.

**:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::**

**Please leave your comments.**

**Jou-chan**


	12. Chapter 12

Thanks to everyone who reviewed and help me with my grammar: kenkaofan; Lydia the tygeropean; lhaine07; Icy-Kitty117.

As I said before, my chapters will be shorter, but i will post with more frequency.

I hope you enjoy this chapter!

Thank you everyone.

**Chapter 12 – A Very Troublesome Night**

Shishio watches as the object of his desire walks around the city. Every man turns their head as she passes. He couldn't visit her in the last weeks because Katsura asked him to keep track of Kaoru's action. So it was a bonus that today Yumi decided to take a walk and took Kaoru with her.

::

"You're a very beautiful girl, you shouldn't be this miserable because of a man." – It wasn't the first time she told Kaoru that, but the girl was so attached to Battousai… Maybe he was her first love… And if that's the case, pulling her away from him would be a problem.

"It's just that his words… the tone he used to talk to me…" – Kaoru took a while to answer, as if gathering courage to speak the words out loud: "Made me feel that he hated me. It hurts so much Yumi…" – Imagining that he could hate her was painful but also another feeling started to emerge: "That sometimes I feel so angry with him." - her fists clenched and Yumi knew she was reviving the scene in her mind: "When I saw him there, I was so happy, I thought he came back so that we could talk, but then he and Aoshi were facing each other like they were about to start a fight, and when I managed to stop them he treated me like he was disgusted or something…"

Yumi smiled. She was naïve for not realizing she was the reason of their fight… In what concerned to Aoshishe didn't believed him to be romantically interested on her. Yumi knew the "kind" long enough to realize that he was protective about her but that would be all… but Battousai however assumed that Aoshi's protection meant something else, and didn't liked the idea. Which only mean he was still in love with her… or it could be just possession…

Anyway Yumi decided not to let her know of her thoughts. Kaoru needed to learn on her own."Just forget about that for a while and enjoy the walk."

She chucked recalling the man that came last night asking her about Kaoru. Too good Kaoru was too absorbed in her own thoughts that didn't noticed.

Apparently he thought she was a geisha just because she was working late at night… so he came to askYumi if she could talk to her. What if Battousai knew about that? She was sure he would be mad. "You know, you've impressed last night."

"Uh?" - Kaoru glanced at her totally unaware of what she was talking about.

But when Yumi was about to answer a familiar face crossed her field of vision "Look, isn't that the girl that went with him to Otsu?" – she nudged Kaoru's arm.

Kaoru's eyes followed the same direction of Yumi's. Then she saw her, with the usual white kimono and long loose black hair."Yes, she is." – Something inside her chest was burning… she needed to admit she was jealous of this woman.

What was she doing here anyway? – _Well Kaoru the place is public… - _she reminded herself. It was then when Kaoru noticed something that made her confused. Tomoe walked with her head down as if she felt she was inferior to other, and she when she eventually looked up… her eyes… were full of regret and pain. And for a moment as their eyes met… Kaoru felt something was wrong.

**:::**

She had decided to take a walk alone. Sakura was a very friendly woman, but every time they talk that only reminded her about Kaoru and the guilt she felt in her death. Iizuka was a monster that only cared for money and she started to doubt her plan of revenge. They were all hitokiris, but Kenshin… he was so nice so calm… he just didn't fit the label of a slayer. _God,_ _I am wrong? _

As she lifted her head to look up her eyes crossed with a ghost…. she was standing across the street staring back at her… as if she was alive! _Are you here to condemn me? – _she thought. Tomoe only noticedKaoru was not a ghost when saw another woman along her – the owner of the restaurant.

Her lips involuntarily curved into asmile.

As Kaoru continues her way ignoring her, Tomoe absorbs the pain that comes from the girl's eyes. And it doesn't matter how much she wanted to run after her, how deeply she wants to apologize, her feet are frozen… stuck to the ground by invisible nails… stopping her from moving.

**:::**

"He is back… Now is too late." - Iizuka rubs his forehead, Kenshin arrived two days ago and this way is going to be impossible to kill Katsura. "Also, I thought you'd already deal with that girl! But I heard she is as alive as I am. Even if I ask you simple things you're not capable of doing it!"

"Take it easy…" - Koijiro took a sip of the sake – "I'll take care of her, don't worry." – he place the sake on the table and stared at Iizuka: "But, she is not as easy as you say… she is always surrounded by people… And by people I don't mean just the neighbors or the clients…. I mean people like Shinomori Aoshi and his comrades, and sometimes even Haijime Saito…"

"Saito?" – _That may turn into a problem… I need to talk to Saotome and warn him about Saito, if he suspects that there is a spy inside of Shinsen we will have a huge problem._ "What kind of connection do they have?" – he asked but as the other shrugged his shoulders he continue: "I don't care… I want her dead by the end of the day, before she causes us even more troubles."

**:::::**

"Are you sure of what you just asked?" – Yumi says as she sees Yahiko leaving with Kaoru's letter.

"Yes." She had thought about Saito's offer for a two days… But seeing Tomoe in the morning only speeded her decision. He was the only way for her to get Tomoe's diary.

Yumi got up and started to walk away: "I will need you for another night, so you should go and rest."

"Does Haruka still sick?" – Kaoru's eyebrow lifted in concern.

"Yes… Doctors don't understand why she is like this. But they can't bring down the fever." – Yumi sighed, one day her friend was talking about how proud she was of Yahiko and they were laughing together and in the next day she was so weak that end up fainting in the kitchen.

Kaoru realized that Yahiko was quiet than usual but she thought he was just tired because of his new job. "That's why Yahiko seems so worried..."

"Yes he is. She is very weak and she throws away everything she eats… What doesn't hel her to get better."

"Maybe it's a virus." – Kaoru said, but the geisha shook her head negatively :"No… If it was that they would take her to the hospital so that she couldn't infect anyone else."

"I understand. But then… what could it be?" – Kaoru asked

"They don't know yet. But if they don't find soon… I fear the worst." – she had never seen Haruka so fragile. Her face was discolored, her eyes didn't have the same vivid color anymore, and most of the times she was delirious because of the fever.

"No…" – she thought about her own situation and how lonely she felt when her parents left: "Yahiko… she is going to fight for him. She is going to get better, you'll see." – her words were more a wish than anything else.

They stared at each other in silence for a while. They didn't knew what to say… Life and Death aren't things humans could control as they wish…

Kaoru heard footsteps approaching the entrance as she saw that it was Yahiko, and he had a letter in his hands.

"Thank you, Yahiko-chan…You must go and see your mother." – he didn't even complain when she called him chan and he immediately left without saying a word.

"Saito will come here tonight, as you asked." - Kaoru heard Yumi saying as she was still looking at Yahiko's back as he walked away.

**:::::::**

Katsura walked side by side with Kenshin. He felt that the samurai's soul was troublesome, but then, Kenshinalways seemed to mind things others didn't care… Except that for this time, he was sure he knew what it was."Whoever this person is… he is very close to us."

The red-haired man didn't turn his head to answer: "Maybe he is not close… Maybe he used Kaoru because she was close to us… or maybe she used her to be closer."

Kenshin was a hard man to read, so, he really needed to ask: "Do you trust your words? Or is it just logic?"

Kenshin glanced at Katsura with a strange look on his eyes. He wasn't expecting this kind of question coming from him. Also he was still trying to understand what he was demanding to know. Kenshin always tried to keep his logic above his feelings, that's what he does when it comes to kill. His heart tells him it is wrong, but his head says that it every death has a purpose… Ishin's purpose, a new era of equality for everyone. Now he assumed that in some way Kaoru was working against this ideal so it doesn't matter what he feels towards her… he needs to put that aside to meet their goal. _Do I? _

Facing Kenshin's silence Katsura continued: "You know… My logic says that I should trust the evidences and that shows her guilty… but this… other part of me that keeps whispering in my ear that I have not that much evidence about her involvement in this."

"Which one will you follow?" – Kenshin's answer was so rush, that Katsura's only conclusion was the samurai really wished her to be proved innocent.

"The logic one… as far as I have full evidence… which I don't." – he stared at Sakura a few feet away from him. _A sixth sense as she says…_

**:::::::::::::::**

Once again the restaurant was full at night, and once again she was "forced" to use those expensive clothes. The way men looked at her made shivers run down her spine. She felt she was the center of everyone's attention, as a prey among predators… One of them even tried to touch her hand, but she quickly went away pretending she didn't notice his advances upon her. _I am only helping Yumi… she gave a home… If I followed Kenshin's advices about not working here, I wouldn't have a place to stay by now…_But important than the reasons that led her to work, Kaoru needed to focus on what she was going to say to Saito. So she asked Yumiko to take her place for a while. She needed fresh air.

As she left, she saw Yumi walking along with a man. The way she looked at him was different… and Kaorufound it odd…

She breath heavily finally reaching the door at the back of the restaurant. The cold breeze of the night was what she needed to take away from her nose the intoxicating smell of Sake and tobacco. She wasn't sure of what she was doing, but doing nothing wasn't an option.

Kaoru looked at the stars in the sky as memories of her Misao and Sano filled her mind… She stood there for a while before a voice spook away her happy thoughts:

"Finally you came to me." – a man appeared from the bushes and slowly approached her. Kaoru ran to the door, but he reached it before her and captured her fist: "You've been hiding for so long. I won't let you go away again."

"Who are you?" – she released herself from him as he stared at her surprised. Probably wasn't expecting her to have such strength, what made him angrier: "I am the last person you're going to see… that's all you need to know."

"Why?" – she stepped a few feet back when she recognized the face of the other man who appeared behind her attacker.

He took his sword from the shield and stopped staring at her: "You're a loose end… that they want to tie." – he didn't noticed Saito was behind him: "Do you know what makes angrier than loose ends…" – he turned when Saito talked only to feel the wolf's sword slash his stomach. "Cowards."

Kaoru stares in shock as she watches the body hitting the floor.

"Who was he?" – Saito's voice seemed so far away…

"I don't know." – she answered her eyes stood focused on the dead man.

Saito noticed she was too shocked to answer, so he tried to say something to awake her: "I think I've pay my debt with you saving your life."

Kaoru glared at him. Was all for nothing? She lost her upper hand, the right to ask him to do something for her. her mind worked furiously trying hard to find something that would catch his interest: "What I thought of asking you can give you the name of this man." She looked down at her kimono, dirty with blood.

"Really?" – he didn't knew if that information could be useful … what he really wanted to know was the reason why assassins were sent to kill her. But he knew she wasn't going to tell him anyway. "What do you need?"

**::::::**

As Kenshin couldn't get Katsura words out of his mind he decided that he needed to talk to her. What he didn't expect was that In his way to Aka, he would find Saito. He had planned to ignore him, but as they pass each other Saito couldn't resist:

"We shouldn't postpone this much longer"

Kenshin stopped a few meters away: "I am in a hurry." – his hands weren't on his sword showing he had no intention to fight. _Not tonight._

Saito understood his plans and changed into a relaxed position: "Yes… you always arrive late, isn't it? And today is no exception."

Kenshin that had already started walking again stopped:"What?"

"Well…" – Saito enjoyed his time seeing the apprehension on the other man's face: "I had to save her from being attacked again, if she was waiting for you, she would be dead by now, because you always arrive too late."

"Saito…" – he ignored the scorn on his tone: "Where is Kaoru?"

"At the restaurant, safe… Because of me."

Kenshin ignored Saito and started running to the restaurant.

:::::::::::

She didn't call for Yumi, because she suspected her to be with that man… So she grabbed a bowl with water and a bandage and went to her room. Kaoru wanted desperately to clean the blood from both her face and neck that spilled from the man Saito had killed. She hated doing that and as she did it, she felt disgusted as tears run down her face. How could someone kill like that?

She tried to clean that image of her mind.

**:::::**

Kenshin took the stairs to the place he thought to be her room, he knew her ki well, so it would be easy to find her. _She is here. _The samurai stopped behind the shoji and tried to understand the reason behind his actions. Was he doing this only to find the evidence Katsura asked him to? Or was he doing this because he couldn't accept her betrayal?

**::::**

_I can't be alone in here, If I am alone, then it's easy for them to find me._– Kaoru was nervously thinking of what to do. She couldn't call Yumiko because she was alone with the geishas serving the clients, and she couldn't call Yumi neither… _I need to go downstairs and have people around me._

Decided, she quickly made her way to get out of the room.

The moment she opened the shoji their eyes met.

:::.

**So... What do you think?**

**Please review.**


	13. Chapter 13

**Hi everyone! **

**First of all I want to thank everyone who take some time to leave a comment to last chapter, and by that I mean: Kenkaofan; Ihaine 07; Taishou and Lydia the tygeropean - your reviews make me want to write more and more. Thank you so much!**

**Also those who favorited and added my story to their alert subscription - Oh My God! I am so happy to have 47 people follwing this story! I know it must be a small number for some people here who have the ability to write amazing stories, as I already had the chance to read, But for an "outsider" like me, this number makes me happy!**

**I started this chapter with a Linkin Park's song - The Final Masquerade - I heard it first time this weak and I felt that it had a good connection to the events of this story. - I hope you to enjoy the chapter. **

**Chapter 13 – Dangerous Love**

**_Final Masquerade_**

_Tearing me apart with words you wouldn't say_

_And suddenly tomorrow's moment washed away_

_Cuz I don't have a reason and you don't have the time_

_But we both keep on waiting_

_For something we won't find_

_The light on the horizon was brighter yesterday_

_With shadows floating over, the scars begin to fade_

_We said it was forever_

_But then it slipped away_

_Standing at the end of the final masquerade_

_The final masquerade_

_All I ever wanted, the secrets that you keep_

_All you've ever wanted_

_The truth I couldn't speak_

_Cuz I can't see forgiveness, and you can't see the crime_

_And we both keep on waiting for_

_What we left behind_

_::_

The first thing that caught his attention as he saw her was the blood on her clothes. As he stepped inside she took a step back and he closed the door behind them. He stared at her with worry written all over his face. Only when he turned his attention to her face he saw something he failed to notice before. There was fear on her eyes, and her hands were shaking. Was she afraid of him? "Who did that to you?"

::

When she saw him on the other side of the door, Kaoru didn't know what to feel… She was still afraid because of what happened minutes ago, and when he made his way into her room forcing her to step back she felt anger rising inside of her. She was angry that all this was happening because of him, because her love for him was slowly killing her, and he was the only one that didn't seemed to mind.

So when she heard him asking who did that to her, Kaoru knew she could take that chance to speak her mind and maybe try to clear things between them. But she couldn't. She was too nervous and angry to talk to him now. "Why do you care?"

The change on her eyes from fear to determination made him blink in admiration. "I can see you were attacked." – he pointed to the blood stains on her kimono.

"I was attacked before and you didn't care, so why would you now?" – She was trying to keep her voice down because she didn't want to disturb no one else, but it was being difficult.

_She doesn't know I was there. _He thought. _Of course no one told her._

His lack of answer only angrier her more. She sighed heavily: "Also, I thought you said we had nothing to talk about." She passed him by ready to leave the room when he grabbed her fist and they stare back at each other: "What changed from two days ago Mr. Himura?" – she asked harshly.

The use of his family name instead his first name shocked him. But he didn't let that stop him. "Are you afraid of me, Kaoru?" – he asked without taking his eyes away from hers. "Should I?" – Evasive. Kaoru was being evasive, but he could see she was hurt. The happiness he noticed two days ago when she first saw him was transformed into angry and distance. She was hurt by his actions. He could tell that. But he wanted her to talk; he wanted her to give him hope that everything was a misunderstanding… "Uh.." – she complained: "You're hurting my fist."

Kenshin released her immediately. "I am sorry." – he didn't noticed the strength he was using on her. Kaoru gently massaged the red area on her fist: "I am tired of this." – she sighed fighting the tears.

Kenshin fought with himself not to comfort her. It was painful to see her like this. But he also was in a difficult situation. "Please tell me the truth."

Kaoru glanced at him. "The truth? Do you want to know the truth?" – her hands went to her hips as she answered defiantly: "The truth is that Everyone cares except you." – she pointed her finger to him – "Aoshi saved me from the attack, Yumi came to see me when I was recovering even Katsura came to talk to me! But you…" – Kaoru was spilling out everything she held inside for the last weeks. "Where were you? Oh, I remember, you went to Otsu with Tomoe."

_Katsura came to see her?_ Kenshin had never seen her this angry. She had never talked to him like that before.

So, seems like he was the bad guy on this story. "I was sent to Otsu!" - It was all he could say in his defense, because he was too confused to say anything else. Why Katsura came to talk to her?

Kaoru sighed tired. She had said everything she wanted to him, she had destroyed his defenses, she could see he was confused, And two days ago that would be enough to make her happy because he was trying to trust her again, but Kaoru realized she too hurt to make peace with him now. Maybe…

_Maybe this will never end… Maybe we are not meant to be. _"Soon I will have evidences that prove my innocence. At least that's what I hope."

"How?" – he asked not because he was doubting her, but he knew that if that so-called evidence existed would also expose the real traitor.

_Is that concern on your voice, Kenshin? _"Don't worry. I have help."

He took a step closer: "That evidence… can get you killed."

Kaoru stepped back and her back was leaning against door: "It's the only thing they can do to me."

"Tell me how I am going to help you?" – he asked still puzzled with the changes he found on her.

"You weren't there when I needed more, so why should I ask your help when I know you won't come?" – Tears rolled down her cheeks. Kaoru couldn't hold them anymore. He was… to close and all she wanted to do was to be held in his arms... that idea sounded so comfortable now.

"Do you trust him that much? Only because Shinomori saved you once doesn't mean you should trust him your life!" – this conversation was running away from its original purpose, but he couldn't help thinking that her distance towards him was related to her intimacy with the Okashira.

"It wasn't his name that I called when Udo's sword was slashing my flesh. It wasn't Aoshi that I wanted by my side when I couldn't hold the pain of the injuries after the attack…"

Kenshin approached her and hugged her. At the begging she tried to get away from his embrace but as he tightened his arms around her she gave up and let her head rest on his chest: "It was you." – she finally said. Kenshin's fingers tangled in Kaoru's hair as he allowed himself to inhale that sweet scent of jasmine that only she had. "I would give everything to get back in time and change that…" – he spoke.

_What I am going to do with you? You refuse to help me and refuse to accept my help..._

After a while Kaoru broke the embrace and Kenshin knew by the look on her eyes she was putting an end to their conversation: "I hope to have your evidences soon. Until then, please, don't look for me." – she slide the door to open.

"Why?" – it was all he could say before a girl appeared with a huge bouquet on her hands.

She seemed surprised to see Kaoru: "Where have you been? I've been looking for you all around the place! It as mess downstairs."

Kaoru nod: "I am sorry Yumiko... I just had a small problem."

_Why is Kaoru working at night? _Kenshin wondered as he gave a suspicious look at the red flowers on the girl's hands.

"God! What happened to your clothes? Are you ok?" – The girl asked as she noticed Kaoru's kimono.

"I am ok Yumiko. Please don't worry." - Kaoru couldn't help but look at the bouquet in her hands it was enormous. "Are those for Yumi?"

Kenshin didn't knew why he was still there but his curiosity stopped him from leaving and the girl's answer totally blown him away. "No actually a guest sent those for you." - she said giving them to Kaoru.

Kaoru widened her eyes in shock: "For… me?"

::::

Saito was a wolf, he was sure that if this didn't end up soon, his neck would be the next one on the table.

Saotome used to be one of the Shinsen members but as years passed by, he lost his faith on their purpose.

_Defeating the evil ones – _It was one of the ideals of Shinsen. He thought as he saw Iizuka approaching.

As the other man seated Saotome started:" I now understand that there is no such thing as good or evil… We are domed in here, so I am decided to get as much as I can from this life, because death is sure for us all. But I also understand, that if we don't close this matter quickly, It will come for me sooner than what I thought."

"Are you saying that Kojiro failed?"

"Saito killed him before he got to her." - he answered

Iizuka punched the table: "Stupid woman, she just refuses to die!"

Saotome ignored his action: "They want to attack Katsura tomorrow night."

"At the meeting?"

"Yes."

"It might be a good idea. He will be only with a few men…" – Iizuka knew Katsura and Okubo called only the closest friends to their meeting. He wanted to reassure them that they would carry with their purpose even without Saigo.

"What about the girl?"

"I will have to make a move Saotome… she will literally burn in hell."

**::::**

As Tomoe saw Iizuka leaving, she knew he was meeting someone to continue with the plot. She didn't knew what to do and end up following him and hearing part of their conversation. "Saotome…"

They were plotting against Kaoru again… If something happened to her with her knowledge she would have to add guilty to her regret. She couldn't live with that.

**::::**

He couldn't hold the commotion on his chest, so he walked and walked to the longest way to Katsura's house. He needed to think. Think about her attitude, about her words, and about… that gift. What was that suppose to mean?

When he saw the flowers were to her, he felt… jealous.

_You have to admit it. _ He left right after the other girl gave them to Kaoru. _I can't say if she is speaking the truth, because I can't trust myself in what concerns to Kaoru. _He felt turmoil inside his chest. _I am too implicated… I want too much to believe her to be able to distinguish right from wrong. _

As he arrived Katsura's house he had already made up his mind. "She said you went to talk to her." – he went straight to the point.

"Yes I did." – Katsura was calm as ever. – "Sakura persuade me to go. "

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"I wanted you to go and talk to her without being influenced by my opinion." – he smiled – " Now, that you've talked to her what do you think?"

"She said she was going to prove her innocence." – _And then she started crying and I couldn't stop myself from hugging her. And it has been the best moment of my life in a month._

"And what do you think?" – Katsura stared straight at him. "Maybe I am too close to the matter to be an impartial judge." – he said surprising Katsura. – "Just allow me to lay an eye on her."

"There's no need, I already have a man doing that." – Katsura answered quickly, ignoring the surprised look on Kenshin's face.

_If you sent someone to look for her, it's because you want her to be safe, and that means, that you think she is innocent. _Clearly that man failed last night. "Who is he?"- Kenshin demanded to know.

"Makoto Shishio."

**::::::::::::::::::::**

_Tokyo, 23 October 1869_

_Things are getting worst._

_Today I was attacked again. And It doesn't matter how many times I wash my face and hands, they're still with that strange smell… of blood. It's agonizing to know people are dying because of me, even if they are trying to kill me._

_ I am almost sure Iizuka has something to do with this. But, I have no proof._

_In the last-minute Saito appeared and saved me. Apparently I lost the only leverage I had on him. But, he agreed to give me Tomoe's diary._

_Oh my God! Kenshin appeared here in the end of the night. _

_When I first saw him I froze. But then, something took over me… I think I was keeping too many things on the inside and I end up shouting everything to him…_

_He acted different from two days ago. He seemed willingly to hear what I had to say._

_Gosh… When he hugged me I felt so…so… protected….Anyway I stood strong and I asked him to keep his distance from me until I find the evidences I need._

_Then, in the end Yumiko appeared with a bouquet of flowers and surprised me saying it was a gift to me. Kenshin left immediately. I am afraid he stood with the wrong idea._

_I guess I have everything against me…._

_Kamyia Kaoru_

**_::::: _**

Kenshin asked Saigoro about Shishio and as soon as he found him he said: "You're supposed to be looking for Miss Kamyia aren't you?"

The other samurai just nod. He felt the famous Battousai was angry about something, but he didn't really mind. They were meant to fight each other anyway, if Battousai wanted to be now, he didn't mind.

"Then, how come she was attacked last night while she was working and you know nothing of it?" – Kenshin asked staring straight at Shishio.

Shishio lifted his eyebrow: "It's impossible, she doesn't work at night."

"Apparently she does."

"Only if she became a geisha." – His answer made Kenshin even angrier. His feeling of possession around her made the red-haired man feel like someone was punching him on the stomach mentioning that _his_ Kaoru could be object of want around other man. "Because you failed to do your job she end up being saved by Haijime Saito!"

Shishio wanted to laugh. Grown up men always act like children when women mess up their minds. "That's good. If she is alive, that's good. You should be glad."

Kenshin stared at him in disbelief: "I am saying that she could be dead because you failed to do your job!" – he pointed his finger blaming him. _What kind of man was this?_

"The weak die and the strong survive." – he glanced at Kenshin and grinned: "A good man is never far from his woman." – Then he pointed to Kenshin defiantly:

"She is your woman, don't blame me for your mistakes,Battousai."

**:::::**

**Ohh... I just love Shishio.. I know he is the bad-guy but he is so cool... The last two senteces are originally his. He always knows what to say, doesn't he?**

**Anyway, Did you like the chapter?**

**Tell me what do you think! I am looking forward to read your opinions. **

**Kisses.**

**Jou-chan**


	14. Chapter 14

**Hi!**

**First of all thanks to all of you who review: lhaine07; kenkaofan; Lydia the tygeropean; kyoandyuya and Tanya. T**

**Thanks for your compliments and for sharing your opinions. I love to read it... And you encouraged and comfort me a lot.**

**Yes I agree... Shishio is the best. Eh!Eh!  
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**In what concerns to the flowers... It was a client who sent the flowers the one I said that tried to grab Kaoru's hand when she was serving the drinks... I think it was in Chapter 12... Do you remember? **

**This chapter is soft... Maybe because the next one will be a little to explosive...**

**But I hope you to enjoy it anyway.**

**Chapter 14 – A Day before hell**

Kaoru couldn't stand to look at those flowers on her room. She didn't cared which client gave them, so she took them to Yumi's: "It's not as you're betraying someone by keeping them, you know?"

Kaoru smiled. Yumi knew her well.

"You're still too attached to let go." – Yumi concluded – "That's ok, I can keep them."

Kaoru give her the flowers happily: "Thank you."

Yumi put them on top of the table and stared at them for a while: "In exchange you'll chose something from my 'portfolio'." – she said with a funny expression.

"What do you mean?" – Kaoru asked as she saw the other woman taking a black velvet chest from the drawer. "Well, this is a trade. You give me something and I give you something in return." – she opened the chest and Kaoru's eyes widened at the jewels on the inside:

"Whoah…" – she looked at Yumi – "This were all gifts?" – Yumi nod.

All jewels were so feminine and shinny… But something caught Kaoru's attention:

"Who gave you this?" – she pointed to a military plate that seemed to contrast with all the jewels.

"An American." – Yumi answered - "He didn't gave me… he end up forgetting it here. I just didn't throw that thing away because it's made of silver and if I want to dissolve it can give me some cash." – she shrugged her shoulders and Kaoru smiled: "I want this one."

The look of disbelief on Yumi's face only made Kaoru laugh: "Are you sure? From all the jewels here you choose the ugliest of them all?" – she pointed to Kaoru: "You're certainly not going to wear that, do you?"

"No. I have a plan for it." – Yumi shrugged her shoulders again and sighed: "Ok, so be it."

::::::::::::::::

As Kaoru left her alone Yumi looks at the red empty bottle beside her futon and remembers the last night events:

::::

He appeared on the room but she didn't saw him immediately. She was alone with Yumiko serving the clients.

_Where did Kaoru go?_

He sat in front of her on the other side of the counter: "I want a drink."

She immediately recognized his voice and looked up.

He grinned as she said: "There's been a long time since the last time."

"Too long." – he replied. "I think we have a special "vintage" waiting for us on your room."

And before she could know Yumi was driven by him to the upper rooms.

::

They drank that expansive sake he gave her the last time.

His voice was rough but it seemed to calmed her as she remembers of laying her head on his chest while hearing him speaking about Japan and its weakness. "If I was the one to rule…"

"So do you like power?" – she said contemplating the flame that appeared on his eyes.

"I love it." – he answered - "And someday I will rule this country and make it strong, like it always should have been." – then he turned his attention to her: "And you will be by my side."

She snorted and got up: "You're just saying that now, but in the end, if you became that powerful man you'll no longer care for me or this place." – she said turning his back on him.

She was tired, tired of those promises. A lot of men promised her things and failed to their word.

So why would she trust him?

Then, she felt his hands on her arms and in a second she was facing his intensive glare: "A man is only powerful as his promises are. And I am promising you this, woman: You'll be by my side when I conquer this country."

She gasped as he kissed her. As if it was the first time she was kissed.

:::

Kaoru was on the outside talking to Yahiko. Trying to cheer him up. He is really down as his mother doesn't become better. She was having some trouble breathing and he was getting pretty worried.

But in the meanwhile he was called to do an errand and their conversation end up sooner:

"I Have to go Kaoru." – his brown eyes looked back at the girl he was starting to know.

"Ok." – she smiled.

He started walking away but then he stopped and looked back at her: "Thank you for the care."

"You're welcome." – She replied as he turned to leave.

Kaoru stood there for a while thinking about how she and her father used to spend the evenings talking… But she got up to leave before nostalgic could take over her.

As she comes into her room, Kaoru finds a package on her futon.

Along with the package there was also a letter, her fingers opened the envelope:

_Enjoy the reading._

_I could read it myself but I really don't want to get inside of a woman's head._

_I hope that in the end you can give me the names I want._

_Saito_

Kaoru hands trembled.

_T__his is Tome's diary_.

This… diary is her last chance.

She sits and starts reading it from back to front... Last events could be the most important ones.

As she started to read... her eyes widened in shock.

:::::

Kenshin was at his house… resting.

There will be a long meeting at night and he knows it's going to be boring.

But he has to be there. He is forced to be there, and yet, his mind is elsewhere.

Shishio's words still ranging inside his mind: _A good man is never far from his woman…_

Although there were no civil boundaries between them, Kenshin felt she was connected to him… his woman… But then, he failed to protect her because he was not near her when she needed the most… he put himself away from her.

How could a lunatic like Shishio knew something he didn't?

He could not go to town and talk to her, he would have to leave to Katsura's place soon… But he wanted to talk to her, he needed to talk to her…

It was when Something took him away from his thoughts.

Someone was approaching his house quickly. At the beginning his hands flew to his sword but then he noticed he knew the person's ki.

She stopped in front of the gate and Kenshin could sense the anxiety and apprehension that person carried.

He got up and walked in her direction just to allow his eyes to see what his mind had imagined.

Kaoru.

Kenshin noticed she was arching and was still trying to catch her breath. Like she had runt all the way there.

Kenshin approaches the small gate and opens it without taking his eye away from her.

Kaoru, placed her hand on her chest. Her heart is pounding so fast… she didn't remember to run like this… never in her life. She tries to talk but no voice came out.

"Please come in." – he said softly but she hesitates an image on her mind:

**:**

_ "I am going to prove my innocence to you." –_Kaoru remembered her words the last time she was on this house._ : "And in that day Kenshin, you will come to me and ask me for forgiveness…And I will not forgive you."_

_:_

"There's been a long time since the last time you've been here. " – he says aware of her hesitation.

Kaoru shook the thoughts off her mind and goes straight to the point: "You're having a meeting tonight, don't you?"

Kenshin stares at her in disbelief. "How do you know?"

"That doesn't matter. I am here to tell you to be careful."

Kenshin made a suspicious look: "You're hiding something."

"You're going to be attacked." – she prompted.

His eyebrow knitted together: "How do you know?" For much urgency her words carried he couldn't stop himself from ignoring their message. He was focused on her.

"Are you not listening to me? Now it's not time for you to wonder about my sources but to do something about the information I am giving, maybe change the place of the meeting, reinforce the security…" – her hands moved frantically: " I don't know! Do something!"

"Your sources can be lying to you, they may use you to deceive me." – He took a step close to her.

His heart was ignoring her message and focusing on her instead.

Minutes ago he was asking for a chance to be with her and she appeared there! He needed to take that chance.

"My source is secure." – she replied.

"How can you be so sure? You can't rely that much on people."

"Yes, I do know that." – The way she answered made him feel guilty, as she was including him in the group of people who she doesn't trust.

He sighed and his hands invited her: "Please, come in. Let's talk without being interrupted." Kenshin remembered himself that the last time they met a bouquet interrupted them.

She shook her head and took two steps back: "I have to go back to work."

He took a step forward: "I thought you're working at night."

_She is running away from me._

"I work during the day, but a friend got sick and I am doing double-shifts, so I have to go.." - her voice failed as she noticed he wasn't giving up easily.

"Let me walk you to the restaurant then." – he hoped that they could talk along the way, but her reaction proved him wrong.

"No." – Kaoru's answer was immediate. "I want to go alone."

That said she turned her back on him and started walking away.

:::::

_Something changed in him. _

_I've noticed that in the last time we met but I thought he was acting differently because he felt I was still nervous because of the attack…. But, now… He invited me to come in… and talk. _– Kaoru wasn't paying attention to the road, she was lost in her thoughts about Kenshin.

She was still angry with him…

No, not angry… Hurt…

But Kaoru doubted that someday she would be capable of fulfilling her promise of never forgiving him.

Suddenly she felt someone standing on her away and gasped at the sight of the person in front her.

"I need to talk to you." – Kaoru stared at her in disbelief. Tomoe was the last person she was expecting to see. "We have nothing to talk about." – Kaoru replied walking away, but Tomoe grabbed the sleeve of her kimono. "Please Kaoru san, you don't know how miserable my life has been since I came here.

"Your life is miserable? Your life? And what about my life?" – she exploded. But noticing the sadness on her eyes Kaoru immediately regretted of the way she spoke.

_The weight of your burden is written all over your face... But what is your burden Tomoe? _

"Please I don't want to talk to you, not now." – she end up saying. There were too many things at the same time.

The other woman nod respectfully and replied: "Then, I will search for you in a proper moment. Maybe Tomorrow morning?" – she asked.

Kaoru sighed. She couldn't face Tomoe for many reasons. One of them was the diary she kept on her room. "Ok."

:::::

As he saw Katsura talking, his mind flew to Kaoru and how she seemed to avoid stepping inside his house. The house that once has been hers too. She was so nervous, so fragile, and all he wanted to do was to make her come in and talk. Maybe he could ease the things between them… maybe he could ask her for forgiveness… even if he wasn't sure of anything…

As the thoughts about her filled his mind the meeting ended up faster than what he thought.

As It ended and everything seemed quiet Kenshin concluded Kaoru sources were lying to her. And if they were lying to her then she was in danger.

The next thing he would do was to go to the restaurant and use any necessary means to convince her to come to his house so that he could lay an eye on her.

But the quietness disappeared as he heard screams from the guards on the outside.

As Saigoro opens the door a claw comes from the roof and smashes a man's head in a blink of the eye, then a bunch of men with katanas appeared out of nowhere. They dressed in black and their faces were covered with masks...

They were under attack.

_Just Like she said._

Kenshin tried to shield Katsura and knock as many guys as he could. Bringing Shishio was a good idea, because he also was a good fighter, unless his manners, of course…

"_We have to stop the guy on the roof._" – Kenshin thought... But if he left Katsura's side he was sure they would targeted him.

Apparently Shishio read Kenshin's thoughts because as soon as he got up to the roof Kenshin saw a claw hitting the ground and a man without an arm in 's sword finished him off.

That almost put an end to the fight.

::::

Kenshin sighed. Many were injured and some of them allucinating.

_Poisoned Kunais. – _Kenshin thought. It would be a long night.

_Kaoru… who are you dealing with?_

"It was a good thing you reinforced the security today Kenshin." – Katsura said placing a hand on Kenshin's shoulders before he left to help Okubo.

:::::::::::::

**So, Kaoru is avoiding Kenshin as much as she can. And he wants to be with as much as he can... **

**The next chapter it's going to bring a turmoil on the story...**

**In what concerns to the military plate I speak, the one Yumi gave to Kaoru, I didn't knew how do you call that, but I put the image of the object I meant as the image of this story...**

**Please review.**

**Kisses **

**Jou chan**


	15. Chapter 15

**Hi everyone!**

**I am sorry for the delay... **

**Thanks to everyone who reviewed and favourited my story. It is reaching the end... **

**Hope you to like this chapter.**

**::::**

**Chapter 15 – Flames of Hell**

_Ancient wisdom says that when we are about to die, moments of our lives flash in front of our eyes. Just like a movie._

_As for me, there were no images…. Just his voice… screaming my name. And I didn't mind how desperate his tone seemed to be… I was just thankful that of all the people in the world It was his voice I heard before I died. I was even allowed to feel his fingers touching my face as the smell of his skin swaddledaround me. _

_I smiled and thanked God over and over for letting me keep his memory._

_There was an incomplete happiness growing inside my chest. I was glad because he would be my last reminiscence and sad because I knew he was nothing more than a delusion… a Fantasy of a dying human._

_"Arigato…" – I remember saying over and over until everything went black._

:::::::::::::

**BY THE END OF THE DAY**

When that day started she never thought it would end that way…

First she heard screams, but she didn't mind. Maybe a few months ago she would have run to see if she could help, but Kaoru learnt that this was a dangerous country, and, screams were a part of the ambient sound… So she continued writing in that small book Aoshi gave her weeks ago.

After her conversation with Tomoe she felt no more nerve to go ahead with her plan. That woman was as desperate as she was, maybe more. Her heart was not black as she first thought; it was just wounded, as hers.

As she heard people running to the outside Kaoru stopped writing and got up.

_What in the world is happening here?_

It was only when wreckage fell from the rooms above hers and covered her way out that she realized how trapped she was.

Kaoru picked up her notebook and run to the other corner of the room as she saw flames starting to burnt between the wreckage. _This place Is on fire!_

She thought furiously of ways to save herself, but her only way out was blocked, and any other would kill her. As the smoke reached her nose, and the flames approached her, she fell to the ground almost unconsciousness.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

**At the Beginning of the day**

Kaoru rolled herself on the futon. She tossed and turned all night unable to sleep. Tomoe's diary gave her nightmares. Her words filled of pain and regret echoed in her head as if Tomoe herself was reading them for her.

She sighed deeply. _I cannot do this._

"Kaoru?" – she heard Yumiko's voice on the other side of the paper door. "Kaoru, are you awake? There is a woman downstairs; she says she needs to talk to you."

::::::::::::::::::::::::

Kenshin rested his head against the wood of the wall. After the attack he and the other samurai were "forced" to stay in Katsura's house. Last night showed their vulnerabilities were bigger than what they ever thought. _We need to protect the remaining heads of Ishin – _he remembered Iizuka's words – _Or all of our efforts were in vain._

Iizuka had a point… But then, why did Kenshin felt so unsteady?

He promised himself that the first thing he would do after being released of his duty was to find her and do everything in his grasp to bring her back… She was in danger… he was sure.

_Just… wait for me… Please._

::::::::::::::::

Kaoru walked downstairs and from far made a signal to the woman to follow her.

What she was doing was brave and Kaoru didn't want her to risk her life for her. If someone saw them together, Tomoe would be a dead woman for sure.

As they reached her room Kaoru opened the door for her to enter.

It was then when Tomoe did the unexpected. She kneeled on the ground and bowed her head: "I am so sorry Kamyia-san. My misjudgment almost get you killed."

Kaoru, still in shock with her action, kneeled down and forced her to look at her. She didn't need to ask what she meant, because she had read the plans and schemes Iizuka had forced her to do. "No." – and even if she was a part of his plan to destroy her relationship with Kenshin, it was never her fault the things that happened before. "They used you. "

"No… I've searched for them, because my fiancé was murdered. And I thought that revenge would soothe my conscience..." – Tomoe replied.

"I know." –Kaoru said.

Tomoe stare at her in awe. How could she know?

"Someone gave this to me." – Kaoru opened one of the wardrobe doors and show her the diary Saito gave her. Tomoe eyes widened recognizing the object. Kaoru walked at her: "I wanted to tell him the truth. And Show him that I wasn't the person behind of this plot… your diary would prove my innocence."

Tomoe opened her mouth to speak but Kaoru's next move took the words out of her mouth. She just hand the diary back to her: "But then, I realized that sometimes pain lead us to make wrong choices. The kind of choices that can get you killed." – she mentioned her to pick the object from her hand and so Tomoe did. "Sometimes love can get you killed." – she end up saying.

Tomoe stood quiet for a while but then realization hit her: "Iizuka wants to kill you." – she said.

"I was almost sure of that… I will ask a friend for protection. Don't worry." – Kaoru was planning to ask Aoshi's help. "Now go. If he knows you're here he will kill you."

Reluctantly Tomoe made her way to the door, but before leaving she turned back at her: "I will tell himKaoru… he is a good man he will understand...he will come for you…I will tell him the truth myself."

:::::::::::::::::::

It was almost noon and he waited patiently. Saito knew she wasn't alone and he saw the moment Tomoeleft Kaoru's room. He slid the door open and found Kaoru staring blankly at the ceiling: "If you're friends than you should have ask her about the diary instead of asking me to steal it."

Kaoru didn't noticed him entering but didn't mind either. "I have some names for you."

She was acting strange. Distant, as if she didn't care for nothing anymore. The flame that used to burn in her eye was gone. "Go ahead."

"Iizuka from the Inshin; a man named Kojiro, Tendo, Heinshin and Another one named Saotome." – She said the names mechanically. She had memorized all the names Tomoe wrote about.

The last name brought a smile to his face: "Thank you for your information." He turned his back and was ready to leave when Kaoru asked him:

"Does any of these names have a meaning for you?"

He stopped and answered without looking back: "You have no idea, Tanuki, you have no idea."

Aku Soku Zan "Swift dead to evil" – Now, he had some cleaning to make.

**:::::::::::::::::::**

"Seems like you have a leak of information. " – Tendo said to Iizuka as he saw Tomoe leaving the restaurant.

_That wench! She is not useful after all. _"It will leak no more."

**::::::::::::::::::**

After discussing with Tomoe, Kaoru just couldn't stop thinking about her father and a conversation they had years ago. She didn't knew why, but… that day, his words couldn't get out of her head.

All memories about her family, even if they were happy, used to bring her to a melancholy state, so after dinner she decided to go downstairs and see some familiar, maybe find someone to talk for a while.

She saw Yahiko passing by: "I heard you mother is better."

His face showed how relieved he was: "Yes, she is ok now. Thanks for taking her place while she was sick."

"You're welcome."

But as he stared at her and sighed she knew he wanted to tell her something: "Listen Kaoru, you should becareful."

"Why?"

"That man, the Mibu Wolf…" he approached her and lowered his voice.

"Saito?" – she asked

"Yes. Today I was called to deliver a message to one of his friends, and when I get to the place I saw something: I saw him killing one of his men. I think it was a revenge." – he stopped talking at looked seriously at her: "Be careful around him."

_Now I see… One of the names I gave him… It was one of his men._

"Ah… I almost forgot. This is for you." – Yahiko handed her a letter.

Kaoru smiled at the name on ir. It was from Aoshi. "Thank you Yahiko."

"Just doing my job." – he said - "Just don't forget What I told you." – he said before leaving.

_::::_

As he left and she made sure she was alone, Kaoru opened the letter:

_I will have to leave for a couple of weeks to solve some situations._

_Take care of yourself. You're surrounded by influential but also dangerous people._

_I don't believe that a lamb can survive among the beasts… unless the Wolfe acts against its nature and falls in love with the lamb's innocence. _

_ But that's another story. Stay low… at least when I am not around._

_Aoshi_

:

Kaoru sighed. But she didn't have much time to think about the implications of his absence because she heard a noise. _Someone is here. _Running to the outside she sees A Shadow. It was a small person and his hair looked just like Yahiko's: ""Yahiko, I thought you were already gone."" – But as the boy come out of the shadow Kaoru realized it wasn't him.

His hair was black, his face was dirty as his clothes but it was his eyes that got Kaoru's attention. That vivid green… "Are you hungry?" – It was the first thing that came to her mind. That boy really seemed to be mistreated.

Instead of answering walked fast at her and stretch his hand: "This is for you." – Another letter

"Who gave you this?" – She asked

"A man sent by another man." – He was instructed to say the minimal.

She opened it and her eyes scrutinized the message on it:

_Discretion is a well appreciated virtue in a woman._

_Stop nosing around…_

_Keep your mouth shut. Or we will shut it for you._

He was waiting for her reaction. It was supposed to tell them what she said, and it didn't took much longer:

"Tell to whoever gave you this that I will not bow to their will."

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

"I don't know. Maybe we should keep things low for a while." – Okubo said

"No. They think we are fragile. We must show them the contrary!" – Katsura replied.

Kenshin was listening to their conversation for a while when the town bell started ringing.

Kenshin counted the times, one, two, three… It didn't stop. They all left to the outside and see the fire from far.

As he figured out the place he started running.

:::::::::::::::::::::::

Tomoe wakes up in the middle of nowhere. Her head aching.

"Oh No!" – she remembered she was heading to Katsura's place to see Kenshin when Iizuka appeared. After that everything went black.

Even if her body was screaming for her to stop moving, she stood up and walked as fast as she could.

_I have to make it._

:::::::::::::::::

Shishio's voice woke her up. She was safe on the outside. _I remember people running and screaming… because of the fire… _ "Oh my God my restaurant!" – her hands flew to her chest as she pictured the scenario in front of her.

The place she worked for more than ten years was engulfed in flames. "No one knows how it started." – She heard Shishio tell her. She sighed and looked around. "Is everybody ok?" – she asked Yahiko and Haruka. The boy mimic her move: "Wait, where is Kaoru?" – Yahiko asks

Yumi tries to run to the inside but Shishio pulls her back: "What are you doing? I almost didn't get you in time." – he reprimanded her

"But It's Kaoru!"

"Forget about her. If she is on the inside she is already dead."

"Yumi." – she felt a hand grabbing her arm and making her turn just to see the face of a desperate man. She winced in pain and shook her head as tears fell down knowing what he was about to ask.

The red-haired man tried to ignore the meaning of her expressions: "Where is Kaoru? Tell me!"

As Yumi eyes turned to the burning restaurant as an answer Kenshin shook his head: "No. She can't die." –

No one stopped him as he run to the inside of the building in flames.

_No Kaoru, You can't die…_

:::::::::::::::::::

** So, what do you think?**

**I hope to hear it from you! Thank you everyone. Reviews are always welcome!**


	16. Chapter 16

**Anime queen and g14c1nta thank you for your reviews in Chapter 15.**

**I am sorry for this delay. But after I came from holidays, my work at the office was accumulated and It took me a while to settle everything. **

**Also, I was writing this chapter for so long that I didn't believe when I finished it today... Wow... I wanted so much to write but sometimes words are not good enough to describe my thoughts... and the scene ends up being describe differently from what I imagine at the beginning. **

**Well, Hope you like it anyway.**

**Chapter 16 - Till Death Do Us Part**

"Hi!" – Kaoru jumped startled. She had just arrived from school as someone from behind her greeted her enthusiastically. She turned to see a skinny little girl, with an angelic smile, wide green eyes and with her hair in a braid. Kaoru took a while to understand from where she appeared. "I am Misao, and I just moved in to this neighborhood… In that house over there, do you see?" – she pointed to the house in front of Kaoru's. "Well, I really don't know anyone, and as I saw you I thought that… maybe we could be friends…"

Kaoru was surprised because she never noticed that someone new was moving to the neighborhood and that girl was probably her age. She should have noticed.

Kaoru's lack of answer made Misao's smile fade away: "Never mind, I guess you already had your own friends. See you around…" – she turned to leave.

"No! wait!" – Kaoru grabbed her arm, and the girl turned again with a glint of hope in her eyes: "I really want you to be my friend, since I don't have none."

"Really?" - Misao smiled returned to her lips and Kaoru smiled back: "Yes. By the way my name is Kaoru."

"So Kaoru, are going to be friends like, like… that kind of friends that share their secrets? That know everything about each other? " – Misao was super energetic and her energy made Kaoru feel enthusiastic too.

"Yes. You will be my best friend." – Kaoru opened the front door of her house - "Do you want to come in?"

Misao stepped in and continued talking: "If you ever feel sad or lonely, or mad, or happy… " – she circled the couch and stared at Kaoru: "Or even if you fall in love, you are going to tell me, aren't you?"

"Yes." – It was the first time she saw that girl, but Kaoru felt comfortable around her, as if they knew each other for years. "As long as you do the same with me."

"Yuppiii! Best Friends Forever!"

**:::::**

It was an extremely hot day and Kaoru and Misao decided to gather the money that left from lunch and went to buy a vanilla and chocolate ice cream. As they were on their way home, a bunch of boys they already knew from school stopped in front of them. One of them demanded:

"Give me that!" – he pointed to the ice cream on Kaoru's hands.

"Why in the world should I give you this? It's ours!" – Kaoru answered.

"I was trying to be nice, but if you insist …"

"Nice?" – Misao shouted: "I never heard the word "please" coming out of your mouth!"

"Shut up stupid girl, or I will cut those stupid braids of your head!" – he said with a mischievous grin on his face.

Both girls stepped back in fear. They were bigger and more than them. Kaoru and Misao felt trapped.

"But we can arrange a deal." – he looked at his friends and they grinned as well as if they already knew what he was about to say: "If your friend decide to give me a kiss." – he pointed to Kaoru: "On the mouth of course… I let you keep your ice cream."

"What?" – Kaoru didn't wait to reply: "I would never kiss you!"

His friends laugh at her response and that made him even more angry: "And Why not?" - he was about to grab Kaoru's arm by force when someone said:

"Because you're a stupid coward and ugly dumbass…" – Everyone turned their attention to the boy who was walking into their direction – "You are so gross that even that story about the princess and the frog… that would never work on you… your big sac of shit!"

Kaoru and Misao watched in wonder as their savior placed himself between them and the other boys. They were probably the same age, but this boy was taller than the others.

"It's Sagara from 4th A. I heard he lives on the blocks of the South East…" – Misao heard one of the boys murmuring.

"I am not going to stand against him!" – one of them said leaving the group and walking in the opposite direction. "Neither do I." – Another one said copying the first one.

One by one they went away and the only one that was left was the one that Threaten the girls in the first place. "Are you going to leave me alone?" – his voice made an arc and all the bravery fade away.

"Yeah! It was you that had the idea of stealing the ice cream from them anyway!" – one of them shouted back.

Sano grinned: "What a shame, I thought this was going to be fun." – he turned his attention to the boy in front of him and whispered: "If I was you I would follow your friends… You don't want me to humiliate you more with the girls watching, don't you?"

He frowned and nod. "WAIT FOR MEEE!" – He started running away.

Sano laughed amazed. His reputation preceded him after all.

"Wow. You so brave!" – Misao told him still in shock with the change of the events.

"Thank you for helping us." – Kaoru said with a genuine smile.

He rubbed his head and grinned: "You know… In compensation … Could we share the ice cream?"

**::**

A tear escaped from her yet closed eyes as she remembered the moment they met. She had lost track of time in Japan… But missed them, both Misao and Sano.

_I've to carry on… _she wipe the tears away and opened her eyes. _Where am I?_

She looked around. _This is not my room at Aka… _Realization hit her. _The fire! _ Kaoru got up nervously. Questions filling her mind: What happened? How did the fire started? Was everyone ok? Where was she?, but before she could find any of those answers she felt someone placing a hand on her shoulder.

Kaoru turned and her eyes met his. His name flew out of her mouth: "Kenshin."

He gently made her sit again, and only then Kaoru noticed this was his room. The room in which she slept before. How could she failed to notice that in first place?

_No Kaoru, You can't die!_

One thing was clear: Kenshin saved her**: **"I thought It was a dream."She said more to herself.

"Hardly." – he picked her arm and pointed to a burnt he had handled while she was sleeping: "You almost died." – concern written all over his face.

"Thank you." – she said staring at the bruise._How come I didn't wake up even when he was treating this wound?_

"Wait here. I was making tea before you wake up…" – he left only to be back seconds later with a cup in his hands. "Thank you." – Kaoru watched as he place it in front of her.

Kenshin seemed to be fighting against himself. He wanted to say something, but he wasn't sure if this was the opportune moment.

_"Arigato…" – her eyes were closed and there was a smile on her lips. "Kenshin…" _Those wereher unconscious words from hours ago, when he saved her from that burning hell. He never wanted to see her like that again: Vulnerable, Unable to fight, surrendering herself to death. So he decided to talk: **"**While I was carrying you here this fell from your clothes."** – **Kenshin took the paper out of his hakama and showed it to her. She frowned as she recognized it immediately. He didn't wanted to push too hard on her, but all he could think was that Kaoru had probably denied to "fulfill" their "request", and so, they set the restaurant on fire just to prove they weren't kidding. _They went too far… _ **"**Tell me Kaoru." – he was calm… and there was something in his voice that showed her he wanted nothing but to keep her save, to help her.

"You will not believe if I tell you." – Kaoru shook her head thinking of what to say. Should she tell that everything started with Tomoe?

He placed his hand on hers."Please." – he was almost begging her to tell.

She was reluctant, for the first time. She was fighting as if she wanted to tell him, but there was something stopping her from spilling it out. "It's not my story to tell Kenshin. I am sorry."

He closed his eyes and sighed: "But it is your life that is at stake."

"I am sorry, If you don't know by now then… can't tell you… I am sorry." – _That means Tomoe didn't told you… I am sorry Kenshin, I am sorry._

He came for her, even if he doubted her, he came to save her. And Kaoru knew what that meant. That's why she felt horrible in hiding him the truth.

"Are you afraid of something? You're obviously under treat." – he waved the paper in front of her – "Please Kaoru trust me." – facing her lack of answer he changed his tone a bit. Maybe she wasn't aware of the seriousness of the situation: "Do you have any idea of what I felt when I saw that restaurant on flames and realized that you were on the inside?"

Kaoru gasped and looked down. Kenshin voice cracked showing that the mere memory of that disturbed him. "I thought you were dead when I saw you laying on the ground." – the blurred images of her on the floor holding that book so close to her chest filled his mind and his heart flinched – "I only realized you were alive when you started mumbling."** – **_My name_. He thought. Even in that situation she was lovely.

And if she was mumbling his name… that meant she trusted him to save her… maybe… maybe… there was hope for them after all.

_I am going to save you. You can't die Kaoru, You can't die. _– that was his determination during all the time since the moment he made his way into the burning restaurant and left with her on his arms.

The smile on her face as she heard his voice was a gift she never knew she gave him. Even in her delusional state she smiled at the sound of his voice. He knew she loved him. But then, why did she refused to tell him the truth?

Exhausted because of the last night events and glad that she was alive and with him, he end up conforming with her decision. "Very well. I will wait until you decide to tell me."

She sighed in relief and her lips curved into a shy smile... She promised Tomoe she would allow her to explain. "Thank you Kenshin. I know it must be difficult for you."

"Can you walk?" – his questioned out of the blue.

She nod unsure of where he wanted to go.

"I will take you to Katsura's." – he

"No." – Kaoru replied immediately. Iizuka was there, and everyone looked at him as a reliable man. Only Tomoe and her knew about his treachery.

Fear, anxiety… Kenshin could read all those emotions on her eyes: "You don't have to be afraid. Katsura already showed his trust on you. Didn't he?"

She shook her head nervously. But Kenshin got a felling that Katsura wasn't the problem. _Who is Kaoru? _

She stressed the moment he mentioned taking her to Katsura's house.

Kenshin helped her to stand and stared at her for a while. "I will stay there all the time ok?" – he assured her with a smile: "You will never be left alone again." It was in that moment that she threw herself in his arms gratefully. Kenshin hugged her and allowed his body to feel the warmth of hers.

Too warm. Maybe too much.

He placed his lips on her forehead and his eyes widened as he realized what was happening: "Fever…"

_I was a fool to take you here, I should have taken her to a doctor but I couldn't trust anyone to take care of her… _Kenshin picked her up and started walking.

She protested: "Put me down Kenshin. I can walk."

He stopped and glanced at her cuddling in his arms: "For once, please, stop being so stubborn."

She humped but gave up as she felt the weight on her head.

Maybe She needed to be carried and Kenshin realized that first than her.

_He really is a perceptive man. _and with that thought in mind she allowed herself to be carried away by the red-haired samurai.

**::::::::::::::::::::::::**

Sakura rested her hand on the other woman's forehead.

As Tomoe arrived last night with her white kimono tainted with blood, blood that came from a wound on her head, she mumbled something about Kenshin but she fainted before Sakura could understand what it meant.

"What's happening around here?" – Sakura asks out loud and turns to look at the door as she hears footsteps sees Katsura opening the door followed by Kenshin that held someone on his arms:

"Place her here." – Sakura stand up and her mouth opened when she saw who Kenshin was carrying: "Kaoru!"

Kenshin lay her down on the futon beside Tomoe's and his lips went to her forehead again: "I think it's getting worse."

"I'll get some water and find something to help lowering the fever." – realizing what was happening Sakuraleft the room immediately ready help..

Kenshin almost ran all the way from his house here. Kaoru became more and more quiet in his arms and he was worried. Lots of thoughts crossed his mind: Maybe she had inhaled too much smoke, maybe the wounds from the previous attack were demanding attention after what happened last night… One thing he knew: "She needs a doctor."

"I'll call one." – Katsura got up but Kenshin stopped him: "Not anyone. Call one of your trust, and don't tell anyone that it is for her."

This was Katsura's time to obey. He knew Kenshin had a point and even if he didn't understood what was it, he would help him and leave the explanations for tomorrow.

"What happened to Tomoe?" – he asked as he saw Sakura again.

She knelled down by Kaoru's side and placed a wet bandage on her forehead. "She appeared here last night, and she already had that wound. Seems to me that someone hit her on the head. She fainted before being able to say anything at all."

At Kenshin's eyes, this situation was strange. Who would want to hurt Tomoe? But before he could settle the ideas on his mind: "I already sent a man to call a doctor. But I Told them it was for Tomoe." – Katsura reappeared on the room and sat next to Kenshin: "What happened to Kaoru?"

The hands that rested on his thighs clenched against the fabric of his clothes: "You might think that I am being paranoid, but I think someone sent Aka on fire just to kill Kaoru."

Both, Sakura and Katsura, frowned. "Aka burnt out? How is Yumi and Yahiko and…"

"Don't worry Sakura-chan. Everyone is safe, as far I know." – Kenshin exchanged looks with Katsura: "Kaoru was the one only one who was trapped inside."

He didn't need to say more. Katsura understood.

"And because of that and some other things that I am still unable to understand, I ask your permission to guard this room." – Kenshin went straight to the point. He wanted to make sure he would fulfill the promise he made her. _I will stay there all time, ok?_

"Permission guaranteed." – Katsura replied immediately.

**:::::::::::::::::::::::**

_"Why do we die?" – se looked up at her father as he looked back at her in awe. Why in the world would a little girl like her ask such question?_

_"Well, it's the cycle of life: We born, live and die." – he crossed his legs and stared at the sky for a while as he was sure that another question was about to come: "That means you are going to die too?" – the worry on her eyes made his heart cringe. "Eventually." – There was no point in lying to her that was undeniable any way. "But Kaoru, you shouldn't focus on that. The most important things are the ones we do in life. How we live, how we give ourselves to our friends and family… We must do everything at our range to bring happiness to the people we love."_

_"You make me happy daddy." – she threw her arms around him and heard him laugh, then, he brushed her hair aside so that he could see her face: "You have to promise me one thing Kaoru." - She lifted her eyebrow and waited for him to continue: "Even if I am not here… You will never give up on your happiness, never."_

_Never…._

_Never…_

**::::::::::**

"No!" – she stretched her hand trying to bring back that memory, and only understood that it was a dream at the moment Sakura hold her hand in hers: "It was just a bad dream… Shhh…"

Her soft touch made Kaoru sigh. She was at Katsura's home. "Sakura." – she looked around and her eyes widened in shock as she found Tomoe was sleeping in the futon next to her.

"You slept for two days." – Sakura informed and Kaoru stared back at her surprised. _How could I sleep for so long? _ – "The fever was high until yesterday night and only left this morning."

"Fever?" – Kaoru automatically took her hand to her forehead.

"Yes." – Sakura sighed – "I am happy to see that you're better now."

Sakura didn't seem to mind about the rumors that surrounded her. She was there taking care of her… _He already showed his trust on you didn't he? – _Kenshin's words echoed in her mind. _Not only women have a sixth sense… some man also do. _Then Katsura's…"Thank you for taking care of me." – Kaoru smiled genuinely. A strange felling of "being home again" enlightened her eyes… "You're welcome."

"What happened to Tomoe?" – Kaoru glanced back at the woman behind her.

"I don't know. She appeared here a couple of days ago, injured. But she fainted before saying anything…." – Sakura stopped. _Should I say? _"but Kenshin's name."

Kaoru turned her attention to Sakura. "Are you saying that before fainting his name was the last thing she said?"

Sakura nod. "Do you have any idea of what…"

"I know exactly what it means." – Kaoru cut Sakura's words. Then she sighed and her face got serious: "Sakura, I think it's time for me to share the truth with someone."

**:::**

For almost an hour Kaoru explained the entire scenario to Sakura. Beginning in the day Iizuka appeared and told Kenshin she was the traitor until the moment Saito provided her Tomoe's diary. Then, the conversation with Tomoe and how she suspected that, after seeing her laying there, someone tried to shut her mouth too, so that she couldn't tell Kenshin the truth.

Sakura nod and asked some questions, but it was almost as if she was already expecting that kind of truth. "Yumi must know this, after all it was her life's project that was destroyed by Iizuka's greed." – Kaoru said a touch of guilt on her voice.

"I'll ask her to meet me here." – Sakura replied getting up.

"She probably doesn't want to see me, after all that happened." – Kaoru lowered her head and sighed. Even that Iizuka was able to take away. Her friendship.

"Probably not, because no one likes to be haunted by dead people."

Kaoru frowned at the sentence and only then Sakura realized that she forgot to tell her about Kenshin's plan: "Only me Katsura and Kenshin know that you are alive. It was Kenshin's condition to protect you."

Kaoru got up and walked to Sakura: "People think that I am dead?"

The other woman holds her hands in hers and tried to calm her: "Rest now, or Kenshin will kill me if he sees you up."

"Ah?" Kaoru stared at her taking her words as out of purpose.

Sakura looked at her intently for a moment before telling her: "He really cares for you, you know?"

"What do you mean?" – Kaoru knew what she meant, but she needed to hear it. After everything that happened she needed to hear it. Even if it wasn't from his mouth, to know that he saving her wasn't a dream… Made things more… real… She needed the confirmation that those words could give her.

Sakura knew this and so she said: "For this two days he didn't left this room, waiting for you to wake up.""This morning Katsura called him to a private meeting, that's the reason he is not here at your side… Just a few rooms away..."

Kaoru heart started beating faster. She wanted Kenshin to know everything, her indecision and secrets could led him to believe she didn't loved him, or maybe she didn't trusted him, but that wasn't the truth. She knew that now more than ever. "Maybe… we should tell him… Maybe we can end all of this. Since we don't get Tomoe between, so that she has the time to tell the truth by herself."

"They will ask who your sources are, and even if a name it's enough for Katsura and Kenshin, Okubo and the others will demand to know more. If you decide to share the truth with them, you'll have to showTomoe's secrets." Sakura knew those people well, if they knew the truth about Tomoe they would want to execute her for treason. "Take your time to think. You don't have to worry about Iizuka because Katsurasent him to Otsu to get some information I Think that it will keep him away for at least a week."

"Thank you." – Kaoru was confused but thankful to be heard and understood.

"And rest. You have the best samurai in Japan as your bodyguard." – she said signaling at the door's direction, smiling at the sight of Kenshin coming into the room.

The moment he saw her awake he stopped walking and stared at her. So many thoughts in his mind… Sakura left in the meanwhile leaving them alone. But Kenshin only noticed her absence when heard her voice a few meters away asking about her husband. So he walked towards her, took the sword from his hip and place it on his side as he kneeled next to Kaoru.

Kaoru lips curved into a smile. "Thank you for saving me, again."

A smile. She was smiling. Like the other night, when he saved her, but this smile was different, because she was alive, she was awake and conscientious and she was smiling at him, not as if he was a dream, but as a real person. This smile was real. And that brought relief to his heart: "Compensation…" – he lowered his head. "I need to compensate for the times I failed to save you."

She said nothing to that instead she placed her hand on his hoping that even in silence he could understand her feelings. And as the sun filled the room through the paper door she wished she could go on the outside: "Seems to be a pleasant day on the outside."

He immediately raised his head, eyes filled with concern: "Please don't leave this room."

She nod: "I know… Dead people don't use to walk around…" An image of the series walking dead appeared on her mind and she shivered at the idea of herself like one of those walkers: "Sakura told me."

He didn't masked how he felt about that, but it was a necessary evil: "I am sorry."

"That's ok Kenshin. I know the reason behind this decision." – she assured him: "It's just bad that people like Yumi and Yahiko Haruka Yumiko and Aoshi think that I am dead. They are my friends after all."

Kenshin turn up his nose as she referred at Aoshi as her friend. He couldn't picture them together without felling sick of jealousy… He needed to change the subject: "Do you miss Misao and Sanosuke?" – the question caught her by surprise. Knowing that it might seem out of scene he shrugged his shoulders: "Your friends…You told me about them once."

_Do you still remember that?_ "Yes, I even dreamt about them a few days ago..." – she smiled remembering her dream and the ice cream story: "Yes, I miss them a lot."

"The reason that you miss them so much, is because you don't feel home here, isn't it?" – he needed to know.

She blinked and thought for a while. " I miss them because they're my friends for so long, that it is almost as if a part of me is missing when they are not around. And here, in this country, things are strange. Where I came from, people don't act so suspicious… maybe that's because we are in peace… I never thought war could make people act so crazy around each other."

He shook his head. "How is it possible Kaoru? How is it possible for you to appear here and…" – he stared at her and she sighed. Kaoru had asked herself the same question over and over again: "I don't know… As I told you before I think that after my parent's death I was in a state… I think I never really wished to die, but I wanted to believe that my live in that moment was just a nightmare. My pain wasn't real… And maybe my wish was just too strong… And I end up here… With you."

"Do you want to go back there?" – he stared at her but she looked away. How it possible to answer that frankly? There was a time that she wished to be here in Japan with him, but there was also times that she would give everything to be in her country, with her friends…."You said you knew me from a

dream." – Kenshin's hands were still holdings hers, and his voice was calm and low as he looked at her with something like hope in his eyes.

A small smile formed on Kaoru lips as she remembered her dreams about him: "Yes… As a child you appeared in my dreams… It was you, but, just a little different…"

"How different?" – He didn't wanted her to think this was an interrogation, but he wanted so bad to believe her, but he needed to at least understand some of the circumstances that brought them together.

Kaoru closed her eyes for a while. Of course she knew the person on her dreams was him, but after all this time she needed to made an effort to remember the differences between the man on her dreams and the one in front of her now. They were the same person but they were different. "You seemed older…. and the scar on your cheek… its shape was an X, not like now."

The scar was something she had mentioned before…

**Flashback:**

_"__What happened to your face?" – she asked noticing he was there. His hand flew to the wound, covering it : "It's just a small cut."  
>Kaoru came closer: "It bleeds a lot, we must take care of that. Where's the first aid kid?"<br>"What?" – those words were new to him, what was she talking about? Kaoru widened her eyes in surprise but didn't answer. Facing her lack of words he decided to start moving to the inside and Kaoru followed him."I am going to fetch some water to clean the wound. " – she informed passing behind him.  
>"That's not really necessary." – he said<br>"Off course it is." – she ignored him-_

_"Kaoru-dono, I just need to rest, I'll take care of that later." – he took of the sword from his hip and placed it on the porch._

_"It's just a second, and I will stop bugging you." – she replied._

_After some minutes she reappeared on the porch along with a bucket of water and a strand of cloth. Kneeling beside him she started cleaning the cut:  
>"How did this happen?"<br>He didn't reply not wanting to scare her with details. She understood and asked nothing more._

_After a while she stooped cleaning it and stared at the wound: "This cut… It will leave a scar…" – her eyes widened as if she was remembering something, then words flew out of her mouth without her consenting: "The first part…" – she murmured_

_"The first part? " – he asked "The first part of what?"_

_"Nothing…" – she said nervously, shaking her head negatively._

_."Kaoru-dono, why don't you tell me the truth?" – it was easy for him to realize she was hiding something. "I told you I will not hurt you… "_

_"I know you don't wanna hurt me." – she answered - "You saved me." – she put the cloth inside of the bucket and took a deep breath. "It's just that it doesn't make any sense."_

_Kenshin leaned forward to look her in the eye: "Tell me." – his tone was calm. He could feel that she was experiencing a dilemma and he wanted to help her._

_"You're going to assume that I am crazy." – she turned her head to the side avoiding his gaze, but he didn't let his chance escape,Kenshin gently touched her chin forcing her to face him. "I thought you were crazy when you gave away your life to save someone you didn't know… So… Try me."  
>His eyes were scrutinizing every muscle of her face, anticipating her words or encouraging her to talk...<br>"I… think I've seen you before." – her words sounded like a whisper but once again he captured it.  
>"When?" – he asked is face not showing any difference from before.<br>She took another deep breath and said: "In a dream."_

_This time he reacted… He lifted his eyebrow "In a dream?"  
>"Ye…Yess… But in the dream you're a bit different." – Kaoru's hands were shivering – "I know you would think I am crazy, so let's just stop right here." – she has about to get up but Kenshin's arm made her stop. "I want to know the rest. Please how different was I?…"<br>Kaoru swallow hard - "You looked older… And… You had a scar… An X… in your left cheek."_

**_::::_**

Kenshin swallow hard: "Do you think that it's possible to happen otherwise?" – This was all crazy, but in the middle of all the nonsense there was some things that made sense to him.

"Going from here to Portugal?" Kaoru asked

He nod. "Hum hum."

"Seems fair… But I don't quite understand the process... Why?"

Kenshin thought for a while. A world in where he didn't have to kill, without streets and memories of the sins he committed… a World with her… He didn't mind leaving the few friends he had behind if he could replace them with peace of mind and happiness in his heart… And of course… with her. With no more stories of treason, and no more loyalty to anyone else and not her… " Because I never met the world in peaceful times Kaoru… And it seems an amazing view."

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Kaoru opened her eyes facing the darkness in the room. She couldn't remember how or when she fell asleep. _My senses are dizzily than before… Maybe it is because of the medication… _She looked at the door and smiled. Kenshin was sitting on the outside of the room: _Just like he promised._

Then her head turned to the woman laying maybe a meter from her. She was as beautiful as the porcelain dolls her grandma used to give her when she was a child… Pale face, black long hair… at the exception ofher lips, that were almost as pale as her skin…

_Please Tomoe, I want to keep the promise I made you… Please wake up soon._

**_:::::::::::::::.._**

Days passed by and next week was calm. Iizuka was out and that left Kaoru at ease. And,Kenshin usually spent most of his time by her side, except when Sakura came to see check on her. In those times he was "dismissed" to other duties so that they could have their female time together.

It was in one of those occasions that Yumi came to the house. It was by the end of the day, almost at dinner time.

Kaoru stood quiet observing her ex-boss reaction at the sight of her.

First the shock… then with a million questions in her mind, she kneeled down and touched Kaoru's face, just to see if she was real. Then…a smile… But after that her eyebrow knitted together and she spoke not in a very happy tone: "What the hell is happening here?"

::::::::

First reactions put aside, Yumi heard them both (Sakura and Kaoru) attentively. She understood the reasons that lead to so much secrecy and agreed to keep the secret. She wanted Iizuka to pay for what he did to, since he was the one to blame to what happened to her restaurant.

Sakura assured her friend that she and Katsura would do everything in their reach to help her to rebuilt Aka, and that made her sigh In relief. "It's being difficult… Since all that I have was there. Aka was my house too… But, I am sure we will be able to put everything together again."

"I am sorry Yumi this was my fault." – Kaoru lowered her head: "But as compensation, I promise that I will work for you for free till the rest of my life."

Yumi placed her hand on Kaoru's shoulder and laugh: "We talk about that when you find yourself able to work, girl. Besides, I don't want anyone in my restaurant working for free. It's bad publicity."

:::

It was nice for Kaoru to see Yumi again and to know she hold no grudge against her. And in the moment they were about to say goodbye, Kaoru felt the urgent need to go with them. Sakura denied immediately: "You can't be seen Kaoru."

"It's just a little walk to the front garden. The gates are high and no one will see me." – Kaoru insisted. She was tired of being in that room and since no one except Kenshin Sakura and Katsura were there, it shouldn't be a problem. Sakura end up agreeing. "Ok, but it needs to be fast. And I am sure that Kenshinis not going to like the idea."

"He doesn't need to know." – Yumi said.

The three women made their way to the front door, but Kaoru stood on the garden a few feet away from the main door.

It was the first time in a week that she left her room. Of course it wasn't as if she was a prisoner, but she missed seeing other things besides paper doors and walls.

"Now," – Sakura approached her: "Let's go to the inside before Kenshin finds out we are here."

Kaoru nod. "Hai!" – she followed the other woman. But then, right before she place her foot on the inside, she felt something, someone… It was a presence… At first she wanted to ignore it, because she knew it would cause her troubles, but then she couldn't go inside knowing that he was there. "Aoshi?"

She asked, still unsure if it was him or not. She had involuntarily learned how to feel presences around her. And there were few people that she could distinguish clearly. Sakura was light and contentment… her happy spirit always enlighten Kaoru's mood. Kenshin's presence was always calm. She could feel him stopping in front of the closed-door waiting for her to notice him and invite him… Wishing for her to invite him…

"I came to see how you were doing" - That voice. It was definitively him. Kaoru turned to face the man who had saved her life once. "I am fine. I am sorry that I wasn't able to tell you that I am alive. But it was…"

"For your protection." – he finished her sentence.

Kaoru was in an inner battle. She knew that every time she mentioned Aoshi, Kenshin changed the subject, she knew somehow In his misplaced sense of protection, he thought he needed to shield her fromAoshi. But Kaoru also knew Aoshi would never do anything else than help her. Kenshin and him wanted the same thing for her. Why in the world they couldn't get along?

"Yes…" – she took two steps in his direction but stopped hearing Sakura's voice warning her: "Kaoru…" Of course, that stupid story about choosing sides…Politics anyway. – she exchanged looks between her andAoshi and end up staying at the same spot: "Kenshin thought it was for the best."

"Hum…Hum." – he nod – "I see you're succeeded in your plan to prove your innocence."

"Not yet." – she took two steps in his direction. "I am depending on someone to that…"

His head nod in realization. Battousai learnt to trust her after all.

Kaoru smiled. "Thank you for coming. But I really need to go." – she made a move to go on the inside. Part of her wishing that he wouldn't take that as an offense, but the other half didn't wanted to cause any kind of trouble to the people who were giving her a place to stay. "I am happy to see you." And it was in the moment she turned to the inside that her face almost hit Kenshin's chest.

_Oh no…_

Kaoru swallowed hard. "Ken…shin." - her voice faltered. Kenshin was staying in front of her, but not looking directly at her. His eyes were locked on Aoshi, and as she looked back to the Okashira, his eyes too locked on Kenshin.

Both of them were in Battle Mode... Kaoru wanted to bring Kenshin out of that. She didn't want them to fight or hurt each other. She would feel miserable if that happened. So she touched Kesnhin's shoulder hoping her words would be enough to snap him out of that state. "Kenshin, Aoshi just came to see If I was ok."

He blinked and slowly turned his head to her staring at her for a while thoughtfully. Then, he stretched his hand to her.

Kaoru understood. He needed confirmation. Kenshin felt uneasy around her when it comes to Aoshi, so, he wanted her to show him that she would choose him and him alone. And even if that didn't make any sense, because Aoshi was just a friend, Kaoru agreed and accepted his hand. "Let's go on the inside." – she said. Then again, she turned to look one more time to Aoshi apologetically.

"We will meet again."

Aoshi's words made Kenshin stop walking and turned back to the man on the garden. Kaoru closed her eyes. _Dammit!_

"Stay away from Kaoru." – Kenshin growled.

"Or what Battousai?" – Aoshi wasn't the defiant man type. So why in the world was he acting like he was enjoying this?

"Are you so afraid of me that want me so far away?" – He said calmly, hands on his pockets, no trace of fear or anxiety. "You'll need my help very soon."

Kenshin left Kaoru's hand and walked out of the porch:"I am not afraid of you. You know I don't." – he placed his hand on the hilt of the sword

"Stop!" – Kaoru ran and placed herself between them. "Aoshi thank you for visit me, but I think It's better now if you leave, please."

Aoshi turned to her and then to Battousai.

"Kenshin, let's go inside please." – she pushed him to the inside but Kenshin's body was stiffen, still focused on Aoshi.

"Kenshin!" – she called his name again and only then he turned. "Kaoru, step aside please."

Kaoru couldn't believe that. Kenshin only used to fight if he had no other option. But here, she could see in his eyes… he wanted this… Kyprotnyte. Aoshi was Kenshin's kryptonite. He wanted nothing but to fight him.

Kaoru was still shocked with the tension that was building between them, and how the situation had changed. She watched terrorized as they positioned themselves to fight.

"Come, Kaoru." – Sakura's voice woke her. She turned her head to the woman on her side: "I can't let this happen. "- she said hopelessly .

"There's nothing you can do." – she answered pushing her to the side.

:

"We were meant to fight anyway…" – Aoshi took off his gabardine and Kenshin could clearly see his twokodachi one on each side. "Better sooner than never."

Still driven by that rush of adrenaline Kenshin answered: "Fight me will only prove that I am stronger." – his hand flew to the hilt of his sword.

"The emperor might be falling, but Oniwabanshu's glory won't fall with him. And as head of this group, I have to prove that I am stronger than the famous Hitokiri that put an end to Tokugawa's regime."

"How dare you use Kaoru to get to me?" – Kenshin's fists clenched.

Aoshi face didn't changed: "That's not true. When I saved her from Udo, I didn't knew who she was."

"Kenshin, stop this please!" - he heard her pleading – "Please, this is pointless! Aoshi saved me just as a good deed. Not because he knew who I was for you. " – she run into Kenshin direction and grabbed his sleeve: "Please Kenshin, stop this fight! Aoshi is my friend, if you ever hurt him I would never forgive you!"- Then she turned her attention to Aoshi: "Kenshin is the man I love! If you hurt him you'll hurt me too!"

Both man stared at her blankly.

"Don't you see? Either one way or another I will get hurt in the end! By your actions!" – she didn't knew if they were listening to her, but at least Kaoru needed to try. "By your stupid pride and stupid political divisions!"

"Do you mean what you said?" – she turned to see Kenshin looking at her intently.

"Of course I meant it! Don't you think that it's stupid to fight just because you think differently?" – she threw her hands up showing how tired she was.

"No, I am not talking about that." – he said: "I am referring to what you said before." – the look on his eyes changed. He was no longer focused on Aoshi… His attention was now to her.

Kaoru eyebrow lifted: "What are you talking about Kenshin?"

The red-haired samurai took her hand on his and brought her closer: "When you said that you loved me. Do you mean it?"

Kaoru eyes widened in surprise. "Oh." – _I said that out loud. _– Her cheeks flushed with embarrassment: "You know I do." – Kenshin smiled and stroke her face gently: "Then, If it is your wish… I will not fight."

Kaoru's lips curved into a smile. "Thank you Kenshin…" – she jumped to him in a hug: "Thank you so much." – he accepted her hug gratefully. He buried his face on her hair so that he could feel that sweet scent that only she had.

Perfection.

That was the word that would describe that moment….

But, he should know best that there is no such thing as perfection in his life.

At the moment he felt that something was about to hit him, he took her in his arms and jumped.

_What was that? _He thought as he land with her on the roof and stared at the garden above.

Chains, and in the edge of it, there was a metal claw attached.

Aoshi had his kodachis unsheathed.

_I've seen this before… But where?_

Kaoru was still on his arms he could feel her nails craving on his arm… she too scared to say a word.

"WATCH OUT!" - Sakura's scream woke Kenshin up, and he dodged the attack that came even from above him.

_It was Tight. _He thought as he landed on the garden again.

"Kenshin…"

"Don't worry anata… I'll not let anyone hurt…" – he stopped as he felt his hand wet. He stared at the floor and saw bloods drops, and then he looked back at her. "No, It can't be!"

:::::::::::::::::::::::

And another chapter.

I know it might seem a little confused, because too many things happen here.

I hope that you like it anyway.

And please... please... leave your reviews. I want to know what you're thinking.

Jou


	17. Chapter 17

**Thanks to Guest, Icy-kitty117 and Lydia the tygeropean for your reviews.**

**I am thinking about revising this story in the end, because of the grammar mistakes. **

**I would thank you if you just tell me some of them.**

**Chapter 17 - The Scar**

**:::**

Distant voices echoed in her mind, some were familiar others not. But she couldn't understand their meaning, they seemed so far away…

Then, one was suddenly close: _It was your fault that he died. _She would never forget that voice: Akira's mother and the pain written on her eyes. Even in that moment Tomoe felt unable to say a word, not even a "I am sorry", or something to stand up for herself like: "It wasn't my fault"… No. she lay her head down in a resolute silence.

She felt numb, wishing it was just a nightmare, because if it wasn't she wouldn't knew what to do. That's why she needed confirmation, she needed to know if he really was dead, and that was the reason she came to see his body, and only then, when she couldn't refuse to believe, because evidence were right in front of her… only then…

Nothing.

She thought she would know how to deal with it…

Tomoe was educated but no one had ever told her how to react to something like this.

With the death of her beloved weighting on her shoulders she decided that something needed to be done. Revenge. She decided she wanted to kill the man who caused her so much pain. He deserved to suffer, he deserved to die.

"Sister I will find a way… You'll suffer no more. That man will pay." – Enishi's voice was also clear in her mind.

How could she drag him to this? He was still a child!

But in that moment her heart didn't allowed her to think clearly… She didn't deserve that pain, she didn't! It was unfair! Battousai was the one to blame! He made her suffer and he didn't even knew her! So she threw all of her anger towards him… until the day she knew him.

He was smaller than what she imagined, he was kind, and he was… in love with a girl probably younger than her. And the look in his eyes when he stared at Kaoru… it reminded her so much of the way Akira looked at her. And then all her rage slowly disappeared as she realized she was making a mistake.

Then again She felt numb… like her body was now. Refusing to move even when she wanted so bad to get up and put an end to this.

_"Revenge is yours… He will suffer as you suffered, when you lost him."_ – Again Enishi's words ranged inside her head.

_As I suffered when I lost you my love…_ No one deserves to feel that, the pain of losing the person you love the most… _No one. _

::::

There was a deep cut on Kaoru's back. Kenshin places her next to Sakura, when Katsura and some of the guards appear.

"You need to take care of the one that is on the other side as I take care of this one." - Kenshin said didn't even looking at Aoshi. The Okashira obeyed and jumped to the roof.

"You just made your biggest mistake." - his amber eyes locked on his enemy - "You shouldn't have hurt her. Now, you're going to know how I get this title." -

:::

"The cut on her back reopened. This is where all this blood comes." – the doctor turned Kaoru's body and his hands tore apart what was left of her kimono on the affected area of her body. He stared at Sakura and his face was serious: "We need to stop the bleeding, or she will bleed to death."

**:::: **

Kenshin was exhausted after the match. That man was skilled but not good enough for him, in a normal situation he would kill him quickly, but his mind was not on the battle, it was on Kaoru. He had to put her away from his thoughts for a while so that he could concentrate on his enemy, otherwise that would be fatal to him.

As he did that, victory seemed to come at ease. And before the man's body hit the floor along with his chained claws, Kenshin was already on the inside kneeling next to Kaoru.

He had seen wounds before, he saw blood and all kinds of carnage, and it came to a point that his heart became insensitive. But not to this, not to her wounds. Kaoru's wounds affected him like they were his own. And for a moment he wished it was him laying there instead of her.

He saw the blood and the doctor yelling things he couldn't understand, he saw Sakura running in and out of the room with the things that old man asked, and all he could think was that it was his fault. And, for the first time in his life he prayed. Prayed that she could live on even if he had to stay away from her… She didn't deserved this pain, this suffer…

_I don't deserve you my dear Kaoru. No one that makes you suffer this much do… - _he bent his head and kissed her forehead.

**:::**

**::::**

_"We need you Kaoru. It's been almost six months since you're like this. The doctors, they are not sure, but they say that it's everything ok with your body… whatever is keeping you like this… it's yourself….It's hard for me to understand, why don't you want to came back?"_

_Misao paused._

_"I know you lost them, but what about us? Aren't we important? We are here Kaoru! We are your friends! No matter what happens we will support you, and you know that!"_

Misao had just heard from a nurse saying to another that all that they could do for Kaoru was done. Now it depended on her reaction. She was so sad after that. All she could ask was why? Why was Kaoru fighting against coming back?

_"You should talk to her…But not in a blaming tone." – _Misao didn't notice the female doctor entering the room_. "Maybe she wants to wake up but her mind is too numb and it could take a while."_

She wanted them to wait more?_ "But Dr Megumi, isn't dangerous for someone to stay like this for so long? It's been six months already."-_

The doctor explained:_ "Some of her motor functions (like walking) might be affected for a while, maybe she will have to learn to do that again, her senses will be numb… and some other small things. But keep your hopes high Misao, I believe your friend is going to recover soon." – she placed a hand on Misao's shoulders and offered her a smile: "Hope." – then she turned to the machine that was connected to Kaoru and wrote down the numbers in it and left._

_"Do you hear that? She believes in you, please Kaoru, come back to us."_

**::::**

**:::::::::::::::**

Kenshin sighed as he walked away from her room. He felt his prayers were answered when she first opened her eyes after two days ago. She was weak but alive. And that was all he could ask.

He had a sinking feeling inside him.

Exceptionally Aoshi's presence was allowed in that house as he presented himself as Kaoru's friend. And after what happened two days ago Kenshin couldn't deny that. The Okashira defeated the other man on the roof and seemed to want nothing more than Kaoru's safety. And that was why Kenshin was not in her room now. Sakura was with Kaoru as Aoshi was visiting.

Aoshi's presence didn't affect him like before, but he couldn't come to love it. Every time he appears Kenshin feels like he is reminded of how he failed to protect Kaoru. And for a samurai like him, the acknowledge of his own flaws was devastating.

He sighed looking at the door one more time before we went to the outside.

_I need to let that go. _

**:::::::::::**

Kaoru stood up to a sitting position.

"Don't push yourself, you will not elude death forever, Kaoru." – the warning tone of his voice made her laugh.

"Don't worry. I am not intending to die." – she smiled and looked at Sakura: "Not now." – _Not now that things between her and Kenshin were getting back to normal. It was just a matter of time until Tomoe wakes up and…_ "Oh! I almost forgot!" – Kaoru glanced at Sakura: "Do you know where that small box is?"

Sakura nod: "Yes. I put it here." – she got up and opened the wardrobe. "It's here." – she gave Kaoru a small grey box.

Kaoru smiled. She had planned this so long ago… Even when Kenshin and her weren't in good terms… she turned to Aoshi: " May I ask you a favor?"

**:::::::::::::::::**

"Himura?" – Saigoro approaches Kenshin with an envelope in hands. "Is that for me?" – Kenshin's asks.

The other man shook his head negatively: "No. It's for the girl: Tomoe. But she is still… asleep. What I am supposed to do with this?"

Kenshin shrugged his shoulders: "Give it to me. I will left it in her room."

:::::

As the samurai walk along the hallway to her room, He notices the door was open. Immediately he fastened his pace and stopped in front of the door.

His eyes widened in shock as he saw Tomoe's state. She was awake, but her face was as pale as snow, and her yukata was wet with sweat. She was panting as if she just ran for hours. Kenshin also noticed she just used all her strength to reach the door and open it.

"Kenshin… I… I need to…" – she tried to talk but she was hyperventilating. Kenshin stepped into the room and help her to sit on her futon. "Shhh… Take your time."

She tried to calm herself. He was here, it was now. Kenshin wasn't going anywhere until she told him everything. .. But then her eyes stuck in what he had in hands, an envelope with her name. "What's that?" – she asked immediately fear starting to grow inside her.

Kenshin glanced at the envelope in his hand: "It arrived for you just a few minutes ago. I was in my way to place it here, when I saw you're awake."

She turned to him: "How many days was I out?" – worried written all over her face.

"A few days… Since the fire on the restaurant." – Kenshin answered

She took the envelope of his hands and Kenshin stared at her for a while: "If you want some privacy, we can talk later."

She immediately nod. And although he found her change odd, Kenshin got up and left.

::::::::::::::::::

Nervously she read the letter. The message was short but enough to make Tomoe became in an alert state.

_Come to us, or we kill the brat. _

**::::::::::::::::::::: **

Kenshin figured that Aoshi had already left, so he made his way to the room Kaoru was. As he slide the door open he informed Sakura that Tomoe was already awake, and that probably she would be in need of care, since she looked weak.

He didn't knew why a glint of hope appeared in Kaoru's eyes, but he choose not to ask. Since she was conscious, he wanted to spend some time with her, he felt he needed that, now more than ever.

_Only if I could take you away from this place…_

He sat in front of her and even if she was smiling at him, Kenshin couldn't stand to look at her in the eye. "I am sorry Kaoru, once again you're suffering because of me."

She placed her hand in his and her tone was so comforting that for a while he thought she wasn't in pain anymore. "Kenshin please, don't blame yourself." – she squeezed his hand, and he finally looked up at her: "You don't have to carry the world on your shoulders just because you're strong."

He sighed disagreeing.

Kaoru knew he felt guilty of many things, and even… if someday they would come to live together, and be something more that what they were now… every time he saw the scars that her clothes usually hide, all that guilt would surface again. "What happened to me, could happen to anyone."

He closed his eyes and sighed. "I am tired of this, of this bloodshed of this place…" – his voice sounded like a whisper, more like he was praying… Was he is praying?

"What do you mean?" – Kaoru asked. Was he talking about Katsura's house? Could be, he spent much time there than in his own place.

Kenshin opened his eyes and answered her with sincerity: "Every… inch of this city brings me bad memories…" – he bit his bottom lip: "Sometimes I just wish that we could move on to somewhere different. Somewhere new." – he took her hand to his mouth and kissed it gently: "And start over again."

Kaoru blushed with the unexpected gesture: "What's keeping you from doing it?"

He raised his eyebrow in surprise: "I have to wait until you get better, to take you with me." – he said as if it was obviously something that she should already know.

Kaoru lips curved into a smile: "Do you? And where do you wanna take me to?"

"Isn't it obvious?" – he placed his other hand on top of hers and stared straight at her with those giant violet eyes. "I want you to show me your world."

For a second Kaoru felt she was lost in his eyes, only when the meaning of his words reached her brain she woke up, but he continued: "The one that you always talk about… I want to meet your friends..." – his hand flew to her face and traced her lips. "I want you to teach me how it is to live in peace, how it feels to be truly happy." – Kaoru closed her eyes and smiled. His voice was like a melody to her. "And I know I don't deserve you, I know my hands are dirty while yours are clean. I know I am monster, But, you're the only one that can make me happy Kaoru."

Kaoru used all the strength she had to wrap him in an embrace. "You're not that Kenshin, you're not a monster, please don't use that words to describe you."- Slowly she made him place his head on her lap, while she caressed his face and played with his hair: "You're the man I love, always had been. And you do have the same right to be happy, just everyone else does, or even more, my love."

He exhaled in relief. Her lap was so warm and relaxing that he felt he had already reached a part of that peace he wanted so much : "That means you're going to show me your world?"

"You're my world Kenshin." – she tried to bend and kiss him but her back complained reminding her that her wound was still fresh. Noticing that, Kenshin, placed one hand on her side, supporting the weight of his body, and with the other on the back of her neck, his face slowly came close to hers. He missed her lips, he was anxious to taste them, so much he forgot his senses telling him that someone was approaching, and went ahead and kissed her.

His lips were hot just as much as the hand on her neck… And Kaoru was ready to enjoy more and more of this moment but, Kenshin stopped abruptly and she only noticed the motive when saw Sakura standing on the door, blushing at the scenario in front of her: "Ops… I am sorry to…" – the woman was clearly embarrassed. "Interrupt."

_It was a short kiss… _Kaoru thought that no one in the world could blush more than Sakura, but that opinion changed when she turned her attention to Kenshin. He was as red as a tomato.

Since Sakura was too embarrassed to say a thing, she just gave Kenshin a paper.

He read it and looked back at her. "The boy is her brother, Enishi. Where is she?"

Sakura shook her head: "I've been looking for her since you told me she was awake, and couldn't find her."

"Tomoe?" – Kaoru asked glancing between Kenshin and Sakura.

The other woman nod.

"When I found her awake she said she wanted to tell me something, but I insisted that she should rest… she seemed so weak. "Kenshin sighed frustrated: "I would like to help, but I won't leave Kaoru's side." Then, he felt Kaoru grabbing his sleeve: "Kenshin, please… Take her back."

He denied. "No. I won't leave you here alone."

"I am not alone." – she replied.

But Kenshin was firm in his conviction."No Kaoru. I have a bad feeling about this."

"Tomoe is just another victim in this scheme and she is the only one that can give you the name of the traitor." – that was it. She had said it.

"What are you talking about?" – he looked puzzled at her – "And even if what you're saying is true… how would I know where to find her?"

"The Black forest. I don't know if it was Saito or Aoshi who told me something about a group that works there… They want to destroy Ishin. I am almost sure that she went there. And it's snowing isn't it? Can't you follow her footsteps?"

Kenshin sighed in exasperation.

**::::::::::::::::::::**

_I have a bad feeling about this… _Kenshin thought as his foot buried in the snow making it hard for him to walk: _I am going to regret this decision…. _He stared at the mountain. It wasn't a long path, but the snow was slowing him down, what pissed him off, since all he wanted was to come back to Kaoru's side as soon as possible. Besides he couldn't shut down the inner voice screaming inside his of head: _Go back…_

Kenshin was determined to do it, just because she asked him to. But if something happened in his absence, he would never forgive himself.

Almost half way there, Kenshin noticed how odd this place was. It was winter and there shouldn't be no leaves left on the branches but the trees were full of them like the winter never came to them, and They were darker than usual, almost black. Probably that was why people called this place the Black Forest. On top of all the energy there was… strange… deadly. He knew he was being watched, but it was so silent, that for a while he thought that even the wind stopped blowing. And it was in that moment the first attack came.

Kenshin dodged easily. And when he looked to see whatever tried to hit him, he saw another claw attached to a chain, like the one from two days ago, when Kaoru got hurt. _They don't give up._

He looked up at a tree as he saw the chain being pulled up by a man dressed like a ninja. Kenshin didn't wait to strike, and even when the ninja dodged, Kenshin still managed to hurt his right arm.

The man fell on the ground, his blood tainting the snow. Then probably realizing that there couldn't fight him with his arm injured like that, he did something strange: He took some snow to his mouth and pushed a chain that was hidden below it.

What happened next made Kenshin fell from the tree hitting hard on the ground.

**:::**

It was all fuzzy for a while. He got up but his body wasn't ready yet. The explosion had affected his hearing . Kenshin's hand flew to his ear as he felt liquid coming out of it. It was blood. _This is not good._

He searched for the ninja but all he could see was pieces of his body, here and there. _Why would he do that? He knew the explosion would kill him to!_

Although that, Kenshin forgot the logic and the fussiness in his head along with the exasperating noise inside his ears and move on.

He didn't take much long until he saw another ninja straight ahead.

This one didn't have any chain or claw, but Kenshin knew, with all his experience, that hidden weapons were the dangerous ones. As he ran to him, forgetting all of his pain, the ninja dodged all his attacks with agility. _I am slowing down… _Kenshin realized.

It wasn't easy to fasten his attacks when his audition was affecting his balance. _I have to do it. _This guy was fast! _But not as fast as me! _

_Don't be lazy! _He remembered his master's voice. _You would be perfect if you weren't so lazy my baka deshi!_

"No!" – Kenshin unsheathed the other sword with his left hand – "I can't be lazy, not when it comes to Kaoru!" – the ninja was caught by surprise with Kenshin left strike. Kenshin's sword cut through his stomach and the man fell careless on the ground.

Kenshin turned his back on him and started walking again. _I have no time to waste. _

Behind him, the ninja picked up his darts and threw one directly to Himura's shoulder. _That will do it._

Then, like the other before him, he took the snow to his mouth and pulled another chain.

Kenshin's knees hit the ground, this time not because of the explosion, but because his vision was blurry and his head was spinning. He immediately realized he has been poisoned.

_Who are this people?_

** :::::::::::::**

Katsura walked frantically from one side to another, when he heard the second explosion: "We have to go there and see what's happening."

"Do you think it's prudent?" – Shishio asked – "This explosion seems distant than the first one."

Katsura shook his head: "I need to know what's happening. Gather the men!"

As Shishio left to call the others, Yutaro said: ""We must call Kenshin, to come with us too." – he was ready to go on and do it when Katsura's hand stopped him: "No, Kenshin is with Kaoru, let's allow him to have some rest. He deserves it, and we can handle this by ourselves. Also this house is safe as long as he is on the inside."

**:_:::**

He had never been like this before. So… weak. Kenshin's ears were bleeding, his head was fuzzy and his body was so numb… ready to shut down at any time… But he kept walking.

He could barely see, but there were three people waiting for him near the house. Kenshin recognized one of them was Tomoe.

"Now this will end." – the man with grey hair said as he started walking towards Kenshin.

The red-haired man was visibly exhausted and didn't saw the other one coming into his direction. So when he was punched right in the face, he didn't know for where that punch came from. Kenshin swung his sword in every direction, as he couldn't figure where his enemy was.

This was a lost battle since the beginning.

::

"This is not fair." – Enishi heard his sister saying. He shook his head negatively. A few minutes ago, when she was asked about Battousai's flaws, the only thing she said was: _He is to kind. _And now, she was acting as if she was worried about his fate in battle. Why was she acting like this around this man? He stole her happiness!

Fear grew inside his heart as his sister looked at him apologetically and ran to the battlefield, with her dagger In hand.

Then, everything happened so fast, that Enishi didn't even have the time to mutter a single word.

She placed herself between the two of them, while they were fighting, and tried to kill the taller one. The next thing Enishi saw was his sister's white kimono tainted with blood, as she fell on the arms of the red-haired samurai.

**::**

Kenshin felt the weight of a body falling in his arms making him fall on his knees . As he looked down he immediately recognized who was: "Tomoe…" – he whispered her name, as she contorted in pain. "I am sorry." – she said with tears on her eyes. "It will bleed no more." – he ignored the fact that she was using her dagger to slash the left side of his face: "Tomoe, why?" – Kenshin asked regret filling him realizing what just happened. "I am sorry…" – she took a deep breath, as much as she could and added: "Kaoru, Kaoru, go to her."

"I have to take you to a doctor." – Kenshin tried to lift her but she protested: "No. She needs you, now, or it will be too late…" – he stared at her: "Why?"

"She is just someone who loves you too much and…" – she tossed and the dagger on her hand fell in the snow. "I can't have her death weighing on my conscience." Then she smiled for the first time since he met her and replied: "Akira…"

Kenshin watched in horror as the woman on his arms gave her last breath.

And there were so many contradictory feelings inside him now.

Should she leave her there?

Should he take her with him?

_No. I need to go to Kaoru… she is my priority now. _

When he left he asked a guard of his trust to stay at the entrance of her room, and he knew he would do everything in his grasp to fulfill the task he gave him but… _her death weighing on my conscience…_he remembered Tomoe's last words.

So, he got up and started running, as fast as he could in his condition.

_Kaoru Just wait for me… Please don't let it be too late._

**:::::::::::::::::**

Iizuka made his entrance after Katsura left with the guards. Only four guards were left in the house, and he knew they would never suspect him. T

he three on the outside weren't a danger. But, as he gets inside he notice there was one guarding a room.

"Hai Tsetuma!" – he greeted him – "What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be guarding the entrance like Shinji, Kaji and Chen?"

The boy answered: "I was asked to guard lady Kaoru."

_So she is here… and Himura is out_: "Who asked you to do that?"

"Himura himself." – he said proudly. Iizuka knew Tsetsuma looked at Kenshin as his model and it would be difficult to persuade him to act against his orders.

"I'll do that. You are needed outside." – he tried, but the boy didn't faltered: "I am sorry, but Mr Himura said that I shouldn't leave this place even if someone told me to."

Iizuka tried again, there was no need to kill him if he collaborates: "Mr Himura is my friend, do you think I would ever do anything to hurt is girlfriend?"

The boy raised his hands defensively: "I am not saying that. But you understand as good as I, that orders are orders."

"Ok kid." – Iizuka turned his back on him. "You could be good someday…" – _Unfortunately for you, that day will never come _–"I am sorry, I really liked you, but…" – he turns around and craves a katana on Tsetsuma chest – "Bigger things than you and I are at stake kid." - the guard fall on his knees still trying to understand why was one of the most antique members of IShin doing this to him.

::

Kaoru gasps as she sees the door sliding open and the guard, Tsetsuma laying on the floor.

Sakura immediately gets up and tries to face Iizuka, but he knocks her down punching her on the stomach. She faints.

Kaoru watches in horror as the responsible of her fatalities makes his way towards her.

"Finally alone." – he said.

**::::::::::::::::::: **

**So, How was it?**


	18. Chapter 18

**First of all, thanks to Icy-Kitty117;Cerulean Twin;Taishou;aerie50 who read and reviewed last chapter.**

**I was doing everything I could to make this the last chapter. But there is a lot of information that I need to think about how I am going to write... I don't wanna rush things...Anyway, I will do my best to post Chapter 19 until next Sunday.**

**This one is short, but I hope you to enjoy it.**

**::::**

**Chapter 18– Past and Present**

Kenshin left her dead woman's body on the snow. She deserved a funeral; she didn't deserved to be left that way. But he needed to rush to Kaoru. Tomoe was dead, there was nothing he could do to change that, but Kaoru… she needed to be alive.

As he ran, as fast as he could in the few strength he had to Katsura's place he saw his own friends coming in his way. Kenshin shook his head: "What are you doing here?"

"We came to see what the explosions were." – Katsura said surprised to see Kenshin there.

The red-haired samurai widened his eyes in realization: "What about Kaoru? You left her alone?"

"No,… I mean,I thought you were with her."

Kenshin felt like his stomach was being punched. _This was a trap. _"Tomoe is dead, please, bring her body down, so that she can be returned to her family. Her brother was there too."

Katsura nod even if he didn't quite understood what Kenshin was saying. Was Tomoe dead? But the samurai had already left with no more answers. Even if he seemed weak, Kenshin still managed to run faster than a regular man.

**::::**

**::::::::::::::::::::::**

Her heart was pounding furiously inside her chest. She felt helpless. Sakura was down, the guard was dead was she was alone, with no chance to escape.

Kaoru stares at the man in front of her with rage with her eyes: "Why?" - she asked not really thinking that he would give her an answer. He was there to kill her, not to chat with her.

He shrugged his shoulders: "I personally don't believe in none of their ideals, nor democracy or imperialism. But, I was Katsura's friend and he moved crowds around him. The way he talked he really impressed people, his speeches about freedom and equality for all…" – then he turned to her: "They even impressed me for a while. I dreamed I could be his right arm… I don't had any qualities as a fighter, like the others, but he accepted me in this group as a courtesy…" – Iizuka's expression changed to one of hate and despise. "He never said that, but I know he really have no use to me, and everyone thinks of me as expendable. And I got tired of that."

Iizuka was Katsura's friend? Kaoru never noticed they were friends, she always thought about them as boss and employee. "That makes your betrayal even worse…"

Somehow her words annoyed him: "Shut up! I haven't finished yet!"

Kaoru tried to control her breath… if at least she wasn't in so much physical pain, she would attempted to escape.

"As I found this weirdos from the forest… they somehow managed to pay more than Katsura, if I just help them to destroy Ishin." – his voice was odious, she hated how it sounded, but he ignored Kaoru's reaction and continued telling his story: "At first I refused, after all Katsura was… a friend… but then" Iizuka took two steps towards her: "That's when you're red-haired samurai appeared. He was just a child. But I don't know why Katsura trusted him so much. And as time passed by, and more important people died by his sword, Ishin goal became more than a dream." – he glared at her: "And that couldn't happen. No, not by Himura's hands! He couldn't take the glory of these events, he was just a murderer after all! So I went to these guys and told them that if we could destroy Battousai, then they could destroy Ishin too."

"You're an horrible man, you did this just to feed your greed?" – she took a step forward facing him: "Kenshin never wanted a bright spot! He even thought about giving up.."

"But destroying Battousai seemed impossible." – he ignored her words and continued: "I Saw every plan we made being crushed by him. I Sent the strongest and the smartest after him, but he always turned them into nothing more than pieces of dead flesh. When they came for him, they were as good as dead. Himura didn't seemed to have any flaws any weak points…" – then his face changed and he grinned: "Until… you appeared." He took another step towards her, and this time Kaoru stepped back: "It was then that I realized that, If I couldn't kill his body, maybe we could destroy his soul… using you."

Kaoru widened her eyes:"That's why you spread the rumor that I was the traitor, so I could take the blames and maybe Katsura would put Kenshin away!"

"Of course, if he could be deceived by a woman… maybe he wasn't worthy of Katsura's trust."

"That was a stupid plan, it was obvious it was going to fail." – How could he think that Katsura would sent Kenshin out of Ishin just because of that?

"Yes, it was a failure." – Surprisingly he agreed: "First Udo, then the fire in Aka, and then again, in here…."He laughed : "Damnit girl… you're simple refuse to die! What I am going to die with you?" – he stretched his hand to touch her hair, but Kaoru snapped his hand away.

He seemed amused by her reaction: "I thought that maybe three times was enough, but as a punishment to interfere in my plans…I am going to make you suffer so much, that you will wish you have died before."

"Kenshin will come for me." – Kaoru said more to herself then to him.

"Do you think?" – his hand went to his ear: "Haven't you heard the explosions? You're dear samurai is probably dead now."

Kaoru gasped. She heard the explosions, but she never thought it would have something to do with Kenshin. She couldn't hide the fear anymore.

Iizuka grunted:"Even if he isn't dead, he is in no condition to come and rescue his princess…"

"You're bluffing!" – Kaoru tried to fight back the feeling inside her chest, but she was afraid that he was telling the truth.

"No I am not. And to prove you that I have all the time in the world, I will have some fun with you first…" – he grabbed her close to him and even if Kaoru tried to push away, as he craved his nails on her back, that tortuous pain made her stop."Take your hands of me!"

"Maybe if you ask nicely." – he whispered at her ear.

She hated him, she hated his smell she hated his breath over her: "Let me go!" – Kaoru trampled on his feet with all her strength. Iizuka grunted in pain and threw her against the wall, making her hit her head hard.

Kaoru starts seeing everything spinning around…With No Sanosuke to stand up for her, No Kenshin to come and save her. Was was she going t make it? Was he dead? Was he so injured that he couldn't come to save her?

_Is this the end? Am I going to die, now?_

_You will not elude death forever Kaoru… - _she remembered Aoshi's words and how everything seemed to make sense now. She was going to die…. "Kill me Iizuka! That's all you ever wanted isn't it? Then go ahead and kill me." – she said trying to support herself on the wall. She couldn't clearly see him, since her head was so dizzy… Kaoru felt like she was on a carousel.

"I went through all of this and now you wanna rush my grand finale? No, No."

He kicked her on the stomach and she falls down.

"Don't sleep princes; it's too early for that." – he knelled down and lifted her chin. "She is out…." – he sighed. "But I didn't want to kill you so soon…. First I need to have some fun…" – his lips curved: "Well, maybe I can wait a bit more."

**:::::::::::.**

**:::::**

**:::::**

**:::::::**

Suddenly his repugnant voice didn't reach her ears anymore...

Silent. So quiet and so calm.

A warm hand was grabbing hers… and it was then when she heard his voice… even if it was from far, she knew it was her old friend…

_"I am sorry I wasn't able to help you Missy… If it was someone trying to hurt you, I swear, I swear I would kick his ass and do everything in my reach to protect you… But I just didn't notice you were hurting yourself so much."_

There was silence again for a while. Kaoru tried to talk, but she couldn't. It was like when you dream that you're running, but you never get out of the same spot because your legs don't move… Well, in her case, it didn't matter how hard she tried to speak, no voice came out.

"But I can't stand see you here anymore!" – she was puzzled by the way he said his next words. There was hurt, sadness and even a glint of anger in his voice. "I had hope that you would fight against this stupid coma. But coming here every day to see you like this… it kills me. Damn Missy don't you get it? I don't have parents too! Misao and you are all that's left of my family. So, I refuse to believe that you're not going to get up from this bed anymore!" – Sano's voice cracked, and there was silence again.

Was he crying? Was her old tough and bad-ass friend crying?

"I am sorry Missy…That's not your fault… What's this? Hey? Kaoru?… wait I will call the doctor, just wait ok?"

**::::::::::::::::::::::**

"It was Short nap princess."

"No…" – Kaoru murmured – "Not you again..." – she wanted so much to cry, not only because of what happened with Sano, but also because she felt helpless in both situations…

"Ohhh… were you having a good dream?...Well I can give you something good before you go…" – he picked her up by the obi around her chest – "It will be an amazing goodbye gift…"

Kaoru was tired, physically and mentally. She didn't have the strengths to fight anymore. And if Kenshin was dead, and her friends were suffering because of her, what was the purpose on living anyway? "Iizuka… just kill me… please."

He ripped off one of the sides of her kimono exposing her leg : "What a snow-white…"

She used the few strengths she had, to say: "I can't take it anymore, please kill me." – Kaoru knew what was his idea of fun, and she would rather die than live with the memories of such thing.

"Just wait a bit, ok?"

She felt so angry. How could he do this to her? How could this man do this to the people who always trusted him? "Someday You're going to suffer… You will be punished for all the wrong you did." – she opened her eyes to stare deep into his.

He only shrugged his shoulders: "Yes, maybe… But until that day comes… You're going to suffer first…"

**::::::::::**

"Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!" Iizuka hairs rose hearing that voice. He immediately left Kaoru fall. "Can't be!"

He turned around to attest that his ears weren't fooling him. _He must be immortal!_ He thought as he saw Kenshin panting, with blood on his face, ears and his hands.

Kenshin stared at him as if he couldn't believe what his eyes were seeing. First there was shock, but then as he acknowledge that the situation was real, Himura's eyes turned into amber.

_I can't fight him, even if he is weak – _he thought

"How dare you!" –Seeing part of her clothes were ripped apart, Kenshin jumped to conclusions that would make Iizuka's head roll– "I never believed her… I choose to believe you when you told me about the treason…. And when she told it wasn't she, I put the informant out of any suspect… I put you away of any suspect…I thought that maybe you were misinformed." – Kenshin unsheathed his sword and Iizuka didn't had the time to scream, before he could move Kenshin's sword was already trespassing his stomach: "No one else is going to suffer by your hands anymore." – Kenshin turned his sword causing Iizuka more pain, and didn't even care to take it away.

Leaving him behind Kenshin kneels at Kaoru's side and grabbed her hand. She opened her eyes: "Kenshin…." – her lips curved into a smile as she mumbled: "Your scar, is just like in my dream…"

**::::::::::::::::::::::::**

**::::::::::::::::::**

When Katsura and the others arrived Kenshin had already taken Kaoru and Sakura to their rooms. Both of them were only fainted. Kaoru was now conscious but Kenshin didn't allow her to get up: "The injure on your back is fresh, I don't want it to open again."

She obeyed. Mostly because her head was aching. "How is Sakura?"

"She is fine." – he smiled.

"And you Kenshin? What happened?" – The first thing that caught her eye was the scar on his cheek, but when she took a good look at him, concern filled her heart.

Noticing that, he assured her:"I am fine."

"You don't seem fine to me. What happened? What about the explosions?" – Kaoru asked. _It was my fault, I should never asked him to go. _"I am so sorry Kenshin… I…" – then she remembered of someone: "Where is Tomoe?"

Kenshin sighed. How was he going to explain her that? But before he could say anything else, he felt a familiar presence: "Aoshi is here, I will ask him to stay with you while I take a bath." – he hated the smell of blood that was impregnated on his body. Tomoe's blood. "And, after that, I promise you that I will answer all your questions, ok?"

Kaoru sighed. She knew that Kenshin was hiding something.

**:::**

As Kenshin left her room, he knew Aoshi was on the other side waiting. "What does a doctor say?"

"Most of the wounds will heal quickly." _ Others will never heal._ Kenshin replied: "She is fine for now."

"What about Iizuka?" – Aoshi heard that he was at loose. How could Battousai leave him alive, after what he did?

"He can't be far… He was too injured, I thought he was dead." – Kenshin was so worried about Kaoru that he didn't noticed Iizuka was still alive. When he came back to the hall, he wasn't there anymore, but he didn't risk to leave Kaoru alone again.

Aoshi nod. "I will set up a perimeter and if we found him I tell you."

"Thank you Aoshi." – Kenshin glanced at the man in front him. The Okashira's face showed no emotion. He was a very hard man to read. "Could you stay with Kaoru for a while? I need to do something, but I don't want her to be alone."

Aoshi nod again and Kenshin left to the bathroom.

**::::: **

"It's perfect Aoshi, thank you." – she said looking at the object inside of the box.

He gave her no answer; instead he stared at her thoughtfully.

"What's the matter?" – Kaoru asked. It wasn't usual to see Aoshi so lost in thoughts.

His eyebrows rose. He himself didn't understood why he was thinking about that… Since very young his focus was one and only: The Oniwabanshu. He freely chose to ignore the beautiful women that used to show some affection around him. "Is that what people call love? "

Kaoru eyes widened: "What?"

He never thought about that. At first when he saw everything that Kaoru went through because of Kenshin, he thought it was just an obsession. The way she talked about him, the look on her eyes every time she saw him… But when he saw Kenshin, the famous Battousai showing concern and protectiveness around Kaoru... "Never mind." – he felt that maybe he was missing something by letting his opportunities pass by. Maybe he needed someone to balance his dark side too.

**::::::::::::**

**::::::::::::.**

**:::::**

Iizuka stared at the blade that was still trespassing his stomach. He knew that he could move faster without that, but he also knew that if he took it off, he would bleed to death. He escaped alive from Kenshin's sword. What a miracle was that?

He was probably being chased now, and it killed him to think that, all the money he received from Chiro wasn't going to help him now.

"Hiding like a rat." - he heard a familiar voice saying.

"Show yourself your coward!" – he yelled

Then a shadow emerged from behind the trees. A shadow of a man holding a sword. "Makoto." – he sighed in relief. He was afraid that it would be Kenshin or AOshi. He knew he would have no chance with them, but with this one, maybe he could negotiate. "Help me to get to the doctor and I share the money I earn from Chiro with you."

Shishio approached: "So he still managed to pay before he died."

"Yes. I am smart, do you think I would work for free?" – Iizuka almost laughed at this point

"I don't know… you're still the guy who got caught." – Shishio grinned – "But I don't blame you for that… after all, no one escapes me, and since I was sent after you…" – he unsheathed his sword: "A rat like you should never have the privilege of dying by my sword."

"I don't believe you're fighthing for this stupid revolution!" – Iizuka tried to buy some time.

"You're right, I am fighting for me. I am fighting for a country that someday I will rule on my own. A country were the weak like you are food to predators like me." – he positioned himself and launched his attacked upon Iizuka. It was quick and clean. Iizuka's head fell off from his neck and hit the floor.

"I will assume this is just a way for you to repair the damage you made on Aka." – he took the money out of Iizuka's dead body.

"It's her restaurant, after all." – he place the money inside of his clothes and looked at the body one more time before he left: "See you in hell."

**:::::::::::**

**So now, the bad guy is dead. **

**Kenshin and Kaoru's life is going to be a bed of roses... Well, maybe not...**

**Lets just say that last chapter will definitively affect their lives forever. **

**Hope to hear your opinions. And thanks once again to the ones who reviewed and also to those who Favorited and follow this story for so long.**

**Jou**


	19. Chapter 19

_**Sorry that I couldn't post till Last Sunday, as I said I would try. But, this is it: The last Chapter.**_

_**I want to thank to the 54 people who follow this story, to the 19 who favorite it and the 69 who reviewed.**_

_**It's such a privilege to me to have so many people reading it and enjoying the chapters even if they have grammatical (an other kinds of) mistakes. **_

_**Thanks for your support. It means a lot to me. Few years ago, I gave up on writing in English because it was difficult to me to express things the way I wanted. And sometimes... I feel that difficulty remains. Just as a comparison ****The Portuguese version of this story has 30 chapters... But this story was always the "story of my heart" the one I've always wanted to write, I've always imagined it, since I was a child, so I wanted to make it public not only to my Portuguese readers but also to you... **_

_**I have some other projects in English in mind. You'll find more about them in the end of the chapter.**_

_**I think that With your help and some time I will do my best to "polish" my writing.**_

_**Well, enough talk, this is it:**_

**::::::::::::::::**

**THE FINAL CHAPTER:**

**Chapter 19 – A Timeless Gift**

Kaoru heard in silence as Kenshin explained everything that happened on the mountains. The strange ninjas, the explosions, Tomoe's death and the way she "draw" that scar on his face.

It was sad that she had to die, even if Kenshin said she had a smile on her face. And, knowing him as she did, Kaoru was aware of how guilty he would feel. "Akira, that was the last name she said."

"He was her fiancé." – Kaoru spoke for the first time. Her tone was resolute. It wasn't her story to tell, but Kenshin deserved an explanation, and he would have it. "He was the reason for all of this."

Kenshin's eyebrow knitted together. He never assumed the two women were friends, so, how could Kaoru know that? "She came here to avenge his death."- She took a deep breath, unsure that there would be an easy way to tell him the truth: "That's the reason she joined that group on the Black Forest: To destroy Inshin."

::

_"_**Kyiosato, please stop! Don't do this!" – an old man yelled, but it was already too late…**

**It happened so fast… In one moment he was running In Kenshin's direction on the other he was dragging his maimed body to reach a flower maybe a meter away from him.  
>"How stupid was I?... Forgive-me anata… I hope you to forgive-me Tomoe…"<br>Kenshin tried to understand what he was mumbling about, but he only heard the name Tomoe…  
><strong>

_**This man had a family…**_

**While cleaning his sword he glanced at his own reflection and only then he realized the bleeding on his left cheek. His eyes widened when he touched his face. It was a cut. It didn't hurt but it was bleeding a lot. **

**_I dindn't notice…_ **

**Kenshin glanced back at the man behind him. He was already dead. _Your wish to kill me was strong_… he walked next to him pick up the flower he once tried to grab and put it in Kyiosato's hand. _I wish you were successful…_**

**:::**

Kenshin closed his eyes: "It was me, wasn't I?" his voice was low and his hand flew to the scar on his face…. Kenshin would remember those two people every time he look at the mirror.

Kenshin shook his head negatively: "Kaoru, but the traitor was Iizuka."

Kaoru nod: "Yes, but, they thought it would be easier if they use a woman…"

"Use a woman? To do what?" – how could they involve someone like Tomoe in their plans?

"To know tour weaknesses Kenshin..." - she finally said.

At first Kenshin stared at Kaoru in disbelief, but then….

:::

_"Come on Kenshin, have a drink with me!" – Iizuka insisted._

_"I've told you before… No." – Kenshin was happy that they finished soon so that he could see how Kaoru was doing in her job._

_"We can go to Aka, it's near here." __Why was Iizuka insisting so much for him to join him? Kenshin only accepted because he thought it would be nice to join Kaoru in her way home. When they arrived, Kenshin saw a girl waiting at the table but his eyes turned in other direction. He was looking for Kaoru._

_"Himura, this is my cousin Tomoe." – Kenshin bowed his head and sat down at Iizuka's side. "She is staying with us for a while… I am thinking of asking Katsura to let her stay in his place during the day."_

_Kenshin nod. "It's safe… Until we don't know who the traitor is, our families still in danger." – he answered thinking about his own situation._

_"Our families?" – Iizuka laughed – "Are you talking about the Kamyia girl?" – he said staring at Tomoe._

_He found his companion's attitude odd: "Kaoru is my only family. So, yes, of course I am referring to her."_

_"Don't get this in the wrong way, but… I think you should choose someone different from her… A grown up woman… Kaoru is just a girl… she barely has sixteen."_

_Kenshin turned his head towards him: "I Think I still in charge of my own life. And if you want our friendship to endure you will never again refer to Kaoru without the respect you own to any other woman who is not yours or from your family." – his tone made it clear this was a warning. _

_::::_

Kenshin sighed. That was the reason. He wanted him to turn his affections over Tomoe, so that she could discover his fragilities… But Kaoru was already the owner of his thoughts at that time, and for that possession Iizuka tried to put her down to.

"Coward." – he muttered thinking about Iizuka.

"Tomoe end up regretting, because she came to me, told me the truth and asked for my help. She warned me that Iizuka was the traitor." – Kaoru placed her hand on his: "None of this was your fault Kenshin."

He glanced at her and shook his head. By the look on his eyes, she knew he didn't believe her words: "Are you sure? Akira wouldn't be dead if it wasn't me, Tomoe wouldn't be dead if I didn't kill her fiancé on first place, and you… " – he looked back at Kaoru and placed his hand on her back remembering of Jin-Hei and Iizuka's attacks: "You almost died because of me Kaoru…" – he rubbed his tempers: "Everyone around me tends to die… I… attract death."

Kaoru shook him: "I am not dead. I am here with you." – she lifted his chin: "You can't save the world Kenshin. People make their own choices: Akira chose to come here and become a samurai, Tomoe choose to get revenge from his death… And I…" – She made him look to her again because Kenshin was already looking down, hiding his eyes from her. His burden just got a lot bigger with the acknowledge of Tomoe's situation: "I choose you."

Even if she missed Misao and Sano, even if she had a feeling that this happiness wasn't going to last… she wanted to make him happy, even if, all of this was just a dream. "I have something for you." – she opened a smile. _I knew you would be useful someday. _

Kenshin eyes widened looking at the small box on her hands. A gift? He had never received a gift before, except for the sword his master gave him, but that was a long time ago. It was a strange feeling, embarrassing at first, but then curiosity filled him and he took the box from her hands and opened it.

On the inside there was a silver plate, (the one Yumi gave Kaoru), but it was the inscription that made him smile.

_Kenshin Himura, from yours K,K_

"It's for you to never forget about me…" – Kaoru words reached his ears and all he could do was to embrace her, but then, he stopped. "Are you thinking about leaving?" – there was a glint of alarm in his voice. Kaoru shook her head negatively: "No." – She wasn't thinking of leaving, but there was an inner voice that was always telling her:. _Don't get used to this, it's not going to last forever…_

"So, How could to forget about you? You'll always be here, by my side. You're not going anywhere far from me anymore. I will always remember you, because you are the woman I love." – he placed his arms around her and hold her tight. Kaoru's head rested at his neck.

_I wish this to be forever… please…_

"But… this inscription… it's not right." – he got back to a sitting position and stared at the plate with his eyebrows knitting together.

"No, Kenshin, I checked, and your name is well written, and the K,K stands for Kamyia Kaoru, my name." – she explained.

He chucked: "That's the problem." - Kaoru stared at him for a while. He wasn't sad or angry, he seemed to be enjoying this situation. "I don't understand." – she said a little disappointed.

Kenshin smiled at her confusion. He couldn't delay this any further after everything they passed: "The initials of your name are wrong… because…" – he stared down at the gift and then at her: "I wish you to be _Himura_ Kaoru…"

Kaoru eyes widened in surprise and her heart start pounding faster. Kenshin continued: "If you accept to marry me, of course." – he asked, anticipation in his voice. He was afraid. He never did something like this before, he was never a romantic man, and he knew he was doing it all backwards. He had no ring to give her, no flowers… instead she was the one that was giving him a gift… that increased his fear that she could say no.

Tears rolled down her eyes. "Himura… Kaoru?" never before she had thought of herself as his woman… never since the day she met him in her dreams. That man was literally the man of her dreams and she knew with all her heart mind and soul that she wanted no one else. Only Kenshin. He was hers, he was her child dream coming true.

"I know it's not an honorable name, but it's… the only one I have to give." – he said. His fears were increasing at her single expression…. Was she crying because she was happy, or because she was sad?

"And it's the only one I want to… No one else Mr Himura, only you." – her smile grew bigger and Kenshin's heart melt, His hands cupped her face as he kissed every single tear on her cheeks: "I'm in love with you since I was a child, you have no idea of what you mean to me." – She said between sobs, making Kenshin's fears flew away.

What were they anyway? He couldn't remember anymore. He could only taste this moment, because she made him forget the misery his past was, Kaoru made him wish to live a new life, one with hope and sunny days.

His fingers tangled in her hair as their lips touched. That need… he wanted her in so many ways. He wanted her as his secret keeper as his shield, as his wife, as his lover…. Their kiss was getting so wild that Kaoru needed to stop to breathe. As she did it he flew to her neck, his tongue licking her skin made her shiver with pleasure. Kaoru placed her legs around his waist, totally forgetting the wound on her back. "Kenshin…" – she moaned on his ear.

Kenshin had to place both his hands on the sides so that he could hold both of their body weights. And then it was her time to go after his neck. Kenshin was astonished by the change of the positions. Now she was in control, and with Kaoru's mouth on his neck, her body on top of his making him feel things he never did before, Kenshin found it difficult to control his own body.

He wanted her and the desire was almost uncontrollable but he needed to stop it while he could. Kenshin wanted to do it right. He wanted to see her on a beautiful dress, he wanted to promise his love before God, he wanted to do this right….

And fast.

"Kaoru… wait, please." – he said. When she stopped to look at him, she was panting, as he was. "Have I done something wrong?" – she asked worried. He smiled and his right hand caressed her cheek: "No, my love… It's just that I want to do things right this time."

She sat back : "What do you mean?"

He took a deep breath: "I mean… Marriage. I want you to be safe and protected. I will always protect you Kaoru, you and your dignity. You deserve nothing less than that. Also, I want everyone to know that you are Himura Kaoru, my wife."

Kaoru blushed. Kenshin wanted to make their union public. "And how much time do you think we need?"

"Tomorrow. We can arrange everything till tomorrow." – his smiled grew bigger – "Even because I can't wait longer."

Kaoru smiled back at him: "So, we have to wait…"

"Yes we do." – Kenshin fought against grabbing her to him again – "But I promise you, it will pay off." – she deserved to be treated like a princess, and he had something romantic in mind. He wanted to please her, we wanted the beginning of their married lives to be unforgettable.

**:::::::**

**:::::**

**:::**

**::**

_This is so good… I feel like my life is starting today. I could say that this was perfect if it wasn't for this dreams, about Sano and Misao and the words they say to me.. They make me feel sad and guilty for choosing Kenshin over them... I love my friends, but I love Kenshin above everyone else… _

_If only we could live all together… _

Kaoru sighed at that thought. She was waiting for Sakura to come and help her dress. She didn't sleep last night, after Kenshin's proposal…. Her mind was filled with thoughts of them, and how wonderful their married life would be.

She heard Sakura approaching and closed the diary.

_It is a new day, a new life_… she remembered the lyric of the song she used to hear so long ago.

_I've been waiting for you..._

_Here I am. _

_:::_

Sakura and Katsura couldn't hide their smiles. The couple in front of them was so happy that it was contagious. Kenshin's clothes match Kaoru's eyes, and Kaoru herself was wearing a beautiful white kimono with dark blue flowers.

Katsura knew about the wedding, but Kenshin asked for privacy. He wanted something simple and discrete. There were no guests, just he and Kaoru. And Katsura made no imposition in that.

"Me and Sakura, we are very happy to see you together." – Katsura said as they sat to take breakfast.

"And that everything is over now." – Sakura added, her face was still red on the spot Iizuka hit her.

"Did they found out the traitor?" – Kenshin couldn't say Iizuka's name… Even now, he couldn't believe that someone he trusted so much, was able to do such horrible things. Every time he thought about the way he found Kaoru, and how he seemed to be enjoying to see her suffer… he simple went mad.

"He is dead. As long as everyone else in the forest." – Katsura answered – "No more threats."

Kaoru sighed in relief: "That's so good to hear."

"What about Tomoe's brother? Did you found him?" – Kenshin remembered the boy he met in Otsu. He would need help. He had just lost the closest person he had to a mother….

"Nothing. No traces of him." – Katsura said. – "It's just like he vanished… I warned at town that if they found a boy who matches the description you gave me, that they should send him to me."

"We will take care of him." – Sakura said with a frown of smile forming in her lips. She hadn't met the boy yet, but she already knew that once found, she wanted to take care of him, to shield him from every evil and to make him understand that he could be happy, despite of what happened.

"Well, but that's enough talking. I think you have a busy day ahead, so, you should get going." – Katsura and Kenshin nod in agreement. And Kenshin glanced at Sakura: "Don't worry it's being taken care of." - she said.

"What's being taken care?" – Kaoru asked but the only response she received was a smile. Understanding that it was something that she would only knew later, she said: "Thank you for everything. I will never forget what you did for me."

Sakura nod and smiled: "It's not like we will never see each other again… You'll live on Kenshin's house, so, I am going to see you often."

Kaoru smiled and nod, trying to disguise that strange feeling she had since last night.

"Let's go." – she heard his voice calling her and when she looked at him, Kenshin was offering her his hand, which she accepted freely: "Yes."

**::::**

::::

::::

_I promise to love and fight for you till the day I die. _

_I promise to never leave you alone._

_Nothing will tear us apart._

_Nothing Anata._

_Aishiteru._

Kaoru's eyes opened slowly, adjusting to the light. Her body was aching but she could hold that pain. It was more fatigue than pain, anyway. As she fully opened her eyes, she smiled and blushed immediately. She was on his arms… and she was naked. Then Kaoru remembered last day events:

Kenshin took her to a place, kind of a monastery were they got married… She could live a thousand years and would never forget the look of contentment on his eyes and his words as they walked together to the town, his thoughts for the future, their future... He seemed so light and free from the demons that used to chase him all the time.

Then, at night, when they arrived to his home and entered in his room, Kaoru saw petals spread all over the floor, as small candles illuminated the place around their futon. "It's so beautiful Kenshin."

She became nervous. The night before, at Katsura's house, when they started kissing each other, they let themselves being driven by desire. She totally forgot her fears as she acted without thinking. But now, seeing how he cared to make this moment special to her, she remembered that this would be her first time.

Kenshin understood her hesitation, so he grabbed her hand and kissed it, then his kisses rose to her face, her eyes, her cheeks, then down to her neck, and as her clothes were stopping him to go any further, he placed his hands on her obi and his fingers gently unraveled it. Kaoru placed her hands on Kenshin's shoulders and his clothes also fell exposing his chest. As her kimono was loose without the obi, Kaoru felt his warm hands touching her skin and she loved how it felt.

Slowly Kenshin lead her to the futon. As they lay down, Kenshin's mouth flew to her breasts. Kaoru moaned with pleasure. Never in her life she felt that before. Her nails craved into the skin of his back as she couldn't control herself anymore. "Kenshin…." – she whispered.

As his tongue was playing with one of her nipples his hand went down and Kaoru opened her legs to received it. She couldn't think anymore she could only feel. They stood that way for a while, but when Kaoru thought it couldn't get better, she felt the weight of his body on hers, and even if it hurt at the beginning, she was so pleased that she pleaded for more and more and more… and he did it as she asked. Only stopping when both of them were exhausted.

Then Kenshin hold her in his arms and they fell asleep, smiling.

::

Kaoru was daydreaming. She was so lost in thoughts that failed to realize that he was awake for a while. "Good morning." – she said blushing.

He kissed her on the lips: "Good morning, my wife. It's good that you're beautiful face is the first thing I see in the morning." Kaoru blushed even more.

"What were you thinking?" – he trace her lips with his fingers – "You were smiling."

Kaoru blushed even more, her face was as red as a tomato: "No..Nothing."

He grinned and got up. Kaoru stared at him. Last night they were almost in the dark only with the fragile light of the candles. But now she could see all his body clearly. Even with all the scars from the fights he had, he was still gorgeous. Kaoru felt she wanted to repeat last night, but before she could do anything else, he extended his hand to her: "Let's take a bath."

**:::::::::**

It was winter and the snow made it a little difficult to walk. Kenshin had told her he wanted to take her to a special place, and she agreed.

She saw it from distance. It was a garden.

"I had planned to take you here because the sakura flowers are so beautiful, and I knew you would love to see them." – his hand rubbed the back of his head – "But I forgot that it was already winter."

Kaoru burst into laugh. How could he forget that it was already winter? There was snow everywhere!

"Now, you're thinking your husband is crazy." – he crossed his arms – "Don't you?" – she bend down to grab some snow. "Not crazy… just a little…" – she molded the snow into a ball – "distracted!" – she said throwing him a snow ball. Kenshin dodged… "Oh… I see." – he made a snow ball on his own – "Maybe I am not that distracted." – he threw it to her but he failed intentionally.

Kaoru giggled happily that they could act so free after all this months of pressure. They both started throwing snow balls at each other laughing like children. Kenshin felt this was the happiest he had ever been. Kenshin exhaled and smiled looking at her. _My wife._

It was in that moment his eyes captured a light coming from the ground. "Kaoru, watch out!"A bright white light imposed itself between he and Kaoru. "Kaoru!" – he saw her falling on her knees with both hands on her chest.

She widened her eyes in horror as she seemed to be recognizing the meaning of that light.

_Oh, no,,, My time here is over…_

Fighting the pain on her chest she got up and tried to pass through the light, but she couldn't. It became like a wall, and was getting thicker and thicker at every second. She shook her head: "Kenshin…. I can't fight this." – tears rolled down her eyes.

It was the end, the end of something that was only in the beginning.

Kenshin unsheathed his sword and launched an attack against the invisible "wall". It didn't even scratch. He did again and again and again, until exhaustion, he feel on his knees and stared at her. Kaoru placed her hands on the wall… all she wanted to do was to touch his face one more time:

"I am sorry Kenshin."

_I promise to love and fight for you till the day I die. _

_I promise to never leave you alone._

_Nothing will tear us apart._

_Nothing Anata._

_Aishiteru._

"Nooo!" – he got up again. He would destroy that stupid wall. "Kaoru step back!" – he shouted. Those were the promises he made her on their wedding day. This were his vows. He would never break his vows, most of all the ones he made to her.

_"Doryusen!" – _The ground all way from the place he put his sword till the invisible wall was destroyed and the wall cracked.

It was hard for Kaoru too keep her eyes open, the pain on her chest was almost unbearable making it almost impossible to breath.

_I am sorry Kenshin, I am sorry… I just can't hold this anymore…. _

_I am sorry…_

"Kaoru!"

_::::::::::::::::::::::_

_:::::_

_:::_

_::_

She tried to open her eyes, but the light on the other side was too intense.

_Am I dead? _

That didn't really mattered now, that life had decided to take away from her the person she loved the most. First her parents, now… him.

There was no will to live after this.

She took a deep breath. Death is the opposite of life, death is emptiness, and even if her heart was empty, she could feel the energy around her…

_So, I am not dead_.

_I wish I was. _

Kaoru tried to open her eyes. And even if every time she tried, tears fell from the exposure at the light, she kept on trying. When she was finally succeeded, all she could see was: White. She would hate that color from now on.

There were no shapes or other colors on the place she fixed her eyes on.

Kaoru felt a commotion on her chest. _"Where Am I?"_ She closed her eyes again. _Please, please, let me come back to him again… please… _she prayed so hard that she forgot to let go the air she hold on her lungs. _There's no point in living if I am not with him… _

**BIP… BIP…**

_My place is by his side…. _She prayed remembering the vow he choose to make on their wedding day.

_I promise to love and fight for you till the day I die. _

_I promise to never leave you alone._

The way he touched her face and how his eyes locked on hers as he talked…

_Nothing will tear us apart._

_Nothing Anata._

_Aishiteru_

**BIP! BIP!BIP!BIP!**

Kaoru opened her eyes to see what was causing that noise and only then she remembered to let go the air she had held on her lungs for so long.

:::::::::::

Kaoru was frightened when she saw all the equipment surrounding her. The constant BIP seemed to be monitoring her heart rhythm and it was beating faster and faster, making the machine sound uncontrollable.

_Where Am I? I don't want be he here!_

As an answer to her question, a woman dressed in white rushed into the room. "What's happening to the machines?" – she turned her head to every equipment trying to understand what was leaving them crazy. When she finally looked to the bed, and saw Kaoru with her eyes open she sighed in relief.

"Miss Kaoru…" – she gave her a genuine smile – "You're awake. Your friends will be so happy to hear that."

Kaoru shook her head as tears fell freely.

The nurse sat next to her and grabbed her hand: "Shhh… Everything is going to be all right, ok?"

Kaoru heard the door opening. The nurse turned her attention to a woman with black long hair and vivid red lips: "Doctor Megumi, she is awake, but haven't said a word yet."

The other woman smiled: "It's ok. Her body is still numb. Give her some time." – she turned her attention to Kaoru.

Why does everyone seemed so happy to see her awake? She didn't want to be there!

"Call her friends please." – she said to the nurse. Then she sat on the bed: "Welcome back, Kamyia Kaoru."

:::::::::::::::

Dr Megumi was with Kaoru for almost an hour. Making sure that all her vitals were fine. And even if Kaoru was still in shock and her mind was foggy, she understood what the doctor explained about her being in coma for more than six months.

"I SWEAR THAT IF YOU DON'T LET ME GO INSIDE YOU'LL REGRET!" – they heard someone yelling. Kaoru immediately recognized the owner of the voice. Sano.

"I am sorry… I don't know him." – she heard Misao saying – "It's just a coincidence that we came together."

The door swung open with so much strength that it hit the wall behind it. "KAORU!" – they both yelled running to her.

Kaoru's lips curved into a smile, and even if she wanted to talk, she couldn't find any words to say. She stretched her hand to touch Sano's hand and then Misao's braid. "We're so happy to see you're awake." – Misao said. "Don't ever do something like this to us, again Missy."

Megumi picked Sano apart and scolded him: "You can't come here like this!" – she pointed to the door: "You almost destroyed the place!"

Sano rubbed the back of his head: "Sorry Meg…"

"She needs peace, ok? Rash reactions like this, only make it worse!" – she said still angry with Sano.

"Damn, you don't need to be so mean to me. She is my friend and she was out for what? Six months? When the nurse called saying she was awake, we left school and drove right here ignoring red lights and all traffic rules! It's normal that we're excited to see her awake again!"- he answered back.

"I know…. But she needs to rest. She is not coming home today. She needs at least three more days here. I want to make sure she is out of any danger." – Megumi said.

:::::

**Three days after**

Misao looked back at Kaoru: "I am so happy that you're leaving today!"

Kaoru forced a smile. This was exhausting. Trying to please her friends showing appreciation for what they did to her… doing everything on her reach to hide she wasn't happy at all.

She heard Misao sighing. "What's happening Kaoru?" – she sat at her side and placed her hand on Kaoru's back.

"I am sorry Misao. I am happy to see you again… It's just that…" – she closed her eyes and swallowed hard. _He is not here. _"I don't feel me anymore."

Misao looked directly at her eyes: "What do you mean?"

_Should I tell her? She is going to assume that I am crazy! _Kaoru felt that her heart wouldn't hold the weight of a secret like that. _Was Kenshin just a dream? _It couldn't have been. _No! He was real, he is real! Our love is real… his kisses his touch… it was all real. But how am I going to explain it to her?_

"Misao I need to tell you one thing… And you will have to believe me." – Kaoru stared straight into Misao huge green eyes.

"Of course I will." – her friend replied.

Kaoru started: "Misao I…"

"Hei! Are you ladies ready to leave this freaking place?" – Sano got in and both girls stared at him for a while: "Hospitals make me sick." – he said in response to their look. "I just want to get the hell out of here."

Kaoru and Misao sighed with a smile on their lips. After all Sano was Sano… Kaoru got up from bed slowly, she was still learning how to walk again. "Let's go."

"But I thought you wanted to tell me something?" – Misao gave her arm to Kaoru so that she could support herself. "I tell you later."

As Kaoru tried to walk as fast as she could, she saw Dr Megumi passing almost at her side. "Wait Misao, I wanna thank her." – but Misao stopped her: "Don't you see all the nurses around her? And there someone lying on a stretcher. She is busy. And believe me Kaoru if you go there now, she will not be nice to you."

Kaoru sighed: "Ok."

"Come on let's go home." – Sano insisted – "You come here to thank her in another day, And I come with you too."

Misao grinned: "Sano thinks he has a chance with her."

"With Doctor Megumi?" – Kaoru raised her eyebrow

"Shut up weasel! Let's go home." – he picked Kaoru on his arms: "I have to do everything by myself."

"Wait, I just want to go to a place first."

Sano and Misao exchanged glances but end up agreeing.

:::::

He opened his eyes. _Where Am I?_

Looking around the room he could see different kinds of machines, but no one else was on the inside. He didn't need to look, he just felt it. He got up to a sitting position and then Ignoring the sense of numbness on his body, he turned around. But as his feet touched the ground, as he tried to get up, he fell immediately.

_What's happening to me? _

He felt someone approaching the room. "Already awake?" – a feminine voice said, then she helped him to get up: "How do you feel?" – she tried her best smile.

"Weird." – he said.

The woman with long black hair and red vivid lips asked: "Can you explain me what happened?"

He stared back at her blankly. She waited for a while, but as the answer never came she asked again: "Kenshin? Kenshin? Are you listening?"

He shook his head:"What did you just called me?"

The woman mouth opened in realization. Then she took something out of her pocket: "Your name is Kenshin HImura. That's all I know." – _he lost his memory._

The red-haired man took the silver plate on his hand and read the inscription on it.

_Kenshin Himura with love K,K_

He held the object on his hand tightly. "Why can't I…"

"Let's take things easy Kenshin. Sometimes this happens. You know, maybe you hit your head hard… Don't worry your memory will come back."

"Are you sure?" – he asked confused. "How do you know that?"

"I am a doctor, I know things." – she smiled. Then a small object on her hand started bipping. "I have to go now Kenshin. Just please wait here, I will come back in a minute."

As he found himself alone in the room again. Kenshin tried to get up supporting himself on the objects around him.

The mirror.

He needed to see his face on the mirror, he needed to know if he remembered who he was.

He stared at the strange in front of him.

"Who are you?" – Then his hand touched the scar on his left cheek:

"If you are Kenshin Himura, then…" – he looked down at the silver chain on his hand: "Who is K,K?"

:::::::::::::::::::….

Sano stopped the car in front of the stationery store. "You want to buy a diary?" – Misao asked Kaoru and she nod opening the car door.

Misao went after her.

_Someone once told me that my truth was a fantasy. _

_It might be a fantasy… But for me it was real._

_ I will never forget the friends I made in Japan: Sakura, Katsura, Yumi, Yahiko, Aoshi, Hannya… And most of all I will never ever forget you… the owner of my heart and soul:_

_Kenshin Himura._

:::::::::

**THE END**

**:::::::::::::::::::::::::::**

**Ok, don't kill me, please... Let me explain before you do it, ok?**

**First of all... The sex scene between Kenshin and Kaoru... It wasn't easy for me to write it in English... So, I am sorry if it's not good...I think it was only regular.**

**About the end:**

**Kenshin managed to travel in time along with Kaoru, but he lost his memory during the process. Kaoru fights between the dream and reality... and she is afraid that if she tells the truth people would think that she is crazy... **

**They have been almost side by side on the hospital and they didn't met! The patient Megumi and the nurses were attending when Kaoru wanted to go there to thank her, was in fact, Kenshin.**

**As I've said before, this story will have a second half - named My Time Machine - By Your Side.**

**I think Kenshin and Kaoru deserved a better future, and even if they were together, if they stayed in Japan, in the past... Kenshin would be haunted by his past forever. **

**So, I decided this was the best for both of them.**

**The question is: Are they going to met in the Present? He lost his memory, so, if he sees her, will he recognize her? Will Kaoru be ready to move on after some years?**

**Hope you're not mad at me, and I also hope you to be happy to know this wasn't totally the end.**

**It was just the beginning of something different.**

**I am anxious to hear your opinions.**

**I am writing a new story too, called Powerless - it will be short, maybe ten chapters - I don't know if I will start posting it before or after My Time Machine - By Your Side.**

**Anyway, I hope to hear something from you...**

**Thank you for all the support and love...**

**Yours Jou chan**


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